I’m sorry for posting this

[Ma29]

Following on from the above 

Why is everyone saying that this is pointless because moving or thrusting your hips is not wrong it’s the meaning you’re giving to it leading up to everything. I’m confused. 

[Benny]

9 minutes ago, Ma29 said:

Following on from the above 

Why is everyone saying that this is pointless because moving or thrusting your hips is not wrong it’s the meaning you’re giving to it leading up to everything. I’m confused. 

Dear Ma , 

You are not and have not been in anyway inappropriate to your baby. We know and you , deep down , know it too. 
it’s all OCD. 

[Ma29]

Ok but why does ocd make me ‘feel’ like I’m doing bad things for a bad reason like moving my hips in a thrust like action. Yep everyone will say it doesn’t matter as hip thrusts are nothing but if someone DID to something in a bad way then it would matter despite how small the action. That’s what I don’t understand. 
 

Its so scary ocd can make you feel like you’ve done something in a bad way because of your thoughts. 
 

[Ma29]

Anyone?

Can ocd make you feel like you did something in a bad way when it’s the opposite of what you want and believe and is completely  egodystonic. I feel like ocd attacked me with a vengeance and pushed me to the limits and then makes me believe i did x action for a bad reason when in reality I would have never done such a thing.  For example if a thought comes in such as ‘I’m going to do X in a bad way’ and then if you do X action you feel as though you did do this in a bad way because of your thoughts which also affect your feelings but actually the only reason you think of X as bad is due to a false belief which led to the intrusive thoughts which led to the action whilst you were doing a normal action that reminded you of the action you were fearful off. This isn’t to say ocd makes people do bad things and it’s not an excuse. I don’t know if I’m making any sense. I really need some help please. I feel like I’m being ignored. I tried my best to stay away and now I’m asking for help, I’m desperate. 
 

Rocking little one to sleep > Trigger (associations - moving hips linked to hip thrusting linked to a bad sexual action - false belief which I’m attaching meaning too) > cue a barrage of intrusive thoughts (you’re doing this in a bad way - you’re going to do this in a bad way - I’m going to do this in a bad way ( all unwanted thoughts) > panic sets in > I tell myself this is all ocd all of it > anxiety rises > I do end up thrusting my hips > anxiety goes crazy > oh no what have I done ? I feel like I did this for a bad reason, this isn’t me - no this isn’t me - how could I > extreme guilt ect. Rumination - did I actually do it in a bad way - no way I’d never but did I - no way but did I ect. Leads to me doing theory a and theory b exercise weighing up evidence for each theory and noticing it must be ocd but I can’t exactly go back and check what my exact intention was in that very moment. 
 

My therapist says to challenge the thoughts when this happens - eg, what’s the difference between me and a bad person ect?
 

I’m really struggling - can someone help me? Have I said something wrong or offensive - I feel like I’m being ignored (sorry if that comes across rude).

 

[Saffron37]

Ma, it seems like you’re asking a question that has no answer. We don’t know why OCD can make a person feel certain ways, just like we don’t exactly know why depression makes you sad or schizophrenia makes a person hallucinate. We have some clues based upon what we know of the brain and the psyche, but ultimately OCD is just the way it is. You feel like there’s some magic answer that will explain why this is happening, but there really isn’t one. It’s really tough, I know.
 

 

 

[PolarBear]

Ma29... STOP!

We aren't going to engage with your compulsions. You have asked the same questions numerous times. You have been given answers. You've been told you seeking answers is a compulsion. You took a break then came back and asked the same questions, repeatedly.

Your behavior is all compulsive and your behavior is what is keeping you stuck. You need to see this. It needs to stop.

OCD can make you think anything and feel any number of emotions. That's it. That's all you need to know. 

Any other answer you seek out will not be forthcoming. OCD wants you to ruminate and ruminate, like running on a treadmill in your head... you do a lot of work but you don't get anywhere. 

Try to leave this alone. Stop looking for answers to OCD'S questions.

[Ma29]

Thanks PB.

I just don’t get it and fail to see that I am being irrational here. I hope with time I’ll understand all of this.

I think it’s as simple as I have OCD - OCD is a liar and causes irrational fears in people. OCD tricks people by making them doubt / question everyday things. It can also make someone feel a certain way when in reality they don’t want to feel anything of the sort or do anything with bad intention. It’s scary but we have to believe that the most likely cause is OCD and let the thoughts and feelings GO.

[PolarBear]

Perfect!

[Ma29]

15 hours ago, Saffron37 said:

You feel like there’s some magic answer that will explain why this is happening, but there really isn’t one. It’s really tough, I know.

Thanks @Saffron37. It is so tough especially when obsessions revolve around such distressing topics for the individual but I guess it wouldn’t be ocd if that wasn’t the case.

[Saffron37]

20 minutes ago, Ma29 said:

Thanks @Saffron37. It is so tough especially when obsessions revolve around such distressing topics for the individual but I guess it wouldn’t be ocd if that wasn’t the case.

It's true, the topic is terribly distressing. One thing to keep in mind, however, is that every individual feels the same amount of misery and distress no matter what the focus of their obsession is; something that would seem completely meaningless to you (for example, hand washing) might produce such intense levels of anxiety in someone else that they're on the edge of a breakdown. When you read other members' threads, notice how the suffering is the same no matter how objectively "important" the obsession that is causing the pain. This is in no way meant to minimize how scary the topic you're dealing with is, just a reminder that the OCD is the true threat here!  

[Ma29]

1 hour ago, Saffron37 said:

One thing to keep in mind, however, is that every individual feels the same amount of misery and distress no matter what the focus of their obsession is; something that would seem completely meaningless to you (for example, hand washing) might produce such intense levels of anxiety in someone else that they're on the edge of a breakdown.

Yes 100% agree, that’s what I meant when I said the obsessions revolving around distressing topics for that individual. What’s distressing for me may not be for others and visa versa  . I read an article yesterday about how one man was scared of members of the public slipping on banana skins and so he’d go around looking for them to try to stop this from happening - it was the most distressing thing for him which is a great example of how obsessions can vary from person to person but the level of distress is the same. 

Edited February 18, 2022 by Ma29