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My mind is Catastrophising


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Hi, I hope you are all doing okay.

So for a few months I have had problems with my eyes (I wont go into detail) and obviously haven't really been able to address any of them with a professional becuz of the current sit. and it has caused me massive anxiety.

I have now booked an eye test because it hasnt gone away and despite my want to just shut it out my mind, I knew I had to do it. Of course my ocd has been worrying and catastrophising terribly around this like having thoughts about all the worst possible things it could be but I knew that if I searched it online it would make me even more anxious.

I am kinda ashamed because today I googled my problems and they were all linked to either older people or worse issues that could lead to loss of sight and (baring in mind that i am still young) to say that my thoughts are racing now is an understatement. 

I know I shouldn't have done it and I am kind of angry with myself for searching it but the urge was so strong. If anyone has any help or advice in dealing with uncertainty I would appreciate it greatly. 

I just feel like am extra anxious anyway recently and my ocd has definitely sky rocketed despite doing my best to not engage with it. 

Thank you x

 

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Lots of people Google symptoms and would be tempted to. It's just harder for us because our OCD makes us react differently. We think it must be true because we read it, it is our reaction that is the problem. We can't read it and be objective. I make the mistake of googling symptoms sometimes but then I tell myself Google presents every scenario for millions of people ,it doesn't mean it's certain to us.

You have booked an eye test which is a practical step, so well done. I try not to Google but if I slip up and do I just try and think I'm arming myself with a bit more background knowledge rather than assuming I have everything on there.

I hope this helps, see the worry as OCD and know you are doing something practical. I have been there many times.

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