I am so thankful I have found your forum online and hoping for some advice.
My boyfriend of 5 years has OCD (mainly contamination) and it has become so bad and he has not worked for some time now and getting into debt. When we first met I just thought he was more clean than most guys but then living together things got significantly worse and now most days he is unable to leave the flat.
He sees his OCD as a big secret he has to hide from the world including me although over the last year he has admitted to me that he is mentally unwell and opened up to me about the intrusive thoughts and how trapped he feels. I feel awareness is the first step to healing but sadly he refuses to get any professional help as he will not have this on his NHS record.
He has become anxious, depressed, over-sensitive, emotionally detached and often filled with angry outbursts and screaming.
He is super intelligent and believes that no doctor will be able to understand his mind and help him. His parents took him for one session of counselling at at 14 for this problem and he just told the doctor all the 'right' answers so she would let him go and then kept his issues a secret from his family for the rest of his life.
His family are so kind and caring and I know that if they knew they would do anything to help him and he does respect them. I once mentioned that I might tell them so we can get him help and his response was that he would rather terminate himself than for anyone to know or to open up to anyone about it. This has left me feeling so scared and helpless. I'm just not sure I can live like this anymore, watching him suffer, depressed and unable to function or do any simple tasks or chores has gotten to me and the past 3 years have been really tough.
I love and care for him and even if the relationship does not last I want him to break free from this trapped life. I have mentioned these forums, books and websites but he just seems like he has made up his mind that nobody can help.
My questions are:
Can anyone recommend some of the best private doctors for OCD in London? From what I am reading I think the NHS is not the way to go for him.
With severe OCD like this is a mixture of both medication and CBT they way forward?
Has anyone else had experience of a family intervention for OCD or had a loved one refusing help?
Any other advice for helping someone to get help?
Thanks in advance.