Help! I'm nearly 6 months pregnant and my mental health has been pretty bad throughout - I stopped taking medication when I found out I was pregnant because I'd just finished months of therapy that I thought had been really effective but now I can't remember a time my mental health has ever felt this bad. I'm being seen by the perinatal mental health service and also getting some therapy from Mind but I'm on holiday at the moment and my OCD is completely destroying it.
As well as being pregnant we're in the process of buying a new house - and one of the things I've been fixated on is that it was too 'easy' to get an offer accepted on the house and therefore something bad will happen if we move there. Last weekend I was trying so hard not to think this that I couldn't really think about much at all. Then I started worrying about dying, or someone I love dying, and also the fact that everyone dies and it's terrifying and if half my life is behind me already then the next half contains loads of scary stuff. I've subsequently spent a lot of the holiday so far reading about how to make peace with death, whether people are scared when they die, whether old people worry about dying, and then reading about people with terminal cancer to see how scared they are.
It's absolutely horrific, and all the while I have a baby happily wriggling away and feel so guilty that I'm not just enjoying this time.
Any support/commiseration much appreciated, I've really got myself in a mess.
