ocdsufferer85

Thank you very much for your kind responses, I am having a bad day as it is with other medical stuff so this helped me. Thank you, and I hope you are getting better too x

I get what you mean yes, I know I should accept it's how to treat it, it just feels so bad, as anyone else's exposure would though, so it's one big nightmare for us all!

What I'm wanting to ask now to anyone who knows, does ocd still work the same way no matter the theme? It's still as @taurean said going against what you want, so it has to be ocd. Someone with harm doesn't want to stab someone and isn't a killer... Just as someone who doesn't want to upset God isn't a blasphemer just because ocd puts the horrible thoughts there? My problem is feeling like I let the ocd draw me in, that I could have done different, I could have avoided it...the same as someone staying around the sharp objects and thinking "what if I actually did just stab someone now" Do people with harm ocd feel like the urge is real? I'm not sure if kine was an urge it happened so quickly. I feel mine was a moment of self confidence soon to be shattered by ocd.

But the exposure for me is thinking bad thoughts against God I don't get the proof it's harmless

Its not lost its sting and I've had a dip today, other stuff is going on so it doesn't help but I had to write it down again the logical slips away too often I am worried that i am worse thinking it so I am too scared

Horrible being made to think things I really don't want to, and the fear that if I do God is mad. But I really don't want the thoughts and dont mean them which is why I'm afraid I feel horrible and I have to replay it over and over and over

Thank you for the nice replies, I am struggling with guilt over being made to think it on purpose though

I know it's meant to help and it's gonna be hard but does it make sense for me at the moment to feel worse? Like I am disgusted by certain thoughts and wish I never got them...so to be made to create them on loop in your head makes me feel worse of a person?

Thanks everyone x

Just had my first session of cbt this year Exposure is happening It's hard My first task is to think the thought I fear over and over for certain amounts of time...increasing the times and leaving my mouth open. I did it once in session and now my homework is to do this. Then it's writing the thought and finally speaking it. 😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😵

Happy New Year to everyone here 🎉 Let's kick OCD's bum this year 💪

Oh wow OK thank you. It keeps trying to get me to go through it again, when I have a long break it's so strong the Urge to go over things. I do feel like I was trying to show ocd I was boss but unfortunately ocd always ends up finding it's way to the top and how it tricked me I don't know... It's managed to take me facing my fear and staying in the moment and turned it into "you intended to do this, you are now evil"

I think it was about religious ocd but anyway they were taking it literally too like me. I have been blocking it over Christmas and doing my best to see it for what it is.

But it's not atall what I'd want to say, I can't bare the thoughts and just in that moment I felt safe, this is what happens when I don't fear my every move...lucky me I lose either way as I've said before.

No it was the same subject, it's not all me. They were worried they said something about the spirit, that's where it came from. It was religious ocd forum.