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Dear all,

Things are going OK at the moment. I am trying my best to avoid all compulsions.

I am wondering however how to overcome this hurdle concerning faeces, well in particular, it's because I am not sure if what I had was a dream or reality.

The fact is, last night, I either dreamt or did pull what would be considered a wedgie outside of my backside. I am sorry for the graphic detail (kind of humorous). The kicker was that I actually had a bit of an upset stomach so the chances are that my underwear could have well been slightly soiled...I mean, I didn't check but you know, there is the possibility. As gross as this is, the problem is IF I did do what I thought, then I literally have stuff over everything in my room that I touched today. To actually go about wiping everything would be a fools errand and the idea of touching nothing is probably equally as one. In truth, the only thing I think I can do is just get on with things but I really don't know and it is making me panic a little. Also, to be honest, I smelled my hands multiple times this morning and they smelled ok, so maybe it was my imagination. 

I'm pretty bitter as things have been OK up till this point so it would be good to nip this in the bud.

Best,

Big Dave

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You said there's stuff all over your room. Faulty OCD thinking. It's simply not true. That's what part of your brain wants you to believe but you can choose to ignore it.

I mean, come on. You're an average guy. You aren't covered in poop from head to toe. You aren't more poop susceptible than anyone else.

By the way, stop smelling your fingers. It's a compulsion.

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Ok so I am starting to struggle again. Tonight, I was washing my hands and some water went down the side of the sink onto some sprays and toilet cleaners etc. The problem is that area is an area that frequently gets soaked by my brother with urine. I’m thinking that some water was bound to have bounced off and hit me. But anyway I’ve gone back to my room anyway. I feel like rubbish but I figure it is the right thing to do. I probably have just contaminated the whole of my room badly though. So I’m feeling really low. 

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3 hours ago, BigDave said:

Ok so I am starting to struggle again. Tonight, I was washing my hands and some water went down the side of the sink onto some sprays and toilet cleaners etc. The problem is that area is an area that frequently gets soaked by my brother with urine. I’m thinking that some water was bound to have bounced off and hit me.

This is not the problem.  The problem is going in to these detailed analysis of minor situations that basically no non-sufferer (and many sufferers) would do.  
 

4 hours ago, BigDave said:

But anyway I’ve gone back to my room anyway. I feel like rubbish but I figure it is the right thing to do.

It is the right thing to do, to act as if this OCD lie isn't real (because it isn't).
 

4 hours ago, BigDave said:

I probably have just contaminated the whole of my room badly though. So I’m feeling really low. 

This idea you have of "contamination" isn't real, you need to recognize that.
Is it possible there were particulates of urine still present? Sure.
Is it possible some of them got on you due to a single splash of water? Possible, yes
Does that matter?  No, it REALLY doesn't.  The world is not completely sterile.  It never has been.  It never will be.  But it doesn't need to be.  And these events you fear are not spreading any kind of ACTUAL contamination.  OCD is LYING to you when it makes you feel like this is important, like this worry matters.  its not important, it doesn't matter.  You need to start choosing to believe that.  You need to start saying things like "contamination? meh, whatever" and do your best to live your life anyway.

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Reading this is like looking into my own head- if it provides any comfort, you aren’t alone. I completely get how frustrating/devastating it is when you feel like especially all your things and room are contaminated, feels like there’s no end and no fix. I’m doing my best to ignore pretty much the exact same thing of wanting to wipe everything but it’s exhausting and never ending and will only last till the next ‘mistake’. Let’s be brave and stick a middle finger up to ocd because it’s just robbing you of any time to do something you enjoy, OCD is a manipulative liar- keep repeating that and stay strong!

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Also it’s the extremely high standards we set ourselves that causes this cycle- at one time I shared things with others and had people touching my things not knowing when they’d last washed their hands etc. For me my room and things are now almost some sacred safe space that has to be sterile and that’s the trap, because now I can’t tolerate anything less. Interestingly in a situation like yours I feel less anxiety touching things or being in other rooms that aren’t mine. The longer we keep things sterile the more impossible it’ll become. Maybe it would help to try think of things you’ve done in the past like staying over at a friends or being in someone else’s space and surviving that, no germs killed you! Ocd is unhelpful perfectionism which is impossible to achieve

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On 20/01/2020 at 15:18, PolarBear said:

You said there's stuff all over your room. Faulty OCD thinking. It's simply not true. 

 

Not true again. Scientists tested surfaces around the bathroom & found they have bacteria from feces on them. That science is called Toilet Plumes. When a toilet is flushed a plume of whatever was in it lands on nearby surfaces. Look it up before you post things. 

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7 hours ago, Handy said:

Not true again. Scientists tested surfaces around the bathroom & found they have bacteria from feces on them. That science is called Toilet Plumes. When a toilet is flushed a plume of whatever was in it lands on nearby surfaces. Look it up before you post things. 

And?  No one is saying bacteria don't exist.  No one is saying toilet plumes don't exist.  We are saying the overexagreated "contamination" doesn't exist, that the level of danger is not real.  Most people (particularly non-OCD people) interact with their rooms, their houses, their work places, etc. without worrying about this "contamination" every day.  Why?  Because the level of risk is not what people like BigDave fear it is.  And it is virtually impossible to live in an environment that would meet the unrealistic demands OCD places on people.

So, again, what PB said is absolutely true, the "contamination" does not exist, the level of risk is not real.  Use the toilet? Wash your hands.  Move on with your life.  Get a drip of urine on you? Think "eww" for a split second, move on, live your life.  Anything else is not worth the effort or the anxiety.  Feeding peoples fears is irresponsible.  Don't be that guy.

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