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Ocd and relationships


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Seeking a bit of assistance as my ocd is starting to interfere with my relationship and just wondering what other people have done to fix it/make it better. My obsessions for the most part are now all fixated on her and I find myself constantly battling with thoughts that something could go wrong even though it couldn't be going any better.

I find myself fixated on different ideas of how she's could break my trust or hurt me in some way and at times I feel like I'm unsure what is real and what is irrational and end up having a go at her for it. She does understand what I'm going through and it doesn't even seem to phase her but worry that as time goes on I'll end up just pushing her away. It just seems like the happier I become the more I worry how much it'll hurt and the more intense the thoughts get.

 For context I should mention that I suffered a lot of psychological and sometimes physical abuse in my previous relationship, and they were not understanding of my ocd at all, and I'm not sure if I've just carried some trauma over from that, but I remember that my ocd was definitely somewhat of an issue then too.

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Relationships are stressful so raise our compulsions.  

I pick people who have OCD too. So we talk about it & get mutual respect.  I find it easier than trying to explain it to someone who doesn't have it. 

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Hi Dantheflan,

It's hard to say whether or not these worries are because of OCD or not, however there are some things that these worries will have in common with OCD. Caring for someone means that you risk getting hurt, OCD hates risk, you can't know for 100% sure that everything will be fine in the future, OCD hates uncertainty. Whether or not it's OCD doesn't matter too much as long as you approach the worry over risk and uncertainty the same. 

Look out for what behaviours you do that say you need to constantly keep a look out for things going wrong, try your best to reduce them, and your feelings and concentration on them will reduce over time.

Gemma :)

 

 

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