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Someone please help me. I can barely work. I can barely be alone. Even if I try to be calm I am freezing a few minutes later wondering I harmed a colleague of mine. I have urges to go to the police or always feel the colleague will go to the police and report that I harmed or misbehaved with him. 

Is this normal? If someone asked me to describe the incident, I sometimes feel I am capable of describing which makes it the incident even more credible in my head. 

I should atone for my misdoings, right?

Someone please help.

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If your colleague has been harmed they will report it. 
I know it is hard but you have to remind yourself that because you have OCD you are going to have thoughts like this that cause anxiety but aren’t real. You need to keep treating them as unimportant (because they are). 
Going to the police will not help. Treating this as OCD will. 

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Okay thank you @PolarBear and @dksea. I am thankful to you for your replies. I am trying to sit with the anxiety as you advise on other forums. 

I have two questions -

Is it OCD that one cannot differentiate between thought and reality?

Would anyone also be able to recommend where I can learn CBT techniques step by step online (like a course)?

Thank you.

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Can someone tell me if there is any online therapy treatment available specifically for OCD from the UK? I read on one of the threads that @Ashley can know someone as it therapy helped him. 

I would like to know if I can have therapy sessions online?

Thanks.

 

 

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@PolarBear @dksea  @gingerbreadgirl @taurean given your experience - can you please tell me if there is any trick to understanding a thought as just as a thought and not reality? As in any way of knowing xyz thing was only a thought you were thinking of and something for its real existence?

Any particular 3 step rule to differentiating between thoughts and reality?

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Hi Pranjali

Unfortunately there is no rule for this because you cannot be certain of it.  That is the trick.  You have to take a leap of faith without being sure.  With OCD you have to put the cart before the horse - you have to take a leap of faith and treat it as a thought without being sure. That is what makes OCD so tricky to treat (but not impossible). There is a reason why OCD is called the doubting disease.  if you didn't have doubt then you wouldn't have a problem.   You can't be sure it is OCD - not 100% - none of us can.  You just have to think "OK I will treat this like OCD and see what happens". Your search for certainty on this issue is a  big compulsion. 

We can't tell you any trick because there isn't one.  If there was we would all be doing it. 

That said - there is a rule of thumb which says "if you think it might be OCD, then it probably is". That is a good rule of thumb to go by.  

Edited by gingerbreadgirl
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Okay that is an insight in itself I must say. Because all this while I have been trying to differentiate between a thought and reality. 

I know I have asked this before - but then so often this feels like you are lying to yourself if you don't find out? How to approach that bit?

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3 minutes ago, Pranjali said:

Okay that is an insight in itself I must say. Because all this while I have been trying to differentiate between a thought and reality. 

I know I have asked this before - but then so often this feels like you are lying to yourself if you don't find out? How to approach that bit?

Like I say you have to take a leap of faith. You can't be completely sure you're not lying to yourself etc. You just have to treat it like that in blind faith.  Things only become clear later - the gnawing anxiety will fade and you can see it for what it is. But you have to put the cart before the horse. Accept that you will feel doubt. If you didn't feel doubt then you wouldn't have a problem. You can't do anything to make that doubt go away right now - and the more you try, the more doubt you will feel. You have to take a leap of faith and trust that you will get more clarity later. It can't ever work the other way round. 

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A good rule of thumb is:  If you think it MIGHT be OCD, it probably is.
As GBG said, the thing is you can't wait until you are sure, the whole problem of OCD is doubt/uncertainty.  If you could just be sure, then you wouldn't have OCD to begin with.

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Ok. So one does not know if they are only thoughts.

What is the difference between an OCD sufferer and non OCD sufferer?

What I mean to ask is - 

1) an intrusive thought is a random thought (not connected to anything)which is random, sudden, distressing and intrusive?

OR

2) an intrusive thought is a thought/feeling which one feels after an instance? Anxiety caused by that instance?

What is an intrusive thought? Is it like a random idea or an idea that follows an instance?

Thankful if someone could clarify.

Thank you.

 

 

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An intrusive thought is an unwanted thought. Often they cause distress and for people with OCD they can be difficult to move on from. 
 

The possible sources of an intrusive thought are the same as an un-intrusive one. It might be something you can relate to a specific incident, it might be something that seems totally random. (Though it’s quite possible that it’s not so much random as you simply weren’t conscious of the inputs that caused that particular thought to surface, but that’s not an important topic for today). 
 

The only difference between an OCD sufferer and a non-sufferer is the ability for such thoughts to get “stuck”. Non-sufferers can (and do) have the same types of thoughts. In their case it’s much easier to dismiss them and move on. They apply logic/reasoning and get relief.

Possible intrusive thought: “What if I went crazy and murdered my whole family!”

Non-OCD Response (Assuming they even notice the thought) “Well that’s ridiculous, I love my family.” Moves on with their life

OCD Response: “Well that’s ridiculous. Isn’t it? I mean why do I feel anxious if it’s ridiculous. Does that mean maybe deep down I want to do it? Is that the REAL me? Surely I wouldn’t have this kind of thought if I didn’t want to do it at least a little. I must avoid being alone with my family just in case...” etc etc etc

Same thought, vastly different response. 
 

How do you KNOW a thought is just OCD? You possibly don’t. So you go by the guideline. If you think it MIGHT be OCD, it probably is. Generally in my experience if the thoughts aren’t related to OCD, I don’t wonder if they are. I don’t feel doubt. So when I do feel doubt?  Probably OCD. Even if I can’t prove it 100% the right thing to do is just treat it like OCD. 

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