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Who's ready to make changes in 2020?


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As I read through the threads on the forum I see dozens of threads all asking much the same.  Is this OCD? How can I make this go away? Am I a monster? How can I be certain?  What can I do? This time it;'s different...."

The particular worry or manifestation may differ but the root problem is the same, just variations on a theme.  The forum is also filled with page after page of good advice (although there is also a lot of reassurance given, albeit well-intentioned)  Obviously it's to be expected, we are after all an OCD Support Forum and the doubts and fears are scary.  But....and it's a very big BUT there is enough testament and advice showing what we can do to improve the outcome and start to escape the power of these intrusive fears.

COMPULSIONS.....The one thing that everybody does and the very thing that will ensure that OCD maintains its grip.  We need to change how we respond and react and only then will we start to see positive changes.  We have to take responsibility for our own role in recovery and that does require change.

Who's going to commit to start and make those changes in 2020?

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Gonna try to get better, it’s been hell the last 1-2 years and it’s really interfering with my life. The problem is I know I have ocd to an extent but I feel like some things are probably more than just ocd which kills me. Hopefully I’ll see a therapist soon I think it might help. Rn I’m ignoring some of my obsessions with decent success but others I’m still trying to think of to figure them out. I replay moments trying to remember what I was thinking and feeling and determine what they mean. 

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4 hours ago, Terriblethoughts said:

some things are probably more than just ocd which kills me

Nope, they're not anything more than OCD. I've read a few of your posts and they all point to classic OCD trying to mess with you. 

4 hours ago, Terriblethoughts said:

I replay moments trying to remember what I was thinking and feeling and determine what they mean

For 2020 dont do stuff like this anymore, that should be step 1 of your NY resolution. Don't give OCD the satisfaction by engaging with it.

Thank you for this post Caramoole, I have a feeling 2020 is my year to succeed ?? :D

 

 

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47 minutes ago, BM94 said:

Thank you for this post Caramoole, I have a feeling 2020 is my year to succeed ?? :D

 

 

Good to hear that :) It's by making that first commitment, the decision to change that you will succeed.

My OCD first reared its ugly head way back in the 1970's (as did Taureans).  It's very difficult for today's sufferers to imagine how lonely, frightening & bewildering it was back then.  The term "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" didn't exist.  The Internet didn't exist (and wouldn't for almost 20 years.  There were no books on the subject, it didn't appear in magazine articles or in television programmes.  There were no forums or support groups, no OCD specialists, zilch.  You were left very  much in your own Hell fearing you must be insane, and as such, kept this dark secret to yourself.  It was to be 20 years later that I had a diagnosis.

The condition was the same, the thoughts and fears were the same but the knowledge wasn't, the available support and treatment wasn't.  That s why it upsets me to see that we still have so many people paralysed with fear and not taking that leap of faith to start the journey to change their own destiny.  It's still not an easy journey but the information is there, the support is there, evidence is there from those who have taken the leap of faith to work on those things that are known to help and those that hinder.

Trust in yourself and in the experience of others and determine to make 2020 the year of change.  Let's arrive here in December 2020 and see some huge successes. 

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It was a lonely place, and I was scared in my twenties, I thought I was mad so daredn't tell anyone what I was thinking. 

Thank goodness there is so much more awareness, and places like our charity and the forums exist to help people. 

Only we ourselves can change our beliefs, generate some positive emotions instead and find some happiness. No-one else can do this for us. But others can encourage us, though need to avoid re-assuring. 

Watch for compulsions and work towards easing them out of daily life. 

Re-assurance - seeking is easy to spot. 

Rumination is going over and over obsessional thinking, looking for answers, googling trying to remember, looking for similar lines of thinking. But it won't help. 

Overthinking is something I fall into. It's giving far too much importance to something of minimal importance. Instead of this we need to just let go and move on. 

The best thing we can do to help ourselves is to learn acceptance. There is nothing unusual in having obsessional thoughts that result in compulsions and cause disorder - some 1% of the population will experience this in a significant way that affects their daily life. 

If you don't believe you are suffering from OCD, a good adage is "if it feels like OCD it probably is" - so go with that. 

 

 

 

Edited by taurean
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I have had OCD for as long as I can remember and am 62 now.  I cannot agree more about how lonely it was back then.  When I think of what my poor parents went through trying to help, not knowing what they were up against makes me want to cry.  I took the plunge and had therapy (ERP) a few years ago and it really helped. Although I have relapsed, I do have some strategies that I can use to help.  My New Year's resolution is to fix this once and for all.  I am going back to therapy and reading your post has really boosted my determination to beat this monster in my head.  Thank you 

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36 minutes ago, OldCrazyDame said:

My New Year's resolution is to fix this once and for all

Good on you :thumbup:  I hope you find the therapist you need.  It's hard when behaviours and reactions have been with us for so long but they can still be changed with help.  Good Luck to you and do share how you're getting on :)

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Thank you for this thread Caramoole! I really need some hope that things can change in 2020. OCD has turned me into a horrible person- I'm angry and irritable all of the time because I'm living in fear and it's just awful. I think that having prioritized OCD for several years I've actually lost some of my ability to empathize/care, some of my hopes, dreams, goals and I'm just left empty and living a purposeless life. 

It's really interesting to hear about how much worse things were for OCD sufferers in 1970s- it must have been so scary! 

 

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On 30/12/2019 at 14:23, battlethrough said:

Also caramool and taurean full respect, it must have been impossible to approach the subject

I wanted a new brain for Christmas too. 

I do think that in the future there will be a really good treatment available, I can visualise putting on a helmet and the doctor reprogramming certain elements of the brain that are producing the obsessional thinking. 

But right now we have to do it the hard way. 

There is no good form of OCD. There is no benefit to it. 

In my own case a genetic link is pretty clear, but there is no real value in looking for causes, much more value in learning to accept we are sufferers and work to overcome, or at least manage, that. 

A recent relapse has been really bad with a combination of new and old intrusions, repeating in mental chatter, stress depression and negative thinking bias. 

At 69 I have had plenty of previous experience of CBT, and it has for long periods worked nicely. It is always the gold standard place to work on OCD. 

So I am back on the process of applying the learnings of CBT, but also looking to fill up more time in my day so that the disorder has less time available. 

Additional hobbies such as cooking, and a local interest group of some sort are planned. And when the winter is over there are plenty of places for us to go here (we relocated here two years ago). 

Reclaiming a good place with the illness is proving difficult. 

A change in meds, and a seeking through a separate project to seek to boost up my positivity and happiness are also in progress. 

 

Edited by taurean
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Yes! I would like to re-commit to making more progress toward a life free from OCD!

I've made good progress in the past, but am still in its hold in far too many ways.

This year I would like to get to the point of using toilets other than my own on a regular basis.

If I could get that goal done that would be huge for me!

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Yes definetely!

I hope this year will be a decisive in my life, I decided not to dance with OCD any more and stop all my compulsions.  

Even though the doubts, the fears which I will disregard. Lets get back out life together! 

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