Instagram pocd?

[Ironborn]

Hi all. 

 

For a while now I've had this unhealthy habit of scrolling trough instagram and checking pictures and videos of woman/girls that dance in a sexy way. Or any other material that is aexually provoking. Now during the scrolling I began to wonder if none om those woman / girls are under age, and i checked the min age required and it is set to 13!

This scared the hell out of me and I now am certain I must have seen some videos or pocs from woman that are under 18 aswell and me still getting turned on from those pic's. Lately I've been questioning the age of some of these woman but never took action. And now after some time I did verify the min age req and I feel as if I've deliberately not looked it up so I could keep watching underaged woman dance, in bikini or anything else sexual provocative. 

What do I do now? 

I feel so bad for this. I'm going to delete my instagram. But that won't fix what I've done. 

 

 

[njb]

Hi. Instagram or anything else it's all the same. Been there done it. Remember that there is a big difference in context. It is very simple for someone to look very different in front of a camera and in real life. I'm same. Spent years stressing about this stuff. I think we see something as attractive and attracted to and then freak as we can't contexualise that its not someone in our usual age appropriate bracket. We try to by compulsion and watching again and ruminating. Well I do. I used to be able to shrug off and simply go oops got that wrong and when could see someone was actually younger still see the attractiveness but not the attracted to anymore. I feel for you. Try not to stress. Not sure deleting Instagram will help but avoiding researching it will. Social media is not the issue. It's our reactions. 

Try to chill. You've not done anything wrong and certainly I think your reaction is same as most people except we create a disaster scenario. Good luck and remember it is all ocd messing with your head. Even thinking over it all will be a big fat lie.

[Ironborn]

9 hours ago, njb said:

Hi. Instagram or anything else it's all the same. Been there done it. Remember that there is a big difference in context. It is very simple for someone to look very different in front of a camera and in real life. I'm same. Spent years stressing about this stuff. I think we see something as attractive and attracted to and then freak as we can't contexualise that its not someone in our usual age appropriate bracket. We try to by compulsion and watching again and ruminating. Well I do. I used to be able to shrug off and simply go oops got that wrong and when could see someone was actually younger still see the attractiveness but not the attracted to anymore. I feel for you. Try not to stress. Not sure deleting Instagram will help but avoiding researching it will. Social media is not the issue. It's our reactions. 

Try to chill. You've not done anything wrong and certainly I think your reaction is same as most people except we create a disaster scenario. Good luck and remember it is all ocd messing with your head. Even thinking over it all will be a big fat lie.

but how can i move on from this without knowing for sure?

[njb]

There's the horrid power of ocd. It's what gives us that soul wrenching sickness that we have to attend to. I don't know the answer. I know it's all a battle of identity. What I do know is that if you had context you'd still stress but you'd be able to be in touch with you before viewing such stuff. We don't wait to see a whole tiger before deciding it's a tiger. I know it is all consuming and I'm there right now. Your heart is in the right place. You can't be sure. Ever. Truth is your ocd will cloud stuff even if you were sure. If someone e said to me here are clips of 13 yr olds dancing sexily you think I'd be cool, nope. I suspect a loy of people would feel uncomfortable but they dont have feeling reaction like someone with a mental illness. That's the power over us. We think like everyone else but some things hit our reactor and we lose it. We're normal uncomfortable x 1000000000. Try to relable it as ocd and move on. You can't be sure either way. It's like trying to solve an impossible puzzle. Point is there is no need.