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Wolf06

Hit and run ocd

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Do you mean where you are worried you've knocked someone down or had an accident and not noticed?

Yes I've had this and yes I've applied CBT to it. I sometimes still get doubt now but I don't act on it, so it doesn't affect me anymore. 

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50 minutes ago, Gemma7 said:

Do you mean where you are worried you've knocked someone down or had an accident and not noticed?

Yes I've had this and yes I've applied CBT to it. I sometimes still get doubt now but I don't act on it, so it doesn't affect me anymore. 

What do you mean you applied CBT to it 

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Any advice on how to manage this would be so appreciated.  I’m so stuck on this that I can’t drive at this point and it is really disabling my life.  

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I mean I used cognitive behavioural therapy. So I looked at my thinking around the issue, which was worrying I'd hurt someone and then ignored it, what I felt it said about me, which was that if I did that then I was irresponsible and horrible. I then looked at my behaviours around it, mostly being hyper aware when driving, checking back, both physically and memory based. I then looked at how those behaviours made the situation worse, increasing my doubt and actually making me a less responsible driver. I changed my behaviour and learnt that I was more confident and safer not doing compulsions. Changing my behaviour, reduced the doubts and now it doesn't particularly bother me. Is that any help?

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Also, have you looked into getting CBT for your OCD. I recommend the self-help book Break free from OCD as a good guide to CBT too :)

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Any advice on how to manage this would be so appreciated.  I’m so stuck on this that I can’t drive at this point and it is really disabling my life.  

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16 minutes ago, Gemma7 said:

I mean I used cognitive behavioural therapy. So I looked at my thinking around the issue, which was worrying I'd hurt someone and then ignored it, what I felt it said about me, which was that if I did that then I was irresponsible and horrible. I then looked at my behaviours around it, mostly being hyper aware when driving, checking back, both physically and memory based. I then looked at how those behaviours made the situation worse, increasing my doubt and actually making me a less responsible driver. I changed my behaviour and learnt that I was more confident and safer not doing compulsions. Changing my behaviour, reduced the doubts and now it doesn't particularly bother me. Is that any help?

That is helpful. You said you check memory based.  I struggle with the same thing.  Like I’ll check my routes in my head and that will be a compulsion   A lot of ruminations  and it is ruining my life.  So you just stopped the physical checking and the mental checking? 

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Well essentially I did just stop but it was thought through carefully about what the purpose of stopping was using therapy. Checking is not worth ruining your life for. In people with OCD they often have an inflated sense of responsibility for preventing something bad from happening, but really you are no more responsible that the next driver. In not checking, it will feel risky and potentially make you feel horrible but you are actually only going to act like everyone else on the road. 

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14 minutes ago, Gemma7 said:

Well essentially I did just stop but it was thought through carefully about what the purpose of stopping was using therapy. Checking is not worth ruining your life for. In people with OCD they often have an inflated sense of responsibility for preventing something bad from happening, but really you are no more responsible that the next driver. In not checking, it will feel risky and potentially make you feel horrible but you are actually only going to act like everyone else on the road. 

Makes so much sense. I have these thoughts that I hit someone the last time I drove and I can’t seem to shake it. I know it’s not rational but the thoughts continue to appear in my head as obsessions.   Had you experienced this and what did you do to combat that ? 

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Yes I did, those thoughts are incredibly common in the OCD community. OCD was once called the doubting disease because of questions like this that it brings up. In reality you are probably a really safe driver who never wants to hurt anyone, that's why thoughts like this are so upsetting to you. People with OCD often place an overimportance on thoughts so if their brain comes up with a thought that bothers them they feel like they need to do something about it. The truth is in doing something it actually increases the likelihood of the thoughts coming back and it causes the cycle that is OCD. You need to break that vicious cycle with the help of therapy. 

I am now used to these thoughts and get them a whole lot less. They don't impact on my driving anymore and when they do pop up, I just take a leap of faith that if there was something to notice, I'd notice it and do no compulsions. 

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Hi ...yes I have had this theme. I used to spend a long time driving round to check I hadn't run anyone over or caused an accident. I had cbt and I was told to drive more and ignore the thoughts. I find it alot easier now but still maybe check about once every couple of months... which is better than every day!! It is doable xxxx

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8 hours ago, Wolf06 said:

Any advice on how to manage this would be so appreciated.  I’m so stuck on this that I can’t drive at this point and it is really disabling my life.  

You just can’t go back to look period. 

I don’t have it now but if I did I would get a dash cam. Technology for ocd.

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1 hour ago, Handy said:

I don’t have it now but if I did I would get a dash cam. Technology for ocd.

This is a really bad idea and not recommended at all in dealing with OCD. Using technology as part of compulsions will make any OCD you do have much much worse. Once you up the 'standard' OCD will take more and more time not less. No one should look to this as a solution. 

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Yes, I’ve struggled with this obsession. My compulsions usually involved looking back to check, driving along the same path several times to check, and trying to remember if I heard any emergency sirens during my drive. None of that helped obviously, so I would often spend days checking various news sources for any reports of accidents, checking my car for any evidence of a collision, and asking others if they had heard of any accidents in that area. I only mentioned these to give you an idea of the types of compulsions that you should avoid. The compulsions won’t help and will only keep you stuck in the anxiety loop.

We always know these thoughts are irrational, but we have to learn to accept the anxiety associated with those thoughts and practice not do any compulsions to ease that anxiety.

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Yes, I've also had this problem. I checked the car for evidence of a collision, stopped to listen if I hear emergency sirens and drove the same path several times. I don't do this any more since the last time I drove the same path several times I was stopped by the police asking why I was circling the area! I don't know what they suspected (maybe that I was looking for "my" drug dealer or waiting to pick up my partner coming from a burglary). Now how do you explain at 4am in a completely deserted town with no one on the streets that you're driving around checking if you hit someone! It  showed me the absurdity and it was a real nightmare and my fear of this happening again prevents me from doing this compulsion which then also reduced all the other compulsions - unfortunately not completely.

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11 hours ago, Handy said:

You just can’t go back to look period. 

I don’t have it now but if I did I would get a dash cam. Technology for ocd.

Pretty incredible really. Just wrong again. Obtuseness, or some kind of delberate sabotage? 

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13 hours ago, Handy said:

You just can’t go back to look period. 

I don’t have it now but if I did I would get a dash cam. Technology for ocd.

I was really hoping Handy you’d take on board my advice to help you on a previous thread where you also suggested replacing one compulsion with another.

Perhaps you missed it, if you have I’d urge you to really try and follow Gemma’s advice here:

12 hours ago, Gemma7 said:

This is a really bad idea and not recommended at all in dealing with OCD. Using technology as part of compulsions will make any OCD you do have much much worse. Once you up the 'standard' OCD will take more and more time not less. No one should look to this as a solution. 

This is important stuff Handy. Not just for your own recovery but also for others here who’re also doing their damndest working to overcome the disorder. If you’re maybe unsure about the nature of the disorder and what’s best to do to overcome it, can you perhaps have a think before replying and whether it’s really the right advice that will help others. If you’re not sure the team of Mods are always happy and available to help if you’d like to pass it by us via a PM.

Talking of which, again, perhaps you missed my reply to you a week or so ago asking you to repair your PMs, can you please do that? Thank-you🙂

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On 10/09/2019 at 16:29, Gemma7 said:

This is a really bad idea and not recommended at all in dealing with OCD. Using technology as part of compulsions will make any OCD you do have much much worse. Once you up the 'standard' OCD will take more and more time not less. No one should look to this as a solution. 

Sorry you feel that way without even asking how it would be used. Such presumptive editorializing without a definitive understanding of the response hurts my feelings. 

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Wow, first make others feel uncomfortable, then attempts to lay a guilt trip on someone. Mods, please step in here. These pieces of misinformation, these snipes, are actually damaging.  

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7 hours ago, Handy said:

Sorry you feel that way without even asking how it would be used. Such presumptive editorializing without a definitive understanding of the response hurts my feelings. 

I'm sorry your feelings are hurt handy, but my point was for the OP and the forum in general. 

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8 hours ago, Handy said:

Sorry you feel that way without even asking how it would be used. Such presumptive editorializing without a definitive understanding of the response hurts my feelings. 

Handy you knew full well how your post would be interpreted. I think you enjoy stirring the pot. This is trolling behaviour. 

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I used to use my phone for reassurance on a night out before I understood that this was getting me deeper into the hole. As said above, this is a compulsion, and will no doubt get out of control. Not a good idea.

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