Froggy

How do I contact Ashley? I have given him the link to the forum so I hope he'll use it. How do I chivvy the NHS therapy? I wanted to be involved with the private therapy because I felt suspicious that my husbsnd would still be telling reasonable half truths... if you know what I mean. He's long been in denial and still is in some ways though he has made huge bounds forwards in even agreeing to see the GP. So have to be grateful for small mercies. I don't have anywhere I could go in terms of leaving. I could stay with friends for a few days, but no friendship could withstand me and 3 very bouncy kids intruding their life for any great length of time!! Husbands relatives all live several hours drive away, and my parents are no longer with us... ?

Hi, first time poster... my husband developed OCD in his 30s after a bereavement. It was subtle at first but in the last 5-6 years our relationship has been dominated by the OCD. We tried a private therapist and she did bereavement counselling first, but when she started the CBT, my husband made excuses not to go back. I've recently persuaded him to go on SSRI but it doesn't seem to help. He's on a waiting list for NHS therapy but was told 6 month wait even before lockdown so how long now??? He won't touch me or the 3 kids, he won't sit on the sofa or at the table. I'm not allowed to clean certain areas in the house and he can't do it either because "cleaning aerosols the dirt." So if i try he gets angry and says I'm doing it to wind him up. We're not allowed to open windows and he showers for about 3-4 hours per day so the house is damp. If I or the kids go out even if its just into our garden we all have to change and shower Immediately on returning or he gets angry. He self harms, he won't eat/drink normally to reduce his toilet exposure. If I touch his clothes or his side of the bed it all has to be washed at 90degrees. He won't leave the house unless he's fully cover so it's only his eyes showing even in summer weather. And he quadruple gloves to go out too. His anger is directed at the house and things, but he has threatened me with violence on a number of occasions. I feel like I'm living with an addict and I'm worried about the effect on the kids, the cost of repairing and replacing broken things, the lack of maintainence in the house, the fact he can't work, I have to work more to cover costs and the anxiety about leaving him with the kids.. I don't think he'd physically hurt them but emotionally.... they don't want me to go... but can't risk the house being repossessed. At the end of my tether, people have suggested I leave, but he wouldn't cope on his own. And when someone is housebound practically where would he go?... I feel like someone married to a gambler or an alcoholic, they promise to change, beg you to stay, but are powerless to keep the promise and the cycle goes on and gets worse and worse.