Advice on CBT

[Doc]

Hi guys,
 

I started 2021 with relapse of symptoms and I am going to have my 3rd CBT session on next week. 
 

Last week I  felt really upset after work because I was doing exposure work. My therapist is only there for me when we are doing sessions, and she hardly ever responds to a text or call if called out of these sessions. I sent her a message and told her I’m very sad, and she didn’t even reply. I perfectly understand if she has lots of clients, but a text message even within 24 hours won’t hurt, you can find a minute in your busy schedule!

Am I asking for too much? 

Should she be there for me? 
 

I just don’t know and would benefit with support at the start of treatment until I get used to the idea of CBT.

 

Please let me know and thanks for the support

 

cheers

[Ashley]

Hi Doc, I am not sure you will like my response, but I will give you my thoughts and it's said in a way to help you    I assume your therapist is private, rather than NHS?

 

10 minutes ago, Doc said:

Am I asking for too much? 

If I am honest, yes.    

13 minutes ago, Doc said:

Should she be there for me? 

Not between sessions in the way you are describing above.   That's not to say a therapist should not care and occasionally check in, but technically is not expected to be part of their duty.

Even if you are paying the therapist, you are technically only paying for their time in session usually.  But more than that, I am not sure how healthy it would be for a therapist to respond between sessions, there's a huge risk of reliance taking over.  I was asked to review a guide for therapists recently and I actually advised they edit it to suggest for their own well-being they have a separate work phone which is switched off when not working.

The idea of therapy is to teach us, the sufferer, to become our own therapist, and not need to rely on compulsions or other people. So that's something you do need to work towards during sessions is not having a need to want a response from the therapist (or others) between.  Perhaps in some small way, that's what we can be there for each other to help each other between sessions.

 

[Doc]

That’s fine. I just wanted to know if it’s normal to get this support or not  thanks