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Hi! Please may I ask if anyone can recommend a good resource tackling Pure OCD.  I have only recently become aware of this disorder in my friend and would really like to be able to help and support her struggles with it as it can be quite terrifying for her.  I'm finding it difficult to determine how she is feeling since she internalises her thoughts and her strategy doesn't appear to want to ask for help.  Thankfully, my friend is receiving professional help, but would be such an advantage to understand how it all works so I can step in when she might genuinely need me.  Thank you!

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Hello and :welcome:

It's good to hear that you want to support your friend and take the time to learn about this condition.

Firstly, the term "Pure O" isn't one that we use or recommend.  It translates as meaning "Purely Obsessional" and this isn't accurate, where there are intrusive obsessions there are always compulsions.  Compulsions being an action that we take in order to reduce the anxiety.  In fairness, I think society has used the term to denote a situation where a sufferer experiences intrusive thoughts like fearing they may harm someone, that they are a paedophile as opposed to the more commonly known types like contamination or checking, where someone might endlessly clean, check doors, locks etc.  In both types it involves intrusive thoughts, thoughts that loved ones may get sick & die or the house may burn down or that the sufferer might harm others if they lost control, went mad etc.  In both situations they will always carry out compulsions.  Compulsions are referred to as Overt & Covert....obvious physical ones like cleaning, tapping, checking or ones that are not so obvious.  These may take the form of researching things on the internet, asking others for reassurance, avoidance, thinking neutralising thoughts or phrases to name but a few but you can rest assured, they'll exist.

It's important that friends and family understand how compulsions underpin the problem.  It's easy to fall into what they think is helpful and supportive behaviour when if fact they are often colluding with the sufferer in carrying out compulsions.

I don't know how much your friend has shared with you or how you found out.  Having horrendous thoughts is dreadfully frightening and often, embarrassing for the sufferer to share.  Everyone is very different but in my own case, I have never disclosed or discussed my thoughts with friends or family.  You have to respect that wish if that is their choice.

Learning about the condition, how it manifests, the role of compulsions, common errors made in support are all things that will help you to help her.  Offering constant reassurance (which sufferers crave) is very damaging.  You can learn an awful lot from reading the OCD-UK's main website which can be found HERE  Also reading the forums can help you to see how difficult OCD can be and what a vast range of ways it affects people.  There are many excellent books available, Break Free from OCD - Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder & Pulling The Trigger are both very good.

Hope that helps a bit but feel free to ask any questions you have :)

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Hey there, 

My boyfriend has pure ‘O ‘ocd he also has problems with retrograde jealously which is linked to OCD. It sounds like your partner had soimlar issues. I know it's advised not to discuss your past relationships. Also know that you have done nothing wrong, its not about you, but about their insecurity. I suspect your partner has some form of insecure attachment issues, likely disorganised. His present fears are that you will abandon him, for favour of your past relationships. This obsessive and irrational fear is driving the behaviour in a cyclical fashion. Read all you can and advise him to get help to break the cycle of obsessive thoughts. 

Sending love & strength.

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3 hours ago, Lionqueen91 said:

Hey there, 

My boyfriend has pure ‘O ‘ocd he also has problems with retrograde jealously which is linked to OCD. It sounds like your partner had soimlar issues. I know it's advised not to discuss your past relationships. Also know that you have done nothing wrong, its not about you, but about their insecurity. I suspect your partner has some form of insecure attachment issues, likely disorganised. His present fears are that you will abandon him, for favour of your past relationships. This obsessive and irrational fear is driving the behaviour in a cyclical fashion. Read all you can and advise him to get help to break the cycle of obsessive thoughts. 

Sending love & strength.

I think you've got mixed up between threads.  Rachelle is just wanting general help to support a friend but Thank You :)

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