Summer9173 Posted August 15, 2022 Share Posted August 15, 2022 Hello everybody, So my birthday was yesterday and despite everything I still got through the day  however this evening I am going to the Slug and Lettuce bar, around 15 minutes to where I live and safe to say….. I’m terrified xx As some of you know, I have harm OCD. I have a fear I’ll randomly or impulsively strangle or attack a stranger or somebody I care about, or even open move the steering wheel when somebody is driving/push somebody in the road etc. However the more I’ve learnt about OCD, the more I don’t want to let it stop me from living my life. I haven’t been to a bar in years (My 18th when my OCD wasn’t prominent in my life.) This post is a sort of document to myself to look back on, as this is at the top of my own hierarchy chart  so, let’s see how the evening goes….. Link to comment
snowbear Posted August 15, 2022 Share Posted August 15, 2022 9 minutes ago, Summer9173 said: this evening I am going to the Slug and Lettuce bar I simply have to ask... is that the real name of the bar? Or is it a euphemism for something? I can't imagine anyone wanting to eat salad at a place that suggests slugs have got to the lettuce it serves. Anyway, have fun and don't let OCD spoil your evening. Remember they are just silly thoughts with no power. Link to comment
Lynz Posted August 15, 2022 Share Posted August 15, 2022 Slug and Lettuce are a massive chain of bars/restaurants. They have them all over the place and are quite nice. Have a lovely evening tonight Summer and well done for pushing yourself to go out Link to comment
foreverobsessing Posted August 15, 2022 Share Posted August 15, 2022 Have a lovely evening! Let us know how you get on you’ve got this. Link to comment
Caramoole Posted August 16, 2022 Share Posted August 16, 2022 Summer......I haven't the time to list the "harm" fears I've had over the decades. Started with fear of stabbing my Husband.....then harming any vulnerable person (or animall,myself) Children, the elderly, disabled, animals.....knives, driving into people or oncoming cars etc etc etc. Four decades on nothing, zilch, Nada, zero! It just ain't going to happen. The only thing at risk is your sanity from obeying the fear. You have an advantage on the 20 year old me in that you have the information. Please try and trust it. Do these things you fear.....again, again and then some. OCD is horribly uncomfortable.......it's not dangerous other than to your own well-being. Trust me Link to comment
NoOrdinaryGirl Posted August 16, 2022 Share Posted August 16, 2022 I hope it went well - you are not your fears !!! and harm ocd is a horrible horrible thing to deal with and you're so strong xx    Link to comment
Summer9173 Posted August 16, 2022 Author Share Posted August 16, 2022 15 hours ago, snowbear said: I simply have to ask... is that the real name of the bar? Or is it a euphemism for something? I can't imagine anyone wanting to eat salad at a place that suggests slugs have got to the lettuce it serves. Anyway, have fun and don't let OCD spoil your evening. Remember they are just silly thoughts with no power. Hahahaha thank you @snowbear   Yes that’s the name of the restaurant!! It’s a weird one I’ll agree but it’s actually very lovely inside  I didn’t manage to make it there however I went to another bar just that little less further and I’m still very proud of myself!! I also managed to have 2 cocktails, although I’ve woken up with awful anxiety today Link to comment
Summer9173 Posted August 16, 2022 Author Share Posted August 16, 2022 15 hours ago, Lynz said: Slug and Lettuce are a massive chain of bars/restaurants. They have them all over the place and are quite nice. Have a lovely evening tonight Summer and well done for pushing yourself to go out Thank you @Lynz  I did actually have a really wonderful night. I left at 10:30 because the place shut, however I went home feeling incredibly proud of myself  I have woken up with horrendous anxiety however, I’m set to be going back to work on Thursday because I’m on annual leave, but my anxiety is absolutely awful  I’m having relationship issues too where he’s being extremely disrespectful, yet I just don’t have the power to walk away because deep down, I hope he’ll go back to how he used to be - I know it’s stupid  it’s like mental torture xx Link to comment
Summer9173 Posted August 16, 2022 Author Share Posted August 16, 2022 15 hours ago, foreverobsessing said: Have a lovely evening! Let us know how you get on you’ve got this. Thank you so much!! I did have a really wonderful evening  they had Mexican music on which was pretty cool!!  I do feel incredibly anxious today, but I know it’ll go down by the evening Link to comment
Summer9173 Posted August 16, 2022 Author Share Posted August 16, 2022 8 hours ago, Caramoole said: Summer......I haven't the time to list the "harm" fears I've had over the decades. Started with fear of stabbing my Husband.....then harming any vulnerable person (or animall,myself) Children, the elderly, disabled, animals.....knives, driving into people or oncoming cars etc etc etc. Four decades on nothing, zilch, Nada, zero! It just ain't going to happen. The only thing at risk is your sanity from obeying the fear. You have an advantage on the 20 year old me in that you have the information. Please try and trust it. Do these things you fear.....again, again and then some. OCD is horribly uncomfortable.......it's not dangerous other than to your own well-being. Trust me Thank you @Caramooleyour advice always helps me so much  I did manage to go out in the end and I am very proud of myself that I did, I do have a lot of anxiety today but I know that’s also normal  I find the harm thoughts get worse the next day after doing an exposure, it’s like the OCD gremlins way of saying ‘well yeah nothing happened here, but it will next time.’  I know I have a long way to go but I agree with everything you said, I have a lot of information about it now Link to comment
Summer9173 Posted August 16, 2022 Author Share Posted August 16, 2022 3 hours ago, NoOrdinaryGirl said: I hope it went well - you are not your fears !!! and harm ocd is a horrible horrible thing to deal with and you're so strong xx    Thank you so much for your kind words @NoOrdinaryGirl  currently lying in bed recovering from yesterday lol!! xx Link to comment
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