Hello everyone..as some of you here know I have OCD. Like many, my themes keep changing and one of them is that of pedophilia.
Sometime back I saw a photo of friend, hugging her child and as you may infer this was a trigger for the chain of unsettling thoughts. Thoughts which made me feel yet again that I had misbehaved with my nieces in the past.
The state that I am in I am so scared to touch a child. I feel if I do touch a child, my next subsequent thoughts are of pedophilia which makes me feel sick in the stomach and leaves me unsettled. Oh that phase is horrible!
My question is - if someone with this disorder and this theme wishes to bear/raise a child, how does one do it? I mean it feels impossible because this disorder is a major obstacle. At this moment, it is stopping me and I am not sure if there will be a good time.
Thanks for your suggestion in advance. Stay safe.