AlexSmith

i have been on medication and came off of them because they wenrt doing anything and i had cbt for 2 months helped but , still struggling

Hello all . i have suffered with OCD since i was 12 years old. since i got into a relationship with my partner 7 months ago , Ocd has attack our relationship . she is very supportive but it is always getting me down . My current OCD obsession is Cheating ocd . When i go out in a social setting , i would hug some one or speak to someone and it would convince me what if have kissed the female person and cheated on my partner . it has happened at least once or twice a month for the past 7 months . it mostly happens when i have a drink but not to the extent of me being blackout drunk and cant remember anything it would happen after a few which is nothing , and has also happened when i have been sober as well . recently i went out with my friends all male , which are my best friends who i trust to go out with because they are all in a relationship to with their girlfriends . the problem was i got drunk and there are some fuzzy parts to the night i dont remember which scares me . i remember just about some female approached me on the night and i cant remember hardly who it was and my ocd has latched on to that and has convinced me i kissed her . because i cant remember it doubts the situation more . i asked my best friend who was out on the night with me and he said nothing happeed we were about a arm length away from you , and he said if anything did happen he would of had a go at with me because his girlfriend is my girlfriends best friends so we are all close . but his reassurance makes me still doubt like what if they wern't looking my way when this girl approached me for whatever reason . its just scary , because all the past ones i new they were stupid , even though i asked for reasuurence , and always got the answer no , nothing happened by the feamle over message . but because i was really drunk , and i am really ****** off i put my self in this situation , because i cant remeber some of the night for example this moment of the night its setting of all doubts and putting me in to a massive guilt and panic mode . i hate this , i cant stop worrying .

thanks for all of your replies , i appreciate it so much . Yes ashley i have had CBT therapy for a while now and it has helped . i was feeling better for a while until ive gone back to this thought , while i was out with my works firm , when i hugged the girl i went to school with . previous intrusive thoughts have happened after i have drunk small amounts of alcohol and hugged a girl i know and it would give me a thought and a image/vision of me kissing the person . when i know how silly it is , i still believe it . on all of the past ones i have gone out for reassurence on them and asked the person and they have all be false . The thought i have gone back to evolving the girl i hugged while i was sober , it had no images or scenarios , that it normally does , that's what has frightened me . For that reason was their no images/visions because i'm getting better at blocking them out ? My anxiety probably peaked while i was speaking to her aswell because she did look like she did want to kiss me but i kept far back as possible . so i guess its me doing my security OCD over the top checks when i hugged her which was the only point i gotten close to her . this is same cycle as the other intrusive thoughts . that instant did i or did you .

I'm having a bad time . I have no energy , not the same person i used to be which was happy , bubbly , outgoing and a person everyone used to have a good laugh with . I suffer with OCD and on medication sertraline . My Biggest OCD obsession is Cheating on my girlfriend . every month for the past 6 months i would have atleast one or two intrusive thoughts where i would be out in a social setting and it could be on the same day or night or the day after where i would get this thought in my head saying did you kiss her , did i kiss her , it would only happen after i hugged a girl on a social gathering . i went a little while without having a bad intrusive thought , so i powered up and went out with my work firm , i decided to stay away from alcohol because that was one of my biggest triggers . i saw a girl i went to school with on the night and we both hugged . and spoke for atleast 10 minutes . later on in the night not long after , it was like in my head saying oh no did i just kiss her ? i panicked and instantly wanted reassurence from her but i decided not to . but for the past 2 months i have been ruminating on this one because , there was no vision , no false memory which i got from all the other ones . this one was just the worry thought in my head saying oh did i just kiss her ? ? And i try to reconstruct what happened and i cant remember what ha[ppened and i couldnt remember what happened even the day after . it feels like my brain is trying to block it out . does this sound like a classic thought , because all the past were with images and visions but this one wasn't . im fed up with this now , im not happy with life .

I suffer with Cheating OCD which most of the time happens with False memory OCD I have had Intrusive thoughts/images/scinerios happening about cheating once or twice a month for the past 6 months due to a big change in my life my girlfriend . None of them have become true , because i have asked for reassurance which i know is a bad thing to do . I was doing really well until the other weekend , until i attended my aunties 40th birthday party . all family and friends were their . I found this Lady at the party very very attractive , I didn't even speak to her because i didn't even know her , and she was with her husband as well . I'm going to go into detail here but in the morning i was very horny because my girlfriend was away , and i performed masturbation on my self and thought about this attracted lady at the party . obviously while this act , a vision/image came into my mind of me having sex with her in the venue's toilet and i didn't think much of it at the time but later on in the day it made me feel guilty and made me think that this was a real memory . i Didn't even speak or flirt or go anywhere near the lady so why is this making me believe this , image / vision ? It seems to always happen whenever i drink alcohol it makes me believe i am some sort of womaniser cheater but i'm not , would the best option not to drink alcohol ? but iv'e been told that's avoidance which will make my life smaller . i'm not drinking to the point where i don't know what i'm doing , it just seems like i can't enjoy my self anymore , The thoughts and false memories it gives me , i panic then later on think , how ridiculous they are and believe that they cant be possibly true but still make me obsess over it and make me think that they are true much appreciated Alex .

all my past intrusive thought / images have always been false because ive gone out and asked for reasurence , but why do i always react to them when i get one even though i know their false ?

Why is it that some people , which is including me . When a Intrusive thought attacks us , its makes us believe that we actually acted on it ? For example my Obsession is cheating OCD alot of the time , I could be at a gathering and have some alcohol or not even have any . 'The most recent one was at a family gathering and i had about 5 beers which is nothing , i felt a little tipsy , but the next day i had a image/vision of me having sex with this attractive lady at the gathering she was with her husband for christ sake . What i dont understand is even though how stupid the intrusive thought /story is OCD is trying to throw at you , you still believe it could of happened even thought your 99.9 % sure it didnt happen ? Im fed up with it now but dealing with them alot better , some days i feel great and then days i feel really low . what really upsets me is , i cant enjoy going to social gatherings anymore , drinking alcohol , and letting loose now and again . i love my girlfirend to bits but i guess its OCD that latches on to what you care about alot .

i know i was masturbating over the lady at the party , but why did a image of me having sex with in the toilet pop into my head it frightened me . is that the intrusive thought , the image , then the anxiety , then follows the compulsions and reassurence ?

I suffer From cheatingOCD . i went to a family gathering on friday night . i had a few drinks and remember the whole night . there was a very attractive lady their with her husband and i didnt no who they were . i didnt even speak to them or anything . the next day i woke up . i am going to go into detail here i felt very horny because my girlfriend was away for the weekend . And i performed masturbation on my self . Im guilty that i thought about this lady who was at my gathering and while i was doing this aha . sorry for going into to much detail . but a vision came up while i was masturbating over her , it was a vision of me and her having sex in the venues toilet . i didnt even speak to the lady or the couple so i dont understand that its making me believe this is a real memory , i have had visions like this before kissing and sex after drinks at a party even sober times at a party aswell what i believed to be true but they never turned out to be true . but it felt different this time because it was during masturbation . it really scared me . anyone else had this happened to them . it effects me and my relationship .

my obsession is cheating OCD , whoever i hug , later on it tries to convince me i kissed the person . none of them have ever been true but its starting to confuse me now . My intrusive thoughts have started off with WHAT IF alot of the times then created a false memory . Recently they have started off with Did i just , or did i ? , is this still considered doubting a situation ? much appreciated , alex .

I found out a false memory was not true tonight after a long 6 months obsessing over it ! OCD sucks !!!! IT drains the hell out of me !! all i can say is now im not going to get drunk no more ! only a few beers in a comfortable enviroment so i dont get any triggers ! Onwards and upwards from now concentrate on my relationship with my Beautiful partner !! just like to say thankyou to everyone for help on here . if i need help in the near future ill be straight on here because you lot are so helpful much appreciated alex !

anyone ? can a intrusive thought/ false memory make you think you have actually committed the image / vision ?

the false memory felt so real , and it makes me believe it . it just came in to my mind out of know where .

it happened 3 days after the party , i deffienlty would of remembered if something bad happened before that i know thats a reassurence question but it makes sense , thioguh

still dont understand why , the sex thought just flashed a image / vision in my head suddenly it just had effected me so much , literally can't cope with why it just happened out of thin air , i hate it . its effecting my daily routines at work and have constant feeling of guilt , because it makes you beilieve that it might of happened . and mainly it effects me nd my relationship with my partner .