So I'm currently 20 years old, and I've have OCD from a young age, about age 13, which stemmed from being over protective of my siblings, then as time went on turned into contamination OCD, HOCD, being scared I'm schizophrenia.
But now I'm dealing with POCD and this is scaring me. I'm now 20 and let me say I'll never in my life hurt/harm a child. But I was on Instagram yesterday and someone I followed posted a pic of their daughter, and I started getting intrusive thoughts about her. So to relieve the thoughts I masturbated to it and felt guilt instantly. IDK if this is hormones, POCD, or if I'm actually a P.
Also I generally masturbate to straight porn, but for some reason on occasion I get an urge to type in google "girls in stockings" and masturbate to it. With the girls generally being under 13. I realize it's wrong whilst masturbating and usually close the page before orgasming. I'm just stressed rn why do I get these urges??