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Perfectionism OCD.


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Hey there OCD fellow sufferers... I'm crying as I type this topic because I worked so hard on a Word document for class and I'm not sure if it's everything 100% perfect. I spent almost an hour checking if everything's alright, that there are no spelling mistakes... all normal until here... but then I saw the bleed of some pages of the document not being accurate, even though I adjusted it, I still think it's not 100% precise and I feel so anxious. If my father prints it and it turns out to be incorrect, it will be ugly and even illegible and I might have a breakdown about it. I told him to send me a picture of the first page but he can't print it just yet because he's at work. I worked so hard for this yet I think I failed. I'M SO USELESS! ?

Edited by lily17
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Just got the prints and even though I checked it again after posting, it came out asymmetric and wrong my OCD is having a feast over this I really can't I'm also too stressed I'm gonna die 

Edited by lily17
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  • 3 weeks later...
On 27/10/2021 at 04:19, Handy said:

OCPD deals with asymmetric & organizing stuff. Is this more your zone?

you actually have a point there... the other day i was just complaining because in my medical history says i was diagnosed back in 2017 with OCPD and got mad because it's different from OCD... I don't know to be honest like I /definitely/ do have OCD ...not sure if I can have both disorders at the same time ???? 

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On 26/10/2021 at 22:57, snowbear said:

Lily, it's an assignment for uni, not a manifesto for the UN. You have to try to get some perspective on this.

What do you do to relax and refocus away from your OCD?

it wasn't even an assignment, just papers for me to study.

i don't know anymore, just suffering so much at the moment. having multiple huge panic attacks lately just got a new medication for that (benzo) so let's see... it's now even just OCD anymore everything is such a mess?

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22 hours ago, lily17 said:

just suffering so much at the moment. having multiple huge panic attacks lately just got a new medication for that (benzo) so let's see... it's now even just OCD anymore everything is such a mess?

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling, Lily.

Who do you have supporting you at Uni? Have you contacted Student Health/ mental health? Did the doctor offer any other support apart from benzos? You definitely don't want to get into the habit of using benzos to cope with ongoing anxiety that could last a while. They should be for short-term incidents only and have a definite end time in sight.

Are you getting any CBT for your OCD?

Is everything a mess, or does it all just feel overwhelming because of your OCD? What other 'mess' are you dealing with and what help/ support have you enlisted for those aspects?

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