Charlie ocd Posted August 12, 2019 Share Posted August 12, 2019 (edited) I just told my care coordinator this im thinking something like this will happen if i see children or ill be too nervous around them.Is this still ocd im having other sexual thoughts that i think will happen.I feel like taking my life now but i cant go through with it. What happens now I'm really worried I've said that to her. Edited August 12, 2019 by Charlie ocd Link to comment
Angst Posted August 12, 2019 Share Posted August 12, 2019 You suffer from an anxiety disease so you are worried. But I thought that you were going to talk to a therapist. You have two diagnoses OCD and psychotic depression. You have committed no criminal act so nothing bad can happen. Perhaps you should now take Hal’s advice and reengage with an advocate. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 12, 2019 Author Share Posted August 12, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, Angst said: You suffer from an anxiety disease so you are worried. But I thought that you were going to talk to a therapist. You have two diagnoses OCD and psychotic depression. You have committed no criminal act so nothing bad can happen. Perhaps you should now take Hal’s advice and reengage with an advocate. Hi I did tell my old cpn that in an email I need to ask the carecordinator what's happening about it.Im not all there in the head I've called the crisis line a few times nothing they can do.cant call for an ambulance and go through all that.Im seeing a psychiatrist in about 2 weeks time. Thanks Edited August 12, 2019 by Charlie ocd Link to comment
malina Posted August 12, 2019 Share Posted August 12, 2019 Hi Charlie, I don't know about your circumstances but I'm very sorry that you're in such a bad place right now. I just wanted to send you some kind words and tell you to hang in there, mate. You can get through this, stay strong and be kind to yourself. If you're feeling really bad, I believe that Samaritans is also a good resource for help. You're not alone, we're all struggling with this illness and understand your pain. There is hope, stay strong!! Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 13, 2019 Author Share Posted August 13, 2019 (edited) 17 hours ago, malina said: Hi Charlie, I don't know about your circumstances but I'm very sorry that you're in such a bad place right now. I just wanted to send you some kind words and tell you to hang in there, mate. You can get through this, stay strong and be kind to yourself. If you're feeling really bad, I believe that Samaritans is also a good resource for help. You're not alone, we're all struggling with this illness and understand your pain. There is hope, stay strong!! Thanks malina I'm thinking it's not ocd and I'm very scared. Edited August 13, 2019 by Charlie ocd Link to comment
Handy Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 No one wishes they have OCD. If you have feelings of self harm you need to turn yourself into a hospital ASAP & get treatment. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 18, 2019 Author Share Posted August 18, 2019 If I think it will happen can it still b ocd Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 19, 2019 Author Share Posted August 19, 2019 I'm really scared this isn't ocd can someone please say something. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 20, 2019 Author Share Posted August 20, 2019 Why isn't anybody saying anything I'm really worried it isn't ocd. Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 I think you're expecting too much from the forum. You need to be discussing your concerns with the mental health team mate. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 20, 2019 Author Share Posted August 20, 2019 41 minutes ago, PhilM said: I think you're expecting too much from the forum. You need to be discussing your concerns with the mental health team mate. I have phill I told them about it they said it's an intrusive thought i told them today about seeing that young girl on the tv and feeling like i liked it.what do you think about it. Link to comment
Angst Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 I think that all that the forum can do is to reassure you. Your CMHT team have said that you have intrusive thoughts. All that we can do is to repeat this message. Has you cc arranged an appointment with a therapist and has your psychiatrist visited you this week? What do you do to occupy your mind? OCD and other mental illness preoccupations will take up permanent residence in your mind unless you actively pursue other thoughts such as decorating your flat, playing video games or doing an online course. Or whatever. This is important because I think that you are alone for a vast proportion of the day. Solitary confinement is difficult. People who survive it develop a strategy. Take care of yourself. Link to comment
Handy Posted August 20, 2019 Share Posted August 20, 2019 Yes & exercise in nature. It does wonders. Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 12 hours ago, Angst said: I think that all that the forum can do is to reassure you. Your CMHT team have said that you have intrusive thoughts. All that we can do is to repeat this message. Has you cc arranged an appointment with a therapist and has your psychiatrist visited you this week? What do you do to occupy your mind? OCD and other mental illness preoccupations will take up permanent residence in your mind unless you actively pursue other thoughts such as decorating your flat, playing video games or doing an online course. Or whatever. This is important because I think that you are alone for a vast proportion of the day. Solitary confinement is difficult. People who survive it develop a strategy. Take care of yourself. Totally agree. I understand completely why you are asking questions @Charlie ocd and I know it's distressing for you when no-one responds or doesn't respond quickly but the forum isn't going to "make you better" and (unintentionally) you might be starting to rely on it. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 17 hours ago, Angst said: I think that all that the forum can do is to reassure you. Your CMHT team have said that you have intrusive thoughts. All that we can do is to repeat this message. Has you cc arranged an appointment with a therapist and has your psychiatrist visited you this week? What do you do to occupy your mind? OCD and other mental illness preoccupations will take up permanent residence in your mind unless you actively pursue other thoughts such as decorating your flat, playing video games or doing an online course. Or whatever. This is important because I think that you are alone for a vast proportion of the day. Solitary confinement is difficult. People who survive it develop a strategy. Take care of yourself. I see the psychiatrist and mentioned pikup at the maudsley I have to first see someone at the maudsley before I can get that cbt.That is going to b difficult for me I said to the cc can we get a cab.ive asked to be put back on clomipremen because I did come off it.I dont know when I'll be seeing about pickup. I dont do anything to occupy my mind only the tv sometimes.I just dont want to do anything I'm in my bedroom most the day i use earplugs trying to block out what I'm hearing. Thanks Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 (edited) OK I can't comment on all your issues as I don't or didn't share all of them but I can say from the heart that there are ways of calming yourself down physically and mentally and I think you need to ask the CMHT about anxiety management among other things. Do you think you could make a list of questions? You don't have to it all in one go; add to it as things come up. Edited August 21, 2019 by PhilM Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 18 minutes ago, PhilM said: OK I can't comment on all your issues as I don't or didn't share all of them but I can say from the heart that there are ways of calming yourself down physically and mentally and I think you need to ask the CMHT about anxiety management among other things. Do you think you could make a list of questions? You don't have to it all in one go; add to it as things come up. Hi phill I've been seeing the new cc just a few times now I'm not communicating with her properly.she left me print outs of information about ways to cope with anxiety.sometimes I can read them but most times I cant.My concentration is really bad. I have been taking diazepam only when I'm really bad but it's very hard to get hold of.Ill give the printouts another go it all depends on how I'm feeling.Oh I asked again today about seeing that young girl on the tv the cc said the shrink says it's an intrusive thought from my ocd. Cheers Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 It is mate. That's not reassurance. I lived in terror for a long time so know what it's like but there are ways to improve your life although I understand you can't see it right now. Link to comment
Angst Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 (edited) Hi Charlie. Rather than using earplugs use headphones to listen to radio and music. This will stimulate your brain and help you refocus your attention to things apart from the voices. Just wanting to do nothing is the depression speaking. It wants you to do nothing. But building up activity slowly will help to lift it. If you do something slowly and physically such as model clay, paint or draw. I did some art therapy once and it does help. You could paint a mural.( It is a pity that the vast majority of day centres have closed where art therapy and other forms of occupational therapy were the norm.) A friend of mine built models and exhibited them. Or just redecorate a room. Depression drains us of energy put spend some time housekeeping. You could cook some adventurous meals. When my concentration went some years ago I devoted time to reading. Starting with simple things and slowly increasing the complexity of the text. Phil’s idea of writing is a good thing. It will help you sharpen your thoughts and help you communicate with the cc and the people at PICKuP. But do during the day use headphones not earplugs. Edited August 21, 2019 by Angst Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 35 minutes ago, PhilM said: It is mate. That's not reassurance. I lived in terror for a long time so know what it's like but there are ways to improve your life although I understand you can't see it right now. Ok mate I didn't know I thought the worst I'm living in terror now. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 1 hour ago, PhilM said: It is mate. That's not reassurance. I lived in terror for a long time so know what it's like but there are ways to improve your life although I understand you can't see it right now. I've had this ocd 17 years and never acted on a thought.I haven't bumped into children for a long time.even all the school holidays and I'm on the 7th floor.it scares the life out of me when I need to bring the rubbish down in the lift. Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 I was the same mate - plus I spent time in hospital. When I started to learn to not take the thoughts so seriously it took a lot of the fear out of it. When I was first diagnosed I didn't have access to the internet like most people back in the mid-90s and apart from telephone numbers for organisations like No Panic I had to try and live with the condition to the best of my ability. It was very hard AND lonely AND I felt like a weirdo. If you can start, with help and support, to take those thoughts a little less seriously it will make a lot of difference. Link to comment
Charlie ocd Posted August 21, 2019 Author Share Posted August 21, 2019 28 minutes ago, PhilM said: I was the same mate - plus I spent time in hospital. When I started to learn to not take the thoughts so seriously it took a lot of the fear out of it. When I was first diagnosed I didn't have access to the internet like most people back in the mid-90s and apart from telephone numbers for organisations like No Panic I had to try and live with the condition to the best of my ability. It was very hard AND lonely AND I felt like a weirdo. If you can start, with help and support, to take those thoughts a little less seriously it will make a lot of difference. ok phill when it started happening for me i didnt know it was ocd and i didnt have the internet back then.Soon as i found out it was ocd i joined this forum and i could relate to others on here.I get very lonely and yeah i feel messed up in the head like twisted ive had no friends for a very long time now.Im going back on clomipremen hopefully that will help with the thoughts too.Thanks for your advice. Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 Mate I really do want the best for you but I'm aware in the past I've not been as sensitive as I should have been for which I apologise. I know where you are at the moment is awful because I've been there but I swear it can get better. I'll come on the forum tomorrow to see how you are OK? Link to comment
PhilM Posted August 22, 2019 Share Posted August 22, 2019 How's your day going @Charlie ocd? Link to comment
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