Why

[Madchoc]

Hi everyone, 

I feel really low at the moment, I just can’t seem to trust myself and my own judgment, I just want to cry all the time. We didn’t have a very good Christmas due to us getting COVID-19, it was truly horrible, thank god we had had all our jabs. Then my mums brother ended up in hospital and was diagnosed with a brain tumour, in operable given 3 months then just weeks, he only lost his wife just before Christmas last year too. He’s such a lovely man, and always so kind.My OCD has just gone huge, I don’t cope well about death, I know I may sound selfish, and I’m truly sorry for that, I still miss the fact that I can’t talk to my mum about ocd because of her Alzheimer’s, she’s doing well but can’t process it the same. I was left with a chest and water infection, that’s only just going . 
Every little thing or mark on the floor sends me into a massive panic, our kitchen bin lid won’t close properly it leaves a small gap at the side, so I don’t want to go near it. It’s a new bin too, but that wouldn’t worry anyone else, I need the bin to be like sealed. My husband is fed up with me too and I can’t blame him. I hope to hear about therapy again soon. The waiting list is huge. Sorry for the rant. 
Thank you all. Take care and stay safe xx

[PolarBear]

So what are you doing to change the way you think about the contamination thoughts and your behavior when the thoughts strike?

 

[Madchoc]

Hi Polarbear, thanks for your reply, I’m really going to try and think differently about everything. X