I think I’m having a breakdown

[Summer9173]

Hi everybody, I’m so sorry for all the posts I’m writing but it gets things off my chest when I need to the most I’m so exhausted and I feel like everything that’s happened, with my brother with my ocd and social anxiety The stress of it all is taking it’s toll. I’m running on adrenaline during the day then when I wake up in the morning I physically can’t move from my bed, I just want to be okay again. I’ve got professionals trying to (not force But a lighter way of saying that) me onto a medication I’m extremely uncomfortable to go on, they can see I’m scared yet all I’m getting is professionals playing down my worries, I don’t mean to be scared especially to start medication but they said I need to to get better

 

One new thing that I’m noticing is that I’ll have really good moments during the day where I’m so happy and feel like me again and then it just comes crashing down where i feel completely depressed and anxious, I think that’s the hardest part. Im also certain that this medication is going to give me hallucinations and my mum said i’m being delusional. Im just so confused I think every bit of stress really has gotten to me now, I'm so sorry I just need hope, will it ever get better

[Caramoole]

I'm not the best person to advise you on medication as it's something that was never successful for me because of adverse side effects.  I also found I was very much pressured by professionals.  That said, I did try several.  It does look on the face of it that your fears are more obsessional probably because of your fears surrounding hallucinations.  The experience you described before seemed very brief and could have been a result of extreme anxiety.

As regards the medication you could give it a try.  Do it when you're in a safe place, with others around you and see what happens.  That way they are on hand to ensure your safety should anything be untoward.

If you really are unhappy about taking medication, you don't have to....but do it for the right reasons.  I have managed without medication, it can be done.....but I fear your worries are probably because of an obsession about hallucinations

[Summer9173]

4 hours ago, Caramoole said:

I'm not the best person to advise you on medication as it's something that was never successful for me because of adverse side effects.  I also found I was very much pressured by professionals.  That said, I did try several.  It does look on the face of it that your fears are more obsessional probably because of your fears surrounding hallucinations.  The experience you described before seemed very brief and could have been a result of extreme anxiety.

As regards the medication you could give it a try.  Do it when you're in a safe place, with others around you and see what happens.  That way they are on hand to ensure your safety should anything be untoward.

If you really are unhappy about taking medication, you don't have to....but do it for the right reasons.  I have managed without medication, it can be done.....but I fear your worries are probably because of an obsession about hallucinations

Thank you @Caramoole for your reply, I had somebody from the crisis team yesterday evening call me to say that If it was them they’d just take the medication and that I should be listening to the psychiatrist who’s got years of experience rather than myself. But even the psychiatrist was very pressuring  now I read that back I actually see it as quite wrong as you should never be pressured into doing anything. But I’m like you in the way side effect profiles of medications have always had an adverse effect on me - even when I didn’t care about side effects at all. It’s easy for them to say because there not taking it!!

I think I do need to start speaking up for myself now as this is my health at the end of the day. I just find it disgusting how some professionals talk to you and they don’t like it when you question it and have an opinion, Clomipramine Is a very old drug which is known for its side effects anyway so I'm going to be very cautious about it all x

 

[ecomum]

I'm in a similar situation.) I have been on meds and they have worked well for me).I am now at a bad point where I think I should maybe go back on them . It is a difficult decision . I have a drs appointment on 15th about something else, so I decided to try self help etc and give it my best shot and if I still feel I need them I will ask Dr. 

My point is, that giving myself a designated time,   of a couple of weeks,in which to decide is like a weight off my mind and I can think a bit more clearly about it ,not under pressure.

Hope this helps

[Summer9173]

4 hours ago, ecomum said:

I'm in a similar situation.) I have been on meds and they have worked well for me).I am now at a bad point where I think I should maybe go back on them . It is a difficult decision . I have a drs appointment on 15th about something else, so I decided to try self help etc and give it my best shot and if I still feel I need them I will ask Dr. 

My point is, that giving myself a designated time,   of a couple of weeks,in which to decide is like a weight off my mind and I can think a bit more clearly about it ,not under pressure.

Hope this helps

Oh I’m so sorry  relapses are scary especially when you was doing well, it’s like you have to go through it all over again. What type of medication worked for you?  I’m starting on Escitalopram so I’m quite nervous but I keep thinking even if it stops working it will be okay I’m the end. I’d love to do my driving lessons too so I’m willing to try anything that will help. But that is a good idea, I’ve always felt under pressure by psychiatrist’s anyway x

[thistooshallpass1996]

I’m sorry to read that you’re going through this at the moment.
 

Everything gets better in time  

you know where I am if you need me x