Advice

[NinjaSloth27]

Hi Guys,

I haven’t really posted on one of these before so I apologise if I’ve got the wrong idea.

I am currently undergoing therapy for OCD, and whilst I have managed to get control over my compulsive resetting behaviour, I still have these horrible intrusive thoughts about my girlfriend with another man. I know I shouldn’t be embarrassed by it but I’m kinda terrified to speak to my therapist about it as I find it humiliating and I was wondering if anybody has been in a similar situation and could help me? 
 

Thanks in Advance x

Edited March 27, 2020 by NinjaSloth27

[Ashley]

3 hours ago, NinjaSloth27 said:

I know I shouldn’t be embarrassed by it but I’m kinda terrified to speak to my therapist about it as I find it humiliating and I was wondering if anybody has been in a similar situation and could help me? 

Hello there NinjaSloth,

Although I have not personally had that exact intrusive thought that embarrassed me, I have had plenty of other OCD thoughts that left me red faced and like you I didn't divulge when seeking help, well not at first.  If it helps, I have read/spoke to others with very similar intrusive thoughts to what you describe there.  

So a couple of ways to approach this.  Firstly though I am sure the therapist will have heard similar and much more embarrassing stories, so try and take comfort from that.   But couple of ideas:

• If you can't say it in person how would you feel telling your therapist about this in writing or even record a video and email to them before your next session?

• Sometimes I advise people or I have people on the helpline nit quite able to say it, they lead up to it in conversation, like 'I am having intrusive thought about my girlfriend', they then tend to stop there and if they don't volunteer more I try and help them by asking the right questions at the right time, for example 'do you mean in a violent or sexual way NinjaSloth', that's usually enough for the caller to realise I understand OCD and they tend to open up more. Obviously some people need a little more leading with appropriate questions than others.  What I do tell people asking me how they should open up, is if you're little snippets are met with blank facial expressions and poor questions that suggest a lack of understanding it might be worth leaving it for now and reviewing if this therapist is right to help you and if you might need to refer to another more OCD knowledgeable therapist (which is not ideal, but sometimes is needed).

It is important that you find a way to communicate though, because we have to give the therapist a chance to help us address this  

Ashley.