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I agree people wouldn't clean unless there was visible dirt - it wouldn't cross most people's minds

Hi belanna, after a viewing you would only clean say for example the viewer didn’t take off their shoes and brought mud into the house.

It's because you hae a mental illness. It's like saying why doesn't someone with a broken leg just start walking....they can't do it immediately, they have to let their leg heal, practice, take small steps etc...You can't just let it go, but you can work on it, take steps and practice until you are able to.

I am working on my obsessions and compulsions with ERP. I've gotten to the point where I am pretty disciplined about ignoring my thoughts whenever a trigger occurs. But I spend much of my time anticipating triggers. An example would be that if I had germaphobia, I would spend much of my time worrying about being in contact with germs, but once I am triggered, (say, by touching a doorknob or stepping in dirt), I ignore the thoughts and feelings and go about my business. How do I stop anticipating/worrying about being in a triggering situation? Will this worry go away on its own as I continue labeling and ignoring my obsessive thoughts?

You don't have to get it. Just accept it. Don't spend any more time trying to get it, either. Accept it and leave it alone.

It is very hard, @malina. It feels like I'm going insane because I just don't get it why I won't let it go. It's so bad...

@snowbear, this is such amazing advice! I've been reading and re-reading it and it makes perfect sense. But I still find it very hard to accept that there is no link between all those urges and the actions that happen after the urges. I don't know why I don't get it and why my brain won't let me move on.

It's just a mental or emotional link. There's no contamination- it just feels like there is because of the emotions attached to the car. Even if you got the car back tomorrow and rolled around in it and then sat and touched things all over your house, there would be absolutely no risk of anything, there'd be no contamination, everything would be fine. It's just that OCD is awful and makes everyone scared when they don't need to be!

Hi Ryork1 & welcome! There have been a number of sufferers on here over the years with the same problem. I think one in particular was @bruces, but I have not heard from him in while. Take a look at this, & perhaps use the search facility if you don't get many replies. https://www.ocdforums.org/index.php?/topic/80289-ocd-in-my-job-as-a-mechanic/&tab=comments#comment-686166 All the best.

We do, I have yet to find an experience that has changed me as much as this forum. It’s been fundamental in my understanding and treatment of OCD. I have loads of books on OCD. I’m sure I have Brain Lock somewhere.

Yes Nikki we will! We have the best support here! I am currently reading the Brain Lock, great book 💪🏽

I work in the motor trade and have checking OCD. I manage to get through the day without checking I've tightened/torqued bolts up multiple times. But minutes after doing certain bolts I'm already worrying I've not done it right which causes terrible worry/ruminating for days after. Has anybody else had a similar experience which could give me any tips to cope or overcome this.

No they wouldn't. They might run a vac over the hall carpet if they'd trailed bits in (gravel/dirt/grass) but only because what was pristine-looking earlier now had bits on it.

Ok mate I’m rooting for you 💪. We can overcome this, we know what it is and how it works so therefore we can do the right thing as hard as it is.

OCD wants to keep the upper hand always, the method is not easy, we must just commit and stick to it... I am practicing the same actually... we can overcome this together, as many did before us...

Hi bahiano, I am doing it I really am but it’s not without feeling guilty for doing it and my brain screaming ‘ you can’t just do that!!’

Yes I think it was exactly the same for me for most of these situations. For example for spinning around making myself nauseous (an ERP task set by one CBT therapist)- I could reason with myself that this was self-induced, time-limited and manageable nausea (!). The vomit-like-soup-concoction- well I'm not an idiot and it was clearly vegetable soup, mixed with something. The video clips on the other hand did make me somewhat anxious and actually seemed to sensitize (rather than desensitize/habituate) me to some of the situations that people in the clips were vomiting in, so for example one of the clips was of someone vomiting suddenly after stopping their car; now every time I see a car stopped, I imagine someone is about to vomit and have a full-on phobic panic (i.e. telling everyone in our car to close their car windows and to turn the air conditioning off!). We have several house viewings tomorrow and like usual I'm panicking that someone will bring Norovirus into our house. I want my life back so know I need to behave like a normal person but I'm not sure how well I will manage to. I think I might have to clean a bit afterwards, because having any visitors to our house is overwhelming enough in itself; let alone strangers whose hygiene could be poor. So a normal person would not even give this any thought would they- they'd just think 'I hope the house sells quickly' and get on with it- would they clean at all afterwards do you think?

Good job! That´s the way to go.... practice makes perfect, just try the best to your abilities, it does get better...

I think you do. It's been so entrenched in your thinking from being a small child (one too young to make a balanced judgement/appraisal) I think it does need some cognitive work. At the moment your whole being is almost hard-wired to behave as you do. It's also sometimes difficult to make these exposures work in therapy. When I went to IAPT this young therapist tried to put me through imagined scenarios, she was taken aback because it raised zero anxiety response. It didn't surprise me because I knew it wasn't real, I knew I wasn't under threat.....so it had no impact

Thanks Gingerbreadgirl, it's been helpful to think through this. I was thinking though- I think this is how things have been for my contamination OCD and related ERP/everyday situations but maybe not for the Emetophobia specific ERP, which I did complete without engaging in compulsions (ERP for this was things like watching clips of people vomiting; inducing nauseous feelings; looking at a 'vomit-like concoction' (basically vegetable soup) in a toilet. I managed to work through all of the ERP for Emet, without it actually making a dent in my emetophobia; and without any covert compulsions. Maybe for the Emetophobia aspect though I need to look into the cognitive side a bit more.

So after reading that post from reddit it is the closest description to my present problem. I’m not sure I need to go back and change the meaning of the bad experience with the car, but I do need to deal with objects in the present. so I have projected contamination onto objects that have: 1. A definite link to the car eg were inside it at some point and became infected. These are the worst ones as I KNOW there is a link 2. Items that are unknown and may have been in a car of the same manufacturer , this includes physical money so I can almost just about deal with these items. I’m aware my cleaning after contact and avoidance is to isolate me from the past. Same reason I discarded many items years ago as “ I did not want anything in common with my past”. I am aware the link between past and present is irrational but despite this I am still avoiding/ cleaning as the urge /anxiety is strong. I think I may be seeing some objects as having a physical instead of mental link to the past. If I know an object was inside the car , is that a physical contact or a mental one? If it’s an object which may have been inside but I don’t know then it’s just mental right? so anyway I am aware a third party would not see the same as me and not see any contamination. Same as I would not see contamination in someone else’s contaminated items. so this problem needs to be dealt with inside/internally. washing, cleaning and avoidance is futile. the final part of the reddit post I’d love some opinions on: ” objects have meaning only in the context of a subjects mind/experiences, not the other way round” “Therefore a persons internal world cannot be violated/threatened in any way by the outside environment /objects” ”mind is superior to the physical world, invincible.” So I’d love to hear any views on this and my conclusion is I need to get my head around the last bit, how can I get it to sink in , how can I believe I can’t be violated by the objects? Is it just a mental link I am making or because I’m seeing it as a physical link ( objects that were known to be inside the car ) that’s making it harder? Or is this whole link destroyed by the third party argument? Does the fact someone else sees the objects as neutral win over ?

I think this is likely a massive if not the biggest factor keeping you stuck. I mean if you went for a jog to build fitness but then later stabbed yourself in the leg, it wouldn't be a mystery why your marathon times weren't improving I'm being facetious obv but it's a similar principle. Dropping compulsions needs to be the biggest factor in overcoming OCD. I think ERP is kind of like the icing on the cake - the "anti-obsessional" path as Paul S puts it. But dropping compulsions needs to be where the bulk of the heavy lifting occurs. ERP is useless while still doing safety behaviours the rest of the time, because you're undoing the "RP" bit of "ERP". OCD can't exist without "C".

Hi guys I had some relief last night and today is a new day. I don’t feel as anxious as I did yesterday morning but I still have the worries from my latest bout of worries tumbling around my brain like a washing machine. I can see the clothes through the little window but I’m trying not to focus on what’s what. I think I’m just looking for strength and a green light to say I don’t need to go there. I wish I could do that for myself, hopefully eventually I can. I’m trying not to give the thoughts attention and all the questions etc that they pose.

Anyone with Real Event OCD? How do I find a reason to live when I'm almost convinced that I'm horrible and deserve the worst in the world?

Thank you Gingerbreadgirl- I found your post really helpful and thanks for the hug! I think I sometimes: - do the exposure but grit my teeth and still believe there is a real risk of contracting Norovirus and vomiting, for example if I visit a busy place then I fundamentally believe I was just lucky if I don't get sick afterwards! - I do set ERP tasks but when I'm doing normal everyday things that involve an element of exposure to contaminants I do keep going with compulsions/safety behaviours, which undermine what I have learnt from ERP tasks. - I have tried to address the cognitive side but I'm definitely still struggling with it (as above really!) Thank you Angst! I'm not sure about the referral. I've actually asked if I could be referred to the CADAT instead. I'm not sure how things will work with transferring CMHT when we move- I'll have to find out. Yes, I'm lucky that my Psychologist has some training in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and knowledge of compassion based techniques, which he uses alongside the other aspects of CBT (e.g. ERP) and I'm finding that helpful. I have had other Psychologists and CBT therapists in the past look into possible causes of OCD with me too. You're right that I'm not going to be able to instantly cope like someone without OCD in these situations and will have to compromise a bit but equally it would be good if I could walk this move with a bit less distress than I currently experience! I hope your move goes well once you have your house on the market!