I want be an Ex- Sufferer

[Nikki79]

There’s been a lot of conversation here about becoming an Ex- Sufferer and I really have to say I want to be one. I must be failing all round tho cos I just had a hard week with OCD thoughts and horrible fears but I so desperately want to be free from all of it. What’s the best advice anyone can give to overcome this disorder?

[DRS1]

9 minutes ago, Nikki79 said:

There’s been a lot of conversation here about becoming an Ex- Sufferer and I really have to say I want to be one. I must be failing all round tho cos I just had a hard week with OCD thoughts and horrible fears but I so desperately want to be free from all of it. What’s the best advice anyone can give to overcome this disorder?

It depends on how you want to view that (what you yourself define as not suffering) and what your goals are. If your idea of ex-sufferer is to not have an intrusive thought for example then you are very unlikely to get there (can't say it can't happen because no 100% certainty and all) but if your goal is to be able to respond to intrusive thoughts with no (or at least fewer compulsions), then that's a goal you can definitely achieve.

 

I can't really speak as much on it at the moment as OCD definitely spiked for me in the last few months but here's a good example: OCD has spiked and now I need to figure out what ERP and CBT needs to be for this. That doesn't mean I'm "suffering", it just means things got a bit harder. I'm not suffering at the hand of OCD, I'm dealing with OCD. It might just be semantics is a much more positive way of looking at it.

 

Just because I have ups and downs doesn't mean that everything has went backwards. It also doesn't mean I'll ever be free of thoughts or images I don't like, but accepting these things has been really helpful for me.

[malina]

15 minutes ago, Nikki79 said:

I must be failing all round tho cos I just had a hard week with OCD thoughts and horrible fears but I so desperately want to be free from all of it.

I think this is why labelling isn't a great thing to do. You shouldn't feel like a failure because you're struggling with a mental illness! This is what society should be moving away from, not encouraging. Just take it easy, it's a process that has many ups and downs, just like everything else in life. Keep working towards your goals but please don't feel like you have failed because it has been hard and you're going through a tough time.

[snowbear]

4 minutes ago, DRS1 said:

OCD has spiked and now I need to figure out what ERP and CBT needs to be for this. That doesn't mean I'm "suffering", it just means things got a bit harder. I'm not suffering at the hand of OCD, I'm dealing with OCD. It might just be semantics is a much more positive way of looking at it.

       

[Nikki79]

I just want to be winning at this. Like us all I guess xx

[JackieAM]

2 hours ago, Nikki79 said:

There’s been a lot of conversation here about becoming an Ex- Sufferer and I really have to say I want to be one. I must be failing all round tho cos I just had a hard week with OCD thoughts and horrible fears but I so desperately want to be free from all of it. What’s the best advice anyone can give to overcome this disorder?

Me too

[Nikki79]

24 minutes ago, JackieAM said:

Me too

Sorry to hear that Jackie. I guess if we implement the right techniques like not engaging with the ocd we can do better x

[Angst]

4 hours ago, Nikki79 said:

There’s been a lot of conversation here about becoming an Ex- Sufferer and I really have to say I want to be one. I must be failing all round tho cos I just had a hard week with OCD thoughts and horrible fears but I so desperately want to be free from all of it. What’s the best advice anyone can give to overcome this disorder?

My advice from my experience. But I wonder if we can generalise,is to reduce environmental stressors. I have moved property and my checking behaviours have reduced almost to zero. My checking behaviours were physical checking caused by the environment I was in. Another reduction in OCD was when I ceased being a carer. I suffered terribly.Suicidal thoughts with plans to end it all. I came very close. Constant ringing of the Samaritans. Therapy helped I had 38 weeks at Cadat for OCD, depression and hoarding. But some of the major stressors had reduced by then. The things I learnt from therapy was most importantly plan to do enjoyable things, create good memories and put things into proportion. The formulations were good.  Building up a cognitive model of OCD. And the support of the therapist to take risks. The ERP part. This was crucial.Visits to my home were crucial. Plan and do things. Switch attention to enjoyable things. I do still suffer from some things but I put this down to depression as did the therapist. Hence we worked on the findings of Paul Gilbert and memory therapy. This area of therapy has expanded recently. I wonder if my memory problems would be defined as depression given the recent stuff on memory and OCD.

My OCD is about checking the physical environment - doors, leaks, fears of break ins, checking plumbing, checking bins, checking medicationfor others.It might be that OCD with other themes have other stories.

[northpaul]

11 minutes ago, Angst said:

Plan and do things. Switch attention to enjoyable things.

Yes and yes.  One notable example of this was between 2003-2005 after a long and deep depressive episode.  After discussion with a mental health nurse I decided to go along to the local college as an adult learner. I immersed myself in the learning and the friendship of others on the course.  I was enjoying myself.  I ended up with an award for the adult learner of the year.

My mood was lifted, and OCD was put in the back seat and I was in the driving seat.  This led to full time employment in the NHS from 2006 (now retired).

So yes, change of environment, following a plan and enjoying it really does help to put OCD in the back seat!

[JackieAM]

4 hours ago, Nikki79 said:

Sorry to hear that Jackie. I guess if we implement the right techniques like not engaging with the ocd we can do better x

Yes indeed.

Thing is, just when I start to feel bit better, the dread returns and I feel so sad and desperate.  Then really disappointed as scared I’ll never improve fully.

[Nikki79]

5 minutes ago, JackieAM said:

Yes indeed.

Thing is, just when I start to feel bit better, the dread returns and I feel so sad and desperate.  Then really disappointed as scared I’ll never improve fully.

I know where you are coming from. The thing is tho this is all in our heads and as my friend said tonight it’s like an invisible illness. We must never lose hope tho that we can beat it, it’s within us I’m sure of it x

[JackieAM]

53 minutes ago, Nikki79 said:

I know where you are coming from. The thing is tho this is all in our heads and as my friend said tonight it’s like an invisible illness. We must never lose hope tho that we can beat it, it’s within us I’m sure of it x

Thank you

[Cam81]

I will always have hope, however some mornings are harder than others for me to see it.

I would like to say the support from my wife as well as you all on here has meant alot.

[Seb]

Can’t see me ever being a ex sufferer. I deal with one aspect of ocd then another comes up and so on. I’m getting good at being aware of ocd looming but still days like today when I get totally sucked in  and lose hours before the light bulb comes on.

wish you all the best..

[Nikki79]

15 hours ago, Cam81 said:

I will always have hope, however some mornings are harder than others for me to see it.

I would like to say the support from my wife as well as you all on here has meant alot.

I’m so glad you have good support and this forum has been a life saver to me as to many. 

[Nikki79]

2 hours ago, Seb said:

Can’t see me ever being a ex sufferer. I deal with one aspect of ocd then another comes up and so on. I’m getting good at being aware of ocd looming but still days like today when I get totally sucked in  and lose hours before the light bulb comes on.

wish you all the best..

I know my friend, I know what it’s like all to well. I wish you all the best also, you can beat this  

[howard]

It is in many ways, as has been stated elsewhere, good to not obsess about OCD.

It is easy to focus in on it, but also to not forget all the other positive aspects of our lives, all the other positive things we can do.

[Caramoole]

11 hours ago, Seb said:

I deal with one aspect of ocd then another comes up and so on.

I think this is one of the most common problems and probably the greatest.......treating each separate variation as a new thing to be dealt with, rather than it "all" being the same problem......OCD.  If we treat each of these different aspects as a "new thing" to be dealt with each time, it will continue to plague us each and every day.  It is rather like the same bogie man who turns up one day in a red sweater, the next in a green one, the next in yellow wellies, then in a purple duffle coat.  The intruder is the same but wearing different outfits.  Forget the nature of the intrusion, the fear thought and how it manifests.  Work at recognising OCD.  The familiar sense of fear, of terror, of dread that accompanies it.....there will be a pattern to the awful sense of fear and anxiety it brings.  Try to get good at recognising that....ignore the content and instead try to recognise "This is an OCD fear" and then resist the habitual, knee-jerk response and reaction we tend to take to handle it.

Don't try to deal with OCD as one aspect after another......try and recognise it's one thing, different disguise.  I know it's not easy but if you can really work at mastering that skill........truly getting good at recognising OCD when it strikes and yet carrying on whilst refusing to get pulled in to any of the reactions we use to try and beat the fear......you will make good progress.  

[Seb]

Good advice there, thank you

yeap here’s my ocd.. time to read a book,watch football,make a brew etc..ect