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Hi everyone x


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Hi everyone.

How are you all doing? Been thinking of you all lately and about all the wonderful help you have given me over the years. Just wanted to check in really and say hi. Its been a tough old year (in more ways than one) but we crack on as best we know how.

Much love x

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Hi Saz,

I’m struggling a bit at the moment and don’t know how this has happened. I was doing so well and wish to be there again. I cannot seem to shake the thoughts from my head. When I’m well they aren’t even there but now I keep thinking have I don’t wrong to my child in some form and it’s eating me up inside. 

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Hey, its so lovely to hear back from you guys, I've missed you! 

So sorry to hear you're not feeling the best Nikki, sounds like its just a little blip and that you have been doing well. Just try to ride it out and obviously reach out on here if need be. You will be ok x

I am doing ok despite all the madness of the lockdown. I've come a long way compared to how I was. I mostly seem to have a handle on things/worries/thoughts etc. I do have the odd wobble but then I guess that's to be expected. I just try to tell the thoughts to go away. This lockdown has made me a little more anxious than normal (I hate the lockdown and feel suffocated and feel we should be a to live our lives) but just trying to take one day at a time as im sure most of us are. I've also gone through a horrible breakup in the Summer from a long term relationship, completely out the blue, I was discarded like a piece of trash, so that was very difficult and I'm only just feeling ok from that. I've since had time to reflect and realise that this person was a bit of a narcissist and actually I ignored a lot of red flags in the beginning that I shouldn't have. 

Anyways, aside from all that I am actually ok. I feel quite strong and I'm focusing on my health, my kids, myself and last night I decided to come off my Instagram and Facebook. I thought if I can stay off that in a time like this then I'm stronger than I think I am. Dont get me wrong I may go back on it but a break is a good thing sometimes. 

How are all you guys? Hope everyone is doing ok in these extremely difficult times x.

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On 23/01/2021 at 10:19, Saz said:

 I am actually ok. I feel quite strong and I'm focusing on my health, my kids, myself and last night I decided to come off my Instagram and Facebook. I thought if I can stay off that in a time like this then I'm stronger than I think I am.

Yay! :clap::thumbup:

It's wonderful to hear you're doing ok, Saz, and feeling so strong. Way to go!

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Awww thank you all so much!

You will have to bare with me if I take a little longer to reply. I dont seem to have enough hours in the day at the moment! 

I do feel stronger. I think the only way forward with ocd and everything that comes with it is to literally ignore it (as best you can) and to genuinely immerse yourself into life (very hard at the moment I know). I found that by doing this, I naturally weaned myself off the thoughts. I am by no means saying I'm free, and if I allow myself enough time to think about it all again then I could easily slip back down that horrific rabbit hole, but I don't want to be exhausted any more, I need to be strong for myself and my kids. 

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason or a purpose. I've since noticed that 3 out of 4 of my kids are showing signs of ocd, which I'm gutted about, but maybe I had to go through my experience so I could help them and advise them... Its just little things I've noticed with them and I'm hoping it does fade away but I'm keeping an eye on it and I am armed with lots of knowledge thanks to you guys.

Once again, its been so lovely to hear back from you all. Hope everyone is being kind to themselves x

Edited by Saz
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