Not doing well. Responsibility and guilt

[Terriblethoughts]

Sorry I’m not sure if this is an ocd issue or not so if it isn’t I’m sorry for posting here. 

I went on reddit a while back and was looking at a suicide forum and I thought “would a decent person go to the police and report this so they can maybe find and save these people?” I ended up not doing anything and forgot about it probably because I’ve been so focused on my obsessions but I thought of it a couple days ago and visited a forum again. 

I felt guilty but I put off asking about this because I was occupied with other obsessions and was afraid to ask. Also I can’t remember if this is a false memory or not but I remember one person who no one responded to and I was thinking I should make an account and respond if I was a decent person. A decent person wouldn’t mind taking 30 minutes to make an account and send a message before going to bed right? I guess I figured someone else would probably respond as it seemed to be an active forum. 

Even if I haven’t done anything wrong by not reporting it, just the fact I put off asking about it for so long kind of proves I’m not a good person. If I thought that it was something important I should’ve asked right away. I personally probably wouldn’t want people to report it but then I’m not in a situation to say what the right thing to do there is for multiple reasons. 

This has also brought back a memory of a conversation I had with someone about a year or two ago who was suicidal. Should I have reported that? Should I still report it if I can go and find the messages? I remember I tried to help them and I don’t remember if they said they would do it or not. I don’t know who they are either.

This keeps bringing back more memories. A couple months ago I talked to a stranger online on a suicide thing and I can’t remember if they said they were suicidal or not. I seem to have a memory of them saying they weren’t even but I don’t know. Is it my responsibility to report this as well? I don’t know who they are and don’t remember exactly when I talked to them and the chat isn’t saved or anything. But maybe there’s a small chance that something could be done.

I’m overwhelmed with this all and I don’t know what to do now. Should I be feeling guilty and responsible? Is it my responsibility to do something or is it ocd making me feel like it is? Any help is really appreciated and I’m sorry for being a terrible person and sorry for posting here. Also if you’re wondering or worried why I was on a suicide forum don’t worry I promise I’m not going to do anything.

[paradoxer]

Sorry for being a 'terrible person'? TT there's your clue. I hope no one here offers any reassurance.

Best.