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angels

Bulletin Board User
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    Sufferer

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    Female
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    ireland

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  1. Thank you very much ive been working on it for work. i really dont understand how they didnt see they were def shaking. But nobody noticed. Ocd says oh but you stepped behind podium mayb nxt time etc theyll see. But your right researching reassurance seeking. Confessing all ocd traits and the importance sticks.this is the tough part of ocd for me i really need to refocus and not worry about next time xx thanks for you time very kind
  2. Thank you so much for your reply you know how ocd focuses on what goes wrong and not the bigger picture. I will look into a grounding tecnique sounds like a great idea. Its the what ifs and doubt ocd creates but i will have to work on doing it and controllling my reaction. Best of luck to your working on your confidence with public speaking also xx
  3. I did a presentation at work in frount of my bosses and professionals etc as an ocd suffer i went over and over practising my speech preparing. Did all the management of nerves stuff went into the room did breathing staying calming and focusing on the other talkers etc. Staying out of my own head. Was sweating but ignored that. Walked confidently to the frount faced the audience and felt my legs shaking i thought oh no people can notice. I cracked a joke and moved myself behind the podium and put all my energy into giving the speech. Which went really well. When i came off i started to ask orhers did they notice my shaky legs. Reassurance seeking they said no the didnt notice i was surprised i thought it was very obvious. I spent the rest of the day even though lots of people thought it was very good reassurance seeking and confessing. Ive speak two weeks researching how to control shaky legs etc. All ocd traits but i genuinely want to make sure my legs dont shake as i find the embarassing. I know breathing works and refocusing. Not sure about movement . Just looking tips on controlling anxious body during big speeches as it part of my work and important to me xx
  4. Thank you il take a note of what youve said and speak to my therapist next week i would do anything i need to get better.
  5. Thank you for you reply taurean i feel so tired and emotionally drained. When i apply the tecnique of seeing all intrusive thoughts and doubts as ocd and not my truth it makes me feel better and gives me the strenght to ignore fight back and not do other compulsions.I come back to myself again then the urge to attach meaning to the event and what it means about me is what is destroying me the thoughts and doubts are constant. I know ocd has latch to the event and if i did not have ocd it would be gone.The issue being it is a real event and telling myself this is ocd and the thoughts go but how is it this happened.reopening of the event and trying to reframe it as saying i am a confident woman and assertive like an affirmation agsinst ocd.there is plenty of evidence to prove it or i try saying crying is normal its not a weakness just because i have ocd and feel fear does not i am capable. Then i cant seem to let the importance of the situation go. Its stuck. I find it harder to ignore. I was doing really with the tecnique. But i compulsively go back over it again. I not sure what is meant by ocd going against true core belives. Taurean. My issue is not being able to ignore the thoughts and let the situation fade. I am just so scared that my therapist is going to think i am untreatable. We had been doing really well and progressing but it never goes away all i am doing is managing it. But this week i have opened the flood gates.
  6. Need to get on track feel so helpless right now and stuck... how do i let the importance go
  7. I am sorry to hear your having such a tough time. It really is relentless sometimes i am struggling myself at present but on a stronger day i would say please dont lose hope the sun will shine again. Try to see your thoughts as ocd and stop your compulsions such as reacting to the thoughts rumminating and reassurance seeking. Refocusing will give you rest and resist the urge to re exam i hope this helps.
  8. Struggling badly at present and sliding backwards. i am finding it so hard to stick to my tecnique i had been out to every eight weeks in therapy and now back to 4 as my ocd is really strong and i feel out of control. Rummination is a constant. My ocd is attached to an event 1 year ago its stuck everyday its there.when i fight it and say this is my ocd reacting to the event and i ignore it i feel good then the i cant ignore the thoughts and relate it back to the event as part of the evidence. The event i have wrote before was a night out drunk and having words with my cousin. Who got agressive and into my face and i cried she has been known to get physical. This triggered my ocd really bad and for a year it rarely leaves my mind i get intrusive thoughts about the event. It is really important to me to beable to stand up for myself and i do and can but the ocd is making me doubt myself and ocd has latched onto i tell myself i am a confident person and am assertive and ocd brings it back to the event as well if you are then why did you cry. Why where you afraid etc. I have had ocd for 20 years and managed to beat a theme i had for ten yrs and the other for 5 year the topics change. I have had ocd about confidence as a topic so dont want to get into that as it triggers. My therapist has been with me along time now and said it is ocd and nothing else ..she said it may be time to try erp i i do exposure as I dont avoid my cousin we talk go gym etc. My issues is that i find it hard tonlet the situation go and the meaning ocd has attach to the event and what it says about me its making me ill. I am so sick of the battle and wonder why do i keep picking the scab. How do i stop relating back to the event.
  9. Anxiety makes the memory poor especially when all your energy is used trying to beat ocd. On a day when i am ontop of ocd my mind is peaceful and clear when i sm having a bad episode of ocd my mind like mush cant focus or remeber words x
  10. Ignore your intrusive thoughts and try to see it as ocd and not you. This will help create a little ditance between ocd and you try not to enter the debate and refocus until it unsticks a lifts x
  11. Koala i have suffered from pure o for a very long time and i can very much relate to your post intrusive thoughts random thoughts and the meaning ocd puts on them the importance the doubt and the fear of letting it go. The being stuck.The tough part is seeing the thoughts as ocd and not reacting to them knowing you feel this way because of ocd. That you are not you thoughts or your fears. To refocus shift the gear until it lifts and not be drawn into the arguement
  12. Leif please do not be worrying i have triggered myself and i totally appreciate your post and what youve wrote is true . I did not mention before what my ocd topic was. I greatly appreciate your response and kindness x the situation involving the nite out did trigger an old core belife so you are right and ocd has had a field day x
  13. I have an understanding about a core belife but not in relation to ocd i would be worried knowing too much as my ocd would home in on it and keep me stuck probably i did go down this route before which lead my ocd to get worse. The nature of beast x
  14. My ocd topic is about self esteem and being able to look after myself its been ongoing this form for 8 years so i get alot of intrusive thoughts and doubts reference this topic reading your post is a little triggering for me. But i greatly appreciate your response and you are right in what you are saying. I have worked hard on my self esteem over the years and feel the issue is ocd and nothing else. making mountains out of mole hills if i get any normal human thoughts about this topic ocd has a field day. My self esteem and being able to cope if extremely important to me which is why ocd has latched onto it. Because it is a subject with no difinate answers and alot of grey ocd has a field day. I do know that when i am not beliving the negative thoughts i feel really good and my self esteem is good. Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to reply xx
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