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Mangos&lime

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  • OCD Status
    Sufferer

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  1. I've had the exact same. 3years ago j had a breakdown after having my daughter. And suffered with horrendous OCD thoughts I kept thinking why am I having these looking back at the past and my head went **lightbulb** I then looked up and said to my mum I once baby sat my friends daughter and she wanted to get off my lap and I didn't let her cause she was being a pain... then I went did I keep her there cause I was aroused? Then I started to think did I rub her on me? I then start thinking to myself have I just forgotten the memory and it's came back like 3/4 years later. But surely you wouldn't forget if you committed such a horrible thing that goes against all my morals? So hard
  2. Hi everyone. I've got an assessment this afternoon and I'm so nervous. I've hadassessments before but I'm just so scared as this one is because I'm struggling with False memory's has any one else been to an assessment for this?
  3. Thank you for your support. I just find it so strange that these things can appear out of know where. I never felt nervous when I had my breakdown back in 2013 when I had PND. But I'm super nervous this time ?
  4. Thank you for your reply. Yes I have been diagnosed with OCD. It changes all the time. When I was pregnant it was about germs.. I was constantly going to the hospital to check everything was OK with my baby. I havean appointment with the mental health team Thursday... I'm so nervous. I work for a mental health service already so I have an understanding of OCD but I constantly keep thinking no that's just you, your a bad person... it's litreally heart breaking. I just want to be happy.. But whenever I am it creeps up saying your a bad person your not aloud to be happy. Does that make sense?
  5. Hi, i was first diagnosed with OCD when i had a break down with Post natal Depression, i had very intrusive thoughts about my daughter which disgusted me so much i felt i had lost my mind. One day 3 years ago i was crying to my mum, and was trying to think of why was i having these thoughts? I then looked up and said well once i was looking after my friends little girl and she was being a pain so i put her on my lap and sang row row the boat she wanted to get down but i was trying to keep her entertained.. i then said to my mum OMG what if i had feelings? and kept her there and wouldnt let her go? me and mum both then said thats not a thing i would do... I then spiralled out of controll and said what if i rubbed her on me . After a day or two Perinatal contacted me and i was with them for a year the false memorys disapaeared. 3 years on they have come back... what if i did? i then think to myself i look after my friends children 100000% and never had this thought untill i became poorly. I just need support its so hard on my family they are constatntly hearing me go over the situation 100 times a day with the story allways changing. Is this OCD or could i have done this horrible thing and repressed the memory. I feel so awful i wouldnt be able to live with myself if it was true.
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