Does anyone have any tips for coping with OCD when moving house?

[BelAnna]

We've just got the house on the market and it's already affecting my OCD quite a lot! 

We have a lot of house viewers coming this week and I'm terrified that one of them will bring Norovirus or Covid; as both are at high rates at the moment. I'm double vaccinated so more worried about Noro really, as (as most forum regulars know) it's my main contamination fear and I am absolutely terrified of vomit/ing. 

The house that's being sold is my parent's house/family home but I've been suffering from agoraphobia with my OCD for a few years so having moved out at 19, I moved back with them several years later and have hardly left the house since.

I've found tidying and cleaning the house really stressful in itself as cleaning is very difficult with contamination OCD and now I've got to cope with people traipsing around the house (potentially walking stuff [dog poo/vomit] from my streets into my bedroom). Then if we accept an offer there will be so much that I will have a difficult time with (from leaving our house, which I still love; to coping with removal men handling my possessions; to coping with the new house potentially not being clean when we get there. I'm honestly dreading it. At the risk of catastrophising there's also likely to be a Norovirus epidemic this Winter, which will just make everything much more difficult. 

We're going to be moving closer to the coast and to my brother's family so I need to focus on some positives but honestly it might well be a very difficult 6+ months  . 

Has anyone on the forum been through similar recently?

 

Edited July 27, 2021 by BelAnna

[Caramoole]

What do you feel it will take to make you ready to change how you deal with this Belanna?  Realistically, this is going to be a tough time for you because you are where you are and are processing this in the way that you've got used to doing.  Recently, GBG mentioned that she thought you paid lip service to any advice but didn't make any changes.  I'd agree with this.  You are always very polite, you acknowledge the advice and thank people for it but then don't make many adjustments.  What is it that's causing this resistance to change?  You manage your life by attempting to control surroundings and circumstances.  You get through enforced situations by gritting your teeth and enduring a given situation.  But what about real change so that in the future you're not looking to prevent infections, to control your environment and others?  What's preventing this change?

[BelAnna]

28 minutes ago, Caramoole said:

What do you feel it will take to make you ready to change how you deal with this Belanna?  Realistically, this is going to be a tough time for you because you are where you are and are processing this in the way that you've got used to doing.  Recently, GBG mentioned that she thought you paid lip service to any advice but didn't make any changes.  I'd agree with this.  You are always very polite, you acknowledge the advice and thank people for it but then don't make many adjustments.  What is it that's causing this resistance to change?  You manage your life by attempting to control surroundings and circumstances.  You get through enforced situations by gritting your teeth and enduring a given situation.  But what about real change so that in the future you're not looking to prevent infections, to control your environment and others?  What's preventing this change?

Thanks Caramoole.

I think some of this is true. However I have faced quite a lot of challenges recently and there have definitely been times when I have faced things that would be towards the upper end of my hierarchy. There are several other (completely unrelated) aspects of my OCD that I don't post about very often, which I have to contend with too, that sometimes take my focus away from tackling the contamination OCD. I've also had other OCD themes, which I've dealt with well over the years and are no longer a problem.

I think at its core I need to embrace the idea of catching Norovirus but the terror that vomit/ing causes me makes that incredibly difficult. I have gone through ERP for Emetophobia twice and each time I completed all of the tasks set for me but it didn't really help and I've also had EMDR for my Emetophobia. 

Obviously my reactions are also partly due to habit- I've had Emetophobia since I was 7 and OCD since I was 8- I find it difficult to know how to react to situations like a normal person. Just like with stopping smoking or losing weight- it's really difficult to break from my habitual ways of responding to things!

Edited July 27, 2021 by BelAnna

[OCD Hacks]

Try To Learn The ERP Therapy .
This Therapeutic Journal May Help You .
Be Strong.

[snowbear]

52 minutes ago, BelAnna said:

Thanks Caramoole.

I think some of this is true. However I have faced quite a lot of challenges recently and there have definitely been times when I have faced things that would be towards the upper end of my hierarchy. There are several other (completely unrelated) aspects of my OCD that I don't post about very often, which I have to contend with too, that sometimes take my focus away from tackling the contamination OCD. I've also had other OCD themes, which I've dealt with well over the years and are no longer a problem.

I think at its core I need to embrace the idea of catching Norovirus but the terror that vomit/ing causes me makes that incredibly difficult. I have gone through ERP for Emetophobia twice and each time I completed all of the tasks set for me but it didn't really help and I've also had EMDR for my Emetophobia. 

Obviously my reactions are also partly due to habit- I've had Emetophobia since I was 7 and OCD since I was 8- I find it difficult to know how to react to situations like a normal person. Just like with stopping smoking or losing weight- it's really difficult to break from my habitual ways of responding to things!

 

Absolutely no judgement from me.

It's just that I hear an echo of posts I was making 10-15 years ago. Full of 'excuses' about the complexity of my OCD, the severity of my PTSD, all the physical and mental challenges I'd already faced and overcome, all I had 'going on' that prevented me from grasping the nettle and going for it. Worst of it was Ashley, Caramoole and others saw right through it, but I believed everything I was telling myself! I refused to accept they were 'excuses'.

These days I'm totally honest about what's holding me back from overthrowing my OCD completely. Anybody asks I just say 'I'm not ready.'

I know what I need to be ready, and I'm 100% honest with myself about that too. I recognise the impossibility of some of my demands and how it's a choice between getting what I want to happen or living with OCD to my dying day. Some day I hope I'll be willing to compromise and break free from OCD once and for all.

I tell you this because I suspect somewhere in your head you're making similar impossble demands. Wanting the world to change instead of accepting that we have to change - or stay as we are, ruled by OCD.

I've made a bargain with myself on when I'm going to bite the bullet come what may. I live in excited anticipation and fearful dread of the day arriving. Meanwhile I make small steps of progress on changing myself bit by bit to fit in with the world instead of demanding the world change to suit me.

Would working on the cognitive side like this help you, BelAnna? You've done the ERP, EMDR etc and it doesn't seem to have moved you forward, so maybe it's time to set aside therapy for the OCD and the emetophobia and focus on therapy to help you change yourself from the inside out.

It's working for me anyway. I regularly get days now where I think I could overthrow the OCD without waiting for my deadline. One day the scales will tip that extra inch and I'll go for it.   But to be honest, that's not important any more!  I'm changing on the inside as a result of the cognitive work, positive psychology and mindfulness that I've done. I'm becoming a better, wiser person. I've discovered serenity and inner peace, found meaning in my life, become much more resilient and calmer in the face of a storm. If I had to go through another 50 years of OCD hell to achieve the insights I have now I'd accept the challenge in an instant! Being able/ ready to give up the OCD is just the icing on the cake.

Anyway, I just thought as we're quite alike in many ways you might find a change of approach away from trying to treat your emetophobia/OCD helpful too.

[Angst]

H Belanna

I am following a similar journey to you. A planned move had been delayed because of the virus.
 

 I have two recent valuations of my property and I plan to have two more. No doubt your family will have received advice from the estate agents on what needs doing at minimal cost and how to stage the property. Have your family started looking for a new property? Or already placed an offer on a property? Are you likely to be involved in a chain? Are you involved in much decision making regarding the move?

If I remember correctly, you do not take any medication. Perhaps now is the time to consider taking some. It might help cushion the experience.

Some estate agents market properties by staging open days when they channel prospective buyers into one viewing day which will concentrate visits on one particular day. Your property therefore needs to be only prepped for one day. If the property is properly priced for the market this technique can work. I am considering this.

I am also considering a few months holiday rental when a paint job is done on my property and then give the keys to estate agents to show people around the place.

 

[Caramoole]

How's about the challenge Belanna.....just to really making that decision to change things....maybe Snowbear can help with that.

I know you've faced lots of things lately, and I don't belittle that in any way but I still worry that you are perhaps enduring it and getting through (which takes some doing) rather than managing it in an effective way.

I was going to say I'm sorry for challenging you....but I'm not really (   ) but I'm not coming from a place of criticism, I've watched you over far too many years missing out on so much & going through such hard times.  I'd like to see you living your life, not just getting by and existing.  You've a lot to offer the world

[Caramoole]

https://www.amazon.co.uk/OCD-Anxiety-Related-Depression-Definitive-dp-1789561078/dp/1789561078/ref=dp_ob_title_bk

Have you ever read Pulling The Trigger?  I think it's quite a good book.  I find it preferable to Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  From memory it goes over quite a bit of CBT rather than just the A or B theory (which I find simplistic and unremarkable)

[OCD Hacks]

1 hour ago, snowbear said:

 

Absolutely no judgement from me.

It's just that I hear an echo of posts I was making 10-15 years ago. Full of 'excuses' about the complexity of my OCD, the severity of my PTSD, all the physical and mental challenges I'd already faced and overcome, all I had 'going on' that prevented me from grasping the nettle and going for it. Worst of it was Ashley, Caramoole and others saw right through it, but I believed everything I was telling myself! I refused to accept they were 'excuses'.

These days I'm totally honest about what's holding me back from overthrowing my OCD completely. Anybody asks I just say 'I'm not ready.'

I know what I need to be ready, and I'm 100% honest with myself about that too. I recognise the impossibility of some of my demands and how it's a choice between getting what I want to happen or living with OCD to my dying day. Some day I hope I'll be willing to compromise and break free from OCD once and for all.

I tell you this because I suspect somewhere in your head you're making similar impossble demands. Wanting the world to change instead of accepting that we have to change - or stay as we are, ruled by OCD.

I've made a bargain with myself on when I'm going to bite the bullet come what may. I live in excited anticipation and fearful dread of the day arriving. Meanwhile I make small steps of progress on changing myself bit by bit to fit in with the world instead of demanding the world change to suit me.

Would working on the cognitive side like this help you, BelAnna? You've done the ERP, EMDR etc and it doesn't seem to have moved you forward, so maybe it's time to set aside therapy for the OCD and the emetophobia and focus on therapy to help you change yourself from the inside out.

It's working for me anyway. I regularly get days now where I think I could overthrow the OCD without waiting for my deadline. One day the scales will tip that extra inch and I'll go for it.   But to be honest, that's not important any more!  I'm changing on the inside as a result of the cognitive work, positive psychology and mindfulness that I've done. I'm becoming a better, wiser person. I've discovered serenity and inner peace, found meaning in my life, become much more resilient and calmer in the face of a storm. If I had to go through another 50 years of OCD hell to achieve the insights I have now I'd accept the challenge in an instant! Being able/ ready to give up the OCD is just the icing on the cake.

Anyway, I just thought as we're quite alike in many ways you might find a change of approach away from trying to treat your emetophobia/OCD helpful too.

good work dude  !

[BelAnna]

3 hours ago, OCD Hacks said:

Try To Learn The ERP Therapy .
This Therapeutic Journal May Help You .
Be Strong.

Thanks OCDhacks.

 

2 hours ago, snowbear said:

 

Absolutely no judgement from me.

It's just that I hear an echo of posts I was making 10-15 years ago. Full of 'excuses' about the complexity of my OCD, the severity of my PTSD, all the physical and mental challenges I'd already faced and overcome, all I had 'going on' that prevented me from grasping the nettle and going for it. Worst of it was Ashley, Caramoole and others saw right through it, but I believed everything I was telling myself! I refused to accept they were 'excuses'.

These days I'm totally honest about what's holding me back from overthrowing my OCD completely. Anybody asks I just say 'I'm not ready.'

I know what I need to be ready, and I'm 100% honest with myself about that too. I recognise the impossibility of some of my demands and how it's a choice between getting what I want to happen or living with OCD to my dying day. Some day I hope I'll be willing to compromise and break free from OCD once and for all.

I tell you this because I suspect somewhere in your head you're making similar impossble demands. Wanting the world to change instead of accepting that we have to change - or stay as we are, ruled by OCD.

I've made a bargain with myself on when I'm going to bite the bullet come what may. I live in excited anticipation and fearful dread of the day arriving. Meanwhile I make small steps of progress on changing myself bit by bit to fit in with the world instead of demanding the world change to suit me.

Would working on the cognitive side like this help you, BelAnna? You've done the ERP, EMDR etc and it doesn't seem to have moved you forward, so maybe it's time to set aside therapy for the OCD and the emetophobia and focus on therapy to help you change yourself from the inside out.

It's working for me anyway. I regularly get days now where I think I could overthrow the OCD without waiting for my deadline. One day the scales will tip that extra inch and I'll go for it.   But to be honest, that's not important any more!  I'm changing on the inside as a result of the cognitive work, positive psychology and mindfulness that I've done. I'm becoming a better, wiser person. I've discovered serenity and inner peace, found meaning in my life, become much more resilient and calmer in the face of a storm. If I had to go through another 50 years of OCD hell to achieve the insights I have now I'd accept the challenge in an instant! Being able/ ready to give up the OCD is just the icing on the cake.

Anyway, I just thought as we're quite alike in many ways you might find a change of approach away from trying to treat your emetophobia/OCD helpful too.

Thank you Snowbear, that makes total sense! It's inspiring to hear that you're really dealing with your OCD even if there are some parts that you're not ready to tackle just yet. 

I hope that everything goes to plan when you give up all OCD behaviours! 

Maybe I need to spend some time thinking about how my life would be different if I dropped all of the compulsions/behaviours. I think part of me wonders whether my obsessive thoughts (particularly those not related to contamination/my phobia) would be just as awful or even get worse! 

It's lovely to hear that your journey through OCD has been worth it to get to the meaningful place that you are in now! 

2 hours ago, Caramoole said:

How's about the challenge Belanna.....just to really making that decision to change things....maybe Snowbear can help with that.

I know you've faced lots of things lately, and I don't belittle that in any way but I still worry that you are perhaps enduring it and getting through (which takes some doing) rather than managing it in an effective way.

I was going to say I'm sorry for challenging you....but I'm not really (   ) but I'm not coming from a place of criticism, I've watched you over far too many years missing out on so much & going through such hard times.  I'd like to see you living your life, not just getting by and existing.  You've a lot to offer the world

Thank you Caramoole!

I like constructive posts so no need to say sorry for challenging my OCD and you're right OCD has consumed my life for over 20 years.

Also I was giving what you said some more thought and actually it is a case of gritting my teeth and getting through things a lot of the time rather than embracing the change- for example when my brother and his family were staying we had (among lots of other impromptu exposures) a takeaway Indian meal one night. I was very worried about it especially as I once found a miniscule segment of raw chicken in a meal from the same restaurant in the past. We were fine- no-one got ill but I very much ate the take-away as an exception! My family have since suggested having takeaway pizza and I've made excuses and asked them to buy frozen pizza instead. I guess I need to deliberately choose options, which I believe involve a risk of Norovirus or food poisoning!

Also thanks for your support over the years and for saying I have a lot to offer the world- I definitely don't feel like it at the moment!

[BelAnna]

2 hours ago, Angst said:

H Belanna

I am following a similar journey to you. A planned move had been delayed because of the virus.
 

 I have two recent valuations of my property and I plan to have two more. No doubt your family will have received advice from the estate agents on what needs doing at minimal cost and how to stage the property. Have your family started looking for a new property? Or already placed an offer on a property? Are you likely to be involved in a chain? Are you involved in much decision making regarding the move?

If I remember correctly, you do not take any medication. Perhaps now is the time to consider taking some. It might help cushion the experience.

Some estate agents market properties by staging open days when they channel prospective buyers into one viewing day which will concentrate visits on one particular day. Your property therefore needs to be only prepped for one day. If the property is properly priced for the market this technique can work. I am considering this.

I am also considering a few months holiday rental when a paint job is done on my property and then give the keys to estate agents to show people around the place.

 

Thank you Angst! Are you feeling okay about your house move? Are you moving far from your current home? 

I am involved in some of the decision making about the house move; although it is mainly my parents' decision! We have been thinking about selling the house for quite a long time so have already painted a couple of rooms and are just going to leave it as it is now. I've spent the last year doing lots of cleaning/tidying tasks around the house (which I have hated doing!) so that it's ready to sell. I think the estate agent is trying to condense the viewings into a short time so we'll have 4-5 viewings on one day, one week and the same the next! We are going to be moving to a rental (300 miles away) initially, which adds some flexibility to when and how we move I guess! 

I think I would probably cope better staying in a holiday home when the viewings are happening but I guess in my case it would just be avoidance. 

Good luck with your move! It is a stressful thing to go through isn't it!

 

[PolarBear]

1 hour ago, OCD Hacks said:

good work dude  !

Dudette.

[PolarBear]

Belanna, you say you fear that if you stop your compulsions, your obsessions will get worse.

Oh, they will. Very likely, because your needless compulsions are so entrenched in your daily life, your mind will be screaming at you if you stop.

For a time.

And then things start to get better. The pressure eases. The thoughts let up. Your anxiety goes down. You begin to taste freedom.

[OCD Hacks]

23 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

Dudette.

ok haha !

[Caramoole]

Can you remember what kicked off the Emetophobia when you were 7?

[BelAnna]

2 hours ago, PolarBear said:

Belanna, you say you fear that if you stop your compulsions, your obsessions will get worse.

Oh, they will. Very likely, because your needless compulsions are so entrenched in your daily life, your mind will be screaming at you if you stop.

For a time.

And then things start to get better. The pressure eases. The thoughts let up. Your anxiety goes down. You begin to taste freedom.

Thank you Polarbear, that's really encouraging to hear! 

 

1 hour ago, Caramoole said:

Can you remember what kicked off the Emetophobia when you were 7?

I'm not completely sure but with therapists I've narrowed it down to:

- my youngest brother (who has a congenital condition, which affected his breathing/swallowing for the first 5/6 years of his life) almost choking to death repeatedly when he was an infant (choking resembles vomiting and is unexpected/shocking)

-witnessing a family member vomiting blood and having convulsions/seizures OR

- being separated from my Mum for prolonged periods when ill with sickness bugs (as my brother was in hospital/having surgeries etc. at times or vulnerable to infection at others)

Between the age of 5 and 7 I also lost my paternal grandma, close uncle and a pet dog so I had quite a lot of things that might have contributed to feeling anxious.

Edited July 27, 2021 by BelAnna

[Caramoole]

Those are all things that would be very frightening as a young child.  Has your therapist done any work as to how you can reframe those things as an adult?

[BelAnna]

Hi Caramoole, 

Yes they have done to some extent. My current Psychologist is going to work with me on it again in the next few sessions. My local CMHT have also just offered to refer me back to the ADRU/Bethlem again so I'm thinking about it as I had quite a difficult time there but do want to get well again! 

[Caramoole]

I remember when you went.  What was it you found most difficult?  Being away from home, too much down time, the exposures?  Maybe if you can think about the things that you found too difficult, you can better prepare or address those questions with someone

[gingerbreadgirl]

Hi Belanna

I agree these things sound very frightening as a child (or even as an adult) and it must have been incredibly difficult time which has obviously deeply affected you 

I agree that it sounds like the cognitive side is where your work needs to be the most.

You have done a lot of exposure round this over the years but still you have this destabilising fear, and I suspect (obviously I am not an expert) this may be for a few reasons - I may be wrong about any or all of these, but just some thoughts:

• you do the exposure but you grit your teeth and get through it and still fundamentally believe it is genuinely dangerous
• you do the exposure but you do some subtle compulsions on the side without necessarily realising (ruminating on the likelihood of sickness or the level of danger, self-reassuring, some subtle safety behaviours to mitigate the effects, or even just an "annoyed/resentful" inner monologue about who is to blame for the danger... all things which are easy to miss and keep the fear going)
• you haven't address the cognitive side (or not in a way which works for you)
• you do the exposure but then you later undo it through safety behaviours
• a combination of the above

You absolutely can get better from this, and you massively deserve to. As others have said you're clearly a bright, kind person with a lot to offer - ocd has taken enough from you. I truly believe that getting norovirus every day(!!) would be better than what you are currently living! if it was me I would trade that off! xx

[Angst]

Hi BelAnna

Good news that your CMHT will refer you to a specialist unit but of course if you move you will be outside their remit. Can this transfer be transferred to another CMHT? If you move to say Scotland I think different rules apply. So can the referral be made sooner rather than later? NHS systems vary in the four nations.

Traditionally CBT for OCD did not look into causes of OCD. You find this notion in Break FreeFrom OCD but CBT for OCD written by the same team with one replacement writer member does delve into the causes of OCD. Interestingly, the replacement member worked with Gilbert the originator of compassion based therapy. CBT for OCD is written for trainees in CBT. There are versions of CBT and the method evolves.  You are fortunate that your current therapist does look into the reasons for OCD and the method of cognitive reframing to use Caramoole’s term.

Given the imminence of the house move it could be that pragmatic solutions rather than ideal solutions might be more effective. And -after investigations of the implications of the move -perhaps you need to consider short term private rental to take advantage of you opportunity for referral to a specialist unit. I would discuss your options with Ashley.

These are just some thoughts on reading your recent posts.

 

Edited July 28, 2021 by Angst

[BelAnna]

On 28/07/2021 at 07:36, gingerbreadgirl said:

Hi Belanna

I agree these things sound very frightening as a child (or even as an adult) and it must have been incredibly difficult time which has obviously deeply affected you 

I agree that it sounds like the cognitive side is where your work needs to be the most.

You have done a lot of exposure round this over the years but still you have this destabilising fear, and I suspect (obviously I am not an expert) this may be for a few reasons - I may be wrong about any or all of these, but just some thoughts:

• you do the exposure but you grit your teeth and get through it and still fundamentally believe it is genuinely dangerous
• you do the exposure but you do some subtle compulsions on the side without necessarily realising (ruminating on the likelihood of sickness or the level of danger, self-reassuring, some subtle safety behaviours to mitigate the effects, or even just an "annoyed/resentful" inner monologue about who is to blame for the danger... all things which are easy to miss and keep the fear going)
• you haven't address the cognitive side (or not in a way which works for you)
• you do the exposure but then you later undo it through safety behaviours
• a combination of the above

You absolutely can get better from this, and you massively deserve to. As others have said you're clearly a bright, kind person with a lot to offer - ocd has taken enough from you. I truly believe that getting norovirus every day(!!) would be better than what you are currently living! if it was me I would trade that off! xx

Thank you Gingerbreadgirl- I found your post really helpful and thanks for the hug! 

I think I sometimes:

- do the exposure but grit my teeth and still believe there is a real risk of contracting Norovirus and vomiting, for example if I visit a busy place then I fundamentally believe I was just lucky if I don't get sick afterwards!

- I do set ERP tasks but when I'm doing normal everyday things that involve an element of exposure to contaminants I do keep going with compulsions/safety behaviours, which undermine what I have learnt from ERP tasks.

- I have tried to address the cognitive side but I'm definitely still struggling with it (as above really!) 

On 28/07/2021 at 18:59, Angst said:

Hi BelAnna

Good news that your CMHT will refer you to a specialist unit but of course if you move you will be outside their remit. Can this transfer be transferred to another CMHT? If you move to say Scotland I think different rules apply. So can the referral be made sooner rather than later? NHS systems vary in the four nations.

Traditionally CBT for OCD did not look into causes of OCD. You find this notion in Break FreeFrom OCD but CBT for OCD written by the same team with one replacement writer member does delve into the causes of OCD. Interestingly, the replacement member worked with Gilbert the originator of compassion based therapy. CBT for OCD is written for trainees in CBT. There are versions of CBT and the method evolves.  You are fortunate that your current therapist does look into the reasons for OCD and the method of cognitive reframing to use Caramoole’s term.

Given the imminence of the house move it could be that pragmatic solutions rather than ideal solutions might be more effective. And -after investigations of the implications of the move -perhaps you need to consider short term private rental to take advantage of you opportunity for referral to a specialist unit. I would discuss your options with Ashley.

These are just some thoughts on reading your recent posts.

 

Thank you Angst! I'm not sure about the referral. I've actually asked if I could be referred to the CADAT instead. I'm not sure how things will work with transferring CMHT when we move- I'll have to find out. 

Yes, I'm lucky that my Psychologist has some training in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and knowledge of compassion based techniques, which he uses alongside the other aspects of CBT (e.g. ERP) and I'm finding that helpful. I have had other Psychologists and CBT therapists in the past look into possible causes of OCD with me too. 

You're right that I'm not going to be able to instantly cope like someone without OCD in these situations and will have to compromise a bit but equally it would be good if I could walk this move with a bit less distress than I currently experience! 

I hope your move goes well once you have your house on the market! 

[gingerbreadgirl]

11 hours ago, BelAnna said:

- I do set ERP tasks but when I'm doing normal everyday things that involve an element of exposure to contaminants I do keep going with compulsions/safety behaviours

I think this is likely a massive if not the biggest factor keeping you stuck. I mean if you went for a jog to build fitness but then later stabbed yourself in the leg, it wouldn't be a mystery why your marathon times weren't improving  I'm being facetious obv but it's a similar principle. Dropping compulsions needs to be the biggest factor in overcoming OCD. I think ERP is kind of like the icing on the cake - the "anti-obsessional" path as Paul S puts it. But dropping compulsions needs to be where the bulk of the heavy lifting occurs. ERP is useless while still doing safety behaviours the rest of the time, because you're undoing the "RP" bit of "ERP".

OCD can't exist without "C". 

[BelAnna]

1 hour ago, gingerbreadgirl said:

I think this is likely a massive if not the biggest factor keeping you stuck. I mean if you went for a jog to build fitness but then later stabbed yourself in the leg, it wouldn't be a mystery why your marathon times weren't improving  I'm being facetious obv but it's a similar principle. Dropping compulsions needs to be the biggest factor in overcoming OCD. I think ERP is kind of like the icing on the cake - the "anti-obsessional" path as Paul S puts it. But dropping compulsions needs to be where the bulk of the heavy lifting occurs. ERP is useless while still doing safety behaviours the rest of the time, because you're undoing the "RP" bit of "ERP".

OCD can't exist without "C". 

Thanks Gingerbreadgirl, it's been helpful to think through this. I was thinking though- I think this is how things have been for my contamination OCD and related ERP/everyday situations but maybe not for the Emetophobia specific ERP, which I did complete without engaging in compulsions (ERP for this was things like watching clips of people vomiting; inducing nauseous feelings; looking at a 'vomit-like concoction' (basically vegetable soup) in a toilet. I managed to work through all of the ERP for Emet, without it actually making a dent in my emetophobia; and without any covert compulsions. Maybe for the Emetophobia aspect though I need to look into the cognitive side a bit more.

 

[Caramoole]

Quote

Maybe for the Emetophobia aspect though I need to look into the cognitive side a bit more.

I think you do.  It's been so entrenched in your thinking from being a small child (one too young to make a balanced judgement/appraisal) I think it does need some cognitive work.  At the moment your whole being is almost hard-wired to behave as you do.  It's also sometimes difficult to make these exposures work in therapy.  When I went to IAPT this young therapist tried to put me through imagined scenarios, she was taken aback because it raised zero anxiety response.  It didn't surprise me because I knew it wasn't real, I knew I wasn't under threat.....so it had no impact