My ocd is taking over

[Courtney]

Hello, I’ve just only recently signed up and I’m not quite sure how this works but any help and advice will be much appreciated. I’ve had OCD since my early teens, the past 6 months I have really struggled to control it and I feel so trapped in my own head! I don’t know what to do, I’ve contacted my doctor but they just offer me medication which I’ve done before and do not want to do again. I’ve been on a waiting list for cbt for 5 months now and I’m really struggling, I spend most the day battling with my OCD and I’m tired! I’m a mother to a beautiful little girl who is 7 and I work and I’m also doing my nurse training and I can’t focus! I hate it so much, I feel as if it’s taken over my life, I’m to scared to not do it incase my partner cheats or something bad happens to my family, which deep down I know is completely irrational and my compulsions can not control any of this! I don’t know what to do but I’m so low and I can’t continue to cry around my family, friends and in work I’m frustration! The compulsion no longer make the anxiety go away! Any suggestions on what may help?

 

tia xx

[PolarBear]

Hi there.

You said you spend most of your time battling your OCD. And it's not working. Your anxiety isn't going away.

So what if you stop battling? What if you stop fighting? What if you just leave the thoughts alone?

At the very least you'll save all that energy you spent battling. In fact, this is the way out of OCD.

[Courtney]

1 hour ago, PolarBear said:

Hi there.

You said you spend most of your time battling your OCD. And it's not working. Your anxiety isn't going away.

So what if you stop battling? What if you stop fighting? What if you just leave the thoughts alone?

At the very least you'll save all that energy you spent battling. In fact, this is the way out of OCD.

If only it was that easy to just stop, it’s almost like I don’t know how to stop or even have control over anything at the moment without my OCD taking over! I just want it to go away! I do try all the time to not do it and to not give in but my heart starts racing and the panic kicks in.

[BigDave]

15 minutes ago, Courtney said:

If only it was that easy to just stop, it’s almost like I don’t know how to stop or even have control over anything at the moment without my OCD taking over! I just want it to go away! I do try all the time to not do it and to not give in but my heart starts racing and the panic kicks in.

Courtney, I know how you're feeling. If it was only so easy to bat away those thoughts and just be like, meh, you know. It's next to impossible I find. I guess the truth is though is that there isn't an easy way out of it and that you have to do something or you're just going to be entrenched in it. I am still trying to figure out what to do myself but I believe that you can do it. If you can be a nurse, then you can do anything!

[Courtney]

4 minutes ago, BigDave said:

Courtney, I know how you're feeling. If it was only so easy to bat away those thoughts and just be like, meh, you know. It's next to impossible I find. I guess the truth is though is that there isn't an easy way out of it and that you have to do something or you're just going to be entrenched in it. I am still trying to figure out what to do myself but I believe that you can do it. If you can be a nurse, then you can do anything!

It’s crazy! Because when having a conversation about it or explaining it to someone I know it’s completely irrational and no matter how many times a flick a light switch or wash my hands it will not change a single thing! So why can’t I just not do! I know I don’t need to deep down but in that moment of pure anxiety, I lose all realisation! I feel like I’m mental sometimes or that people around me must think I am, because explaining to someone else that if I flick this switch 3 times my family will be fine makes no sense at all but at the time seems the only way x

[PolarBear]

23 minutes ago, Courtney said:

If only it was that easy to just stop, it’s almost like I don’t know how to stop or even have control over anything at the moment without my OCD taking over! I just want it to go away! I do try all the time to not do it and to not give in but my heart starts racing and the panic kicks in.

Oh, it's not easy to stop. You have to try, try and try again. It takes practice to get it right.

[Courtney]

2 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

Oh, it's not easy to stop. You have to try, try and try again. It takes practice to get it right.

I hope you don’t mind me asking, but what, if anything puts you at ease when your in that state of anxiety?

[PolarBear]

You have to accept the anxiety. At first it's not easy. Sufferers hate anxiety and will do anything (compulsions) to get rid of it.

But you can learn that anxiety goes down on its own. And the more you leave the thoughts alone, the less anxiety arises.