snowbear

The objective view would be that not washing hands after going to the loo is unhygenic (and for many people that's a bit yucky.) But it doesn't make surfaces the person touches 'contaminated' in the OCD sense. So any mantal tracking of where might have been touched and any worries over 'needing' to clean everything that might have been touched by the unwaashed hands is OCD. Normal thinking would simply carry on without thinking about it and wash their own hands after touching the toilet flush themselves.

Totally misses the point!

Definitely another compulsion. Not a recommended way of treating OCD.

Totally unnecessary and not a good way to treat the problem. ERP doesn't have to be so literal Handy. @Roami gave good advice ERP can be about learning not to react to the thoughts.

I'm not surprised you're exhausted. You're sending yourself round in circles like a hamster on a wheel. Stop trying to work it out or fix it! Total lie. Trying to solve it is the problem, and has been from the start. You seem to gain temporary insight that this is an OCD problem, but then you return to the question 'Did I agree with the OCD?' and off you go round the circle again. The picture is what it has always been. NONE OF THIS MATTERS. Doesn't matter if you agreed with a thought or disagreed. Doesn't matter if you acted in frustration or deliberately out of anger. Doesn't matter if you yet understand OCD fully or not. You just have to resolve to stop trying to work it out. Don't let the guilty feelings guilt-trip you into going back round the OCD cycle yet again. They too can be ignored. The guilt will pass as your understanding of what's really going on here improves. But you'll never gain insight by going round in circles asking yourself the same questions over and over. STOP TRYING TO SOLVE IT.

That's right. Your therapist seems confused. Everybody gets intrusive thoughts, not just people with OCD. OCD doesn't create bad thoughts or send them to you. OCD starts with you giving meaning to a thought. (Whether it's an intrusive or normal thought) Even labelling a thought as 'bad' is giving meaning to it. Typical of OCD to try to 'solve the problem' You were right, your therapist either explained it badly (it happens) or she doesn't understand OCD very well. Either way, there is no problem. Put this aside and go back to what you know - if you get an intrusive thought just ignore it and let it pass the same way as someone without OCD. Don't latch onto it, give it meaning, or obsess over it.

You freak out every time you get caught up in the OCD thinking. So next time you're 'freaking out' just say to yourself 'I'm feeling like this because I'm buying into the OCD thinking' Remember, you're not feeling like this because of the content of the thoughts. Only because of the process. You're on the OCD merry-go-round. At some point you have to stop complaining of feeling dizzy and put your foot down to stop the spin.

1. Recognise this as just another round of the OCD thinking cycle. OCD begins with giving something a meaning it doesn't actually mean at all. 2. Recognise the compulsion - telling yourself you're a paedophile. 3. Recognise that your feelings (guilt or lack of guilt) is created entirely by what you choose to tell yourself. You can win. You can break the OCD cycle at any point by challenging your thinking, stop giving in to the compulsions, or change what you say to yourself (which changes how you feel.) You're not a helpless victim of OCD, but a willing hostage. You go along with whatever OCD demands because you're not certain what will happen if you stand up to it. You hate uncertainty so much that you prefer the 'certainty' of calling yourself a paedophile rather than accept the 'uncertainty' that you might not be a paedophile. You win by becoming willing to accept 'uncertainty'.

What kind of sick brain would make a person call themselves a 'sick freak'? What kind of sick brain would attach such meaning to a thought? Just what kind of a sick brain have you got???? Ah yes, a brain with OCD. A very unwell brain indeed. You are indeed holding yourself hostage. You're buying into the OCD. But you don't have to. You're free to let it go whenever you want. You just have to accept that these 'promises' are compulsions and part of your OCD thinking disorder. They aren't in any way like real promises where you uphold them because it is morally right to do so. Indeed, the right thing to do here is to resist the compulsion, deliberately go against the OCD and stop holding yourself hostage over some words you thought in your unwell brain.

mops > spam

@Handy

Hi CarysR and to the forums. What you describe is all very typical of OCD. Have you read up on OCD at all? Understanding how it works is an excellent place to begin. In short: 1. Becoming obsessed by thoughts we've had, or obsessed with preventing something (such as making sure no harm comes to your cat) happens because of the meaning we attach to these things. 2. The obsessive thoughts result in unwanted feelings 3. This leads to compulsions - acts performed to get rid of the unwanted feelings The feeling can be anything - fear, anger, disgust, jealousy... anything that makes you uncomfortable. Compulsions can be mental as well as physical. The biggest of these is called ruminating (going over and over the thoughts you've had and thinking them (or about them) again and again. The problem with compulsions is they don't relieve the unwanted feelings for long, and every time we give in to them it feeds the obsession and guarantees further obsessive concerns. Once you can recognise the OCD cycle: thoughts > feelings > compulsions > thoughts > feelings > compulsions... you can decide at which point of the cycle you want to intervene. You can resist the compulsions, learn that feelings aren't permanent and unwanted feelings aren't to be feared, or you can challenge the thinking and beliefs that create the obsessions in the first place. Have you sought any help for OCD at Uni? These days most universities are well geared up to offer therapy and support. Maybe a first step would be to chat to someone in Student Health. See what they offer for mental health problems.

Hi Scott, Can you describe what you think a 'magic boost' would look like? Putting it into words may help you to clarify what you need to do next to make progress. Do you mean your therapist says this to you? If that's all she's offering then maybe she's right that therapy should end. I don't believe people with OCD are lacking in courage. When we hit a plateau or impassable obstacle there's usually a good reason why, typically something we're telling ourselves in our internal self-talk, or a hidden belief that we're unaware of that 'doing xyz means...' Changing what you say to yourself and challenging any beliefs that stand in your way can help. Typically the self-talk and hidden beliefs aren't true and don't stand up to scrutiny, but we simply never challenge them because they're 'just there' and how things have always been. A decent therapist should be looking at why you're finding it difficult 'to dare more' rather than just suggesting you need to push yourself harder. sometimes it is just a matter of being willing to move out of our comfort zone, but even then there'll be a reason why you're not doing so of your own accord. You could list the perceived gains of overcoming your OCD versus the perceived gains of continuing in your comfort zone. Notice I said perceived gains - so it's not always as obvious as 'Of course I want to be rid of my OCD!' What do you think is holding you back? You say no 'significant' improvements. The key to taking the next step may lie in that phrase. What would significant progress look like to you? Again, putting it into words may help you clarify what it is you value more- the 'security' of OCD or whatever the freedom of significant progress might be. Hope that gives you some things to think about. And don't hesitate to raise these ideas with your therapist too. Hopefully she'll be excited to work through it with you and help you make a step-by-step plan to overcome the obstacles currently in your way to 'daring more'.

#tag Just saying ... anything can be a trigger, even words that 'most people' consider safe or positive. Also, the meaning of a word can vary depending on how it is interpreted by the individual, within cultures, and depending on context. Case in point... an affectionate name would call somebody I love in a fun and happy way... Rest > pest (Good idea for a topic Raomi. Just pulling your leg a wee bit by pointing out the flaw in the thinking that it's even possible to avoid trigger words or 'negative' words. )

Ah, I get you. I'm not aware of any such official list, but people might post replies with some good tips. My top tip is to mentally ringfence your work. OCD thinking doesn't apply during working hours and compulsive urges can be ignored completely. I used that technique very successfuly for decades. Not only was it essential (because I had to work) but it also gave me a break from the OCD from the moment I went into work to the moment I left. That made going to work pleasurable and something to look forward too, as well as making it easier (possible) to do my job without OCD causing problems.