Llb93 Posted October 16, 2020 Share Posted October 16, 2020 Hi, Pretty much all of my ocd revolves around concerns that I’m a bad person. I flared with it about two weeks ago and I’m still not feeling good but I’m functioning a bit better. my thought process at the moment sort of goes like this. I’ll reassure myself of something, then I’ll get over it and then my brain will say ‘yeah but what about this’ then panic ensues and I’m off to ruminating about something else. In addition to this, it feels like half of my thoughts are real but they are either being altered by OCD or false memories are being filled in as I try to fill in the gaps. It feels like I don’t really know what reality is anymore. At the moment, I’m going through this maybe three times a day? Like as soon as I feel calm about something I’ll get 20 minutes of normality and then my mind will say ‘yes but remember when you did this?’ (Or did I?) and then I get stuck in the loop again. It’s hard to fully dismiss the thoughts because I know some of them may be rooted in reality so it feels like I’m realistically piecing it altogether. Is this expected in OCD? I’m exhausted! Link to comment
PolarBear Posted October 16, 2020 Share Posted October 16, 2020 Well, you just described OCD. You get a thought, often like a question. Remember when you did this? That's the obsession. The obsession causes you distress. In response, you ruminate. That's a compulsion. Obsession + distress + compulsion = OCD. It's really that simple. Of course it's hard to ignore the obsessions. If it wasn't hard you wouldn't have a disorder. Link to comment
Llb93 Posted October 16, 2020 Author Share Posted October 16, 2020 Thank you, is it normal to sometimes get three or four different thoughts a day? I don’t get just one, I’ll get another one and then another one will come in within the next hour or so. Link to comment
PolarBear Posted October 16, 2020 Share Posted October 16, 2020 Nothing unusual about that. At my peak I estimated I was getting well over 100 obsessions per day. Link to comment
Llb93 Posted October 16, 2020 Author Share Posted October 16, 2020 Thank you, that’s the thing for me, when I’m like this I have so many thoughts swirling in my mind one after the other...I’m sure many of them are false or warped in some way. But it all sort of comes at once. Then when I’m out of it all I will get the odd thought every so often and just dismiss it. Link to comment
Armadillo22 Posted October 17, 2020 Share Posted October 17, 2020 Yeah all very common in people with OCD. 3 or 4 per day you say? It's pretty common for people to get much more than that. I'd say people experience OCD in different ways, be it a common theme vs many themes, a single thought vs multiple thoughts. Even asking yourself the question 'is this normal?' (I have a post with this exact question) is asking for trouble. 'Is this normal?' is simply another doubt which is better left alone if it's something you're asking yourself often. But in answer to you question, yes, completely normal. Link to comment
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