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angels

Bulletin Board User
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    88
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  • OCD Status
    Sufferer

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    ireland

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  1. Taurean you are a very kind person taking the time out to reply to my post I am sure you are a very valued member on here. I have had OCD a very long time and do well in combating it mostly but when I start to feed it it grows and gets stuck and refocusing is key in this situation but when it goes as far a a week it's like a rat on a wheel. It has so benefited me to see it laid out like you have thank you so much for lifting me up ...
  2. Thank you taurean I have been having an intrusive thought about a real event that happened it was a year ago was speaking to my therapist about it a week ago we have 8 weekly appointments now which is great but it's just latched on to the subject again and because it was real event OCD has latched on and it's harder for me to disregard I have been doing so well but this has stuck solid for over a week now I am so anoid. If I treat it as ocd if be fine. I had a drunken words with my cousin one nite and she was agressive with me I cried as too much to drink I am mostly confident outgoing and assertive. OCD latched on am I weak or strong could I handle it is she attacked me I a strong enough to take a stand was crying a weakness do others think I am weak etc etc. It's ridiculous even when I try to tell myself I am only human being scared doesn't mean weak. I go to the gym to burn stress and find myself doing weights or boxing etc as a way to reassure myself that id be able to take care of myself but the doubt goes around and around. Need to see it as ocd and doubt and belive in myself can't shift gear seams so important really embarrassing and laughable to see it in black and white.
  3. Intrusive thoughts keep intruding the past few days whatever I do to shift them it's like they won't let go there are stuck in gear. Then the doubt is so strong it's hard to shift the gear. The same thing over and over. it tough sometimes xx hope it lifts soon
  4. I really appreciate this post today I come on the forum when I am having a tough week which I have OCD wise this week. I must keep ignoring not buying into the ocd and refocusing hopeful it will lift again very soon had 5 good weeks ocd in control and two were it on top of me. It may win the battle sometimes but we will win the war thank you for your solid fantastic advise
  5. What a Great post very informative and accurate seeing all intrusive thoughts as ocd and refocusing works well for me. I really appreciate this post today thank you the tough part is OCD latches on to everything. Mine questions myself and becomes intrusive gets stuck and when it reached this stage every time I refocus away it pulls me back in. On a good run I can refocus easily any tips on ignoring the doubts when it feels so real and you get stuck thank you
  6. It's typical OCD when you want to relax or enjoy something it flares up like a bully ignore the thoughts and refocus each time don't listen to it .
  7. Thank you polar bear i really appreciate your reply. I really want to beat ocd I have had it from I was 18 and I am 37 now I did beat it before or had it under control for a few years so I know it is possible when you use all your techniques. It is so tough at times and I feel OCD is so hard to control sometimes and makes life tough if I ease up on my technique it just comes straight back it's as if Il have to continue my whole life doing it but I am hopeful that I will get stuck into it and continue to make improvements slow and steady
  8. My technique is no reacting to the thoughts not getting into them and refocusing and no matter how much the OCD thoughts come I nip them in the butt and refocus. I breath and try not to over analysis the thoughts are get into debates I try to recognize as ocd refocus not reacting is hard but it then lifts and I feel good. The OCD thoughts are about my technique what if I am doing this wrong what if I am not doing it right it's as if I won't get relic until I speak to my therapist and she reassured me I am doing it correct. My compulsions are listening to the thoughts rumination what if this technique wrong etc. The therapist said my technique is correct but because I am doing everything i can it's as if I do the technique for three four weeks feel amazing then the doubt creep in and I let it all in again I become so stressed I can't do my technique. I've had these stuck thoughts for 3 weeks when I refocus I feel good then u get doubts therapist said I've been doing well but we need to tackle the two weeks to break it done by looking into the thoughts now my OCD is sky high because I am thinking is she going to change my technique or can I keep what works OCD is attacking my technique is like to think she is just going to add to my technique and I'll continue doing what I do how do I get back on track it's 4weeks before I see her and I am very stresses thank you polar bear
  9. So stressed trying every thing and feel stuck. Keeping doubting my technique because my therapist said she would try something else in new year so instead of doing what works I have thoughts and doubts surrounding it my thoughts and doubts are stuck I feel so so stressed and I have another 4 weeks to next appointment. I wish I could not let OCD affect my technique and keep going it seems to me when I do technique I am well then If I let it in I am back to square one. Has anyone beat ocd on there own and what techniques do you use thank you
  10. Gemma Thank you for your reply I have been in therapy a long time an I use different techniques not reacting breathing and refocus all my compulsion are in my head oversnalysing reassurance seeking reacting I go hard on the technique and feel amazing then I let the doubt creep in and it knocks me right back it's like the technique needs to be done every day of my life and twice as hard on bad days. Stress weakens us all and I've just changed job and Christmas. I try not to come onto the site to often only when I am bad and need support I truly appreciate those who are on the site. Think I am panicking Caz I am not seeing therapist until end of January jus need to stop panicking think I see a therapist as reassurance to keep me on track it's tough going. Il stick to what works for me until I see her again I just pray to God I don't the doubt wreck my technique thank you gemma
  11. I having a tough few weeks OCD I do my technique of not getting into the thoughts nipping them and refocusing and this works for me then I let the doubt in and bang I am back to extreme anxiety my therapist says there's a pattern of 4 good weeks and 2 OCD I see her every six weeks because it's Christmas I am not seeing her until end of January as money tight. Last time I seen her she said in the new year we will look into the thoughts more to try and break the cycle of the two bad weeks this has put my anxiety up as my tecnique is my one solid thing that works well.I do my tecnique get 4 wks then bang I start to over analysis my technique because she said we will look at the thoughts so I start to doubt my technique and because I am so stressed I cannot get it under control please help me see the wood for the trees I know my technique is my one solid but I am so stressed and doubt so strong because I am thinking about her changing it though she did not say that she just said we would tackle the 2 weeks should I continue with what works for me and ignore doubt why can't I go it alone
  12. I worried about this when I was pregnant I have twins who are nearly ten I was so determined to keep my OCD under control when they came and when they arrived I was so busy I was almost ocd free a few years OCD is managed with determination and solid technique my OCD is up at the moment but I wanted to reach out
  13. Going on a hen tomorrow with cousins my anxiety levels are well and truly up. I have had OCD from the last time we where out together and I had a row with one of them my hubby picked me up and I was crying as one had got agressive with. My OCD theme had changed to was I weak or strong could I protect myself if I was in a physical fight etc etc what does me being fearful mean about me.being able to feel strong enough to take care of myself is important to me as having confidence and assertive this is OCD fueled. I am so embarrassed I have talked to my mum brother dad and husband and confessed my fears seeked reassurance and it's made me feel worse. I can't seem to switch it off and I feel ashamed to have showed weakness by admitting my fears which I feel maybe OCD related. I do not want to feel fear I want to feel strong in myself no body got what I said they thought I wanted to be agressive when I said I don't want to fight with anyone but I wanted to know I'd have the strength and courage to take a stand for myself and these thought where making me feel weak I feel so anxious and embarrassed I am so tired of feeling afraid of things it switches from one fear to the next i get on top of one ..my theme of OCD is all to with am I confident I am assertive am I able to stand up for myself as all these things are important to me and then OCD gets triggered by situations like these I have doing a lot of work to make myself feel confident etc Need help here to calm myself down. I am so upset I have spoke about these things plus I've made my cousins look bad by talking about her behaviour need help go get on track.told my husband how I was feeling and he feeds it by going into safety behaviours if trouble breaks out I tell him I think my OCD is playing on this and he brings up I read your ocd diary years before I know the way your mind works. This makes me feel worse as I know there was some crazy stuff in there I got rid of it years ago I don't even dare to ask him what he read one I am angry he did it and two ocd fears are not real and he said it disgusted him. I think he feeds on my fears also because he knows I love a laugh and it's his way of making sure I behave. So sorry OCD fuelled post also I was reassurance seeking and bringing the subject up to anyone who would listen
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