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Everything posted by taurean

  1. Can you do this by creating a separate topic please Handy?
  2. Break Free is a very good self-help book, and will help you "map out" how your own OCD works and how to tackle it. Plus in the appendix is the template for a relapse recovery blueprint, which is excellent. My own one is saved onto my computer and easily updated.
  3. I truly believe that the right blend of therapy, plus listening to believing and actioning what we are told to do, leads to recovery. How much that recovery is may vary, but there is every chance that it will be significant. I am going to highlight again listening to believing and actioning what we are told to do, because this is key to recovery. We have to walk the walk, work the homework, make the thinking and behavioural changes. Only we can decide if we are going to do it now, or carry on suffering for another twenty years before we do it. What's it going to be, Phil?
  4. And If there is to be such a thing, could it be posted on a new, separate, topic thread, not on Rachel's or another sufferer’s topic thread?
  5. In the doctors practice I used when we lived in London, two out of the four doctors with whom I had dealings thought I was a risk. But they had asked me a specific question as to what form my OCD took, and I said harm thoughts. They asked whether it was harm to me or to others, and I honestly said others, and that's when they thought me a risk, showing their ignorance of how that theme of OCD works. I The two others, the senior partners in the practice, were keen to learn more from me about OCD, which I was able to do. And this would benefit other sufferers who might be patients so very useful awareness.
  6. I am not sure where the psychiatrists come in to it, but over the years I have consulted personally with two psychiatrists (as required by my medical insurance provider) overseeing CBT performed by three clinical psychologists, plus I at my own expense, after health insurance funding ran out, consulted with a fourth clinical psychologist. In actual fact, what ultimately worked for me was a combination of CBT, The Four Steps, Mindfulness, Love Kindness Meditation and the collective wisdom of the charity OCD-UK and its members.
  7. Three people taking an adverse view prior to explanation is neither a crowd - nor a problem. Because their misunderstanding is in fact easy, with a reasonable understanding of OCD, to explain: and this then becomes another gain re awareness-spreading.
  8. A friend told me I have the gift to make people laugh. That made me smile. 

    1. lostinme


      Thats nice Roy, it goes to show what a nice person you are :)

  9. That approach I didn't feel helpful when the OCD was targeting my true core character values and alleging the opposite. Why should I agree with it, when it's clearly lying? I am not personally a fan of that approach. Plus the idea that taking the Schwartz approach as a short-term re-assurance , or long-term compulsion, doesn't sit with me either. The idea is to use it until we have re-programmed our brain away from focusing on the obsessional thought, nothing more. We have then shifted focus away from the damaging obsessional default. But the good news is there are the two methods. We don't just have one choice.
  10. Why not make a note of what we have said here? If the OCD rears its head again, then you will know what to do without posting. And when you get the hang of that, you will be able to discard the note.
  11. Handy, you have said this before and we disagreed. Knowing how to treat OCD, given the benefit of an experienced therapist, may look easy, but actually going through the thinking and behavioural changes necessary to recover is really hard. Plenty of people only have OCD and no other significant mental disorder. But for those that do have other mental health issues as well, it is important to get these uncovered, and a treatment programme set up encompassing them too.
  12. Hi there. Just took a look at some of your previous content so now understand. Challenging those catastrophic thoughts is one way to deal with this. OCD will always follow a worst case scenario, but why should the worse happen? Real life doesn't work like that, it works on maybes, maybe nots - and with those outlooks people can take the stance your nephew is. I did this myself a few years back. I had a two week referral for a procedure to check for cancer. My doctor didn't think it was, but needed to have it checked. I used to worry about all sorts of things. But I worked hard psychologically and managed to overcome that. So with this two weeks, I applied that thinking. I put it out of my mind, and was only a tad concerned, on the day, to make sure I kept alert so I didn't misunderstand the procedures. The results were clear. Last year my wife was ill and we had two speedy referrals, and I helped her challenge her health phobias and keep busy on other things whilst waiting. Did I worry she had something terminal? I thought she might, but I was calm, adopting a "whatever will be will be approach", which worked well. For me, there was no purpose in worry, it would only make me ill. The checks came back with diagnoses of conditions which needed to be managed with medication. Julie has improved well and the meds are great. Taking the worst case approach, as per your OCD, just makes you anxious and feeling ill. Don't look to carry out compulsions like Googling - compulsions only make things worse. Try taking that "maybe, maybe not" approach that has served us so well.
  13. OCD can do all kinds of things, and is typically made worse when we are feeling stressed. If we can take control of the stress, then at the same time we will be rebuilding some resilience to help us to tackle the OCD. So maybe discuss with your hubby what your stresses are and what you might do about them, then look to Impliment the best ideas.
  14. Firstly, seeking to counter an intrusion with saying "I don't know and that's OK" each time isn't the way forward, as it's a neutralising compulsion. Just leave those thoughts be. They are only thoughts. Remember that old saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words may never harm me?" Thoughts won't harm us if we don't give belief to them. Spot intrusions , then refocus away. Keep gradually (not continually) doing this until not paying any attention to them becomes the norm. That's the refocus and distraction element of CBT. The other important element of the B - behavioural - element of CBT is exposure and response prevention. Having learned the C - cognitive - side of OCD (what it is, how it works, and why our themes aren't true) we need then to fully expose ourselves to the trigger intrusions, whilst bearing this in mind. It works best I think in short, structured, sessions in a quiet private environment. As we ride the anxiety response, but remind ourself that there isn't a real threat, over several sessions the anxiety should begin to ease away. And when the intrusions lose their power, they should reduce in both strength and frequency.
  15. There is no real threat here, only the threat that your OCD'd brain is conjuring up. Stop listening to those intrusions, get yourself busy and refocusing away. Under the "rule" that OCD is trying to impose on you, all plumbers would be major contamination-spreaders. Can you see how ridiculous that thought is? Plumbers would, effectively, have to be controlled in a completely unworkable way. They would have to decontaminate themselves, before going to their next job, by showering or bathing in the very equipment you would deem they have contaminated! Should they carry around a portable steriliser for their tools? The "rules" of OCD are designed to restrict our daily lives and cause fear, distress and anxiety. When we learn to not obey those rules we will start to get better.
  16. What you describe is typical of sexual theme OCD. End of story really. The route towards recovery from OCD needs us to first accept that we are, at least probably, suffering from OCD. The disorder will toss in doubt, lies, unwanted thoughts and feelings to try and keep us within its power. But by learning in CBT to see this, not believe or connect with it, and not carry out compulsions such as you are doing, we can follow the path to recovery. I liken it to the allegorical route, beset with obstacles, leading to the celestial city that Christian must overcome in John Bunyan's "The Pilgrim's Progress". But it is a route well-travelled, and a route that hordes of sufferers have taken successfully. So others can do so too.
  17. I think there are two mental angles to when we are ill. There's the side where we feel weakened, perhaps stressed, and are as a consequence more vulnerable to OCD - particularly if we are not able to distract with our normal daily duties. And I reckon there's another side, where the very fact that we have to think about our illness becomes a distraction, forcing the OCD in the background. I found that I belonged in the latter camp.Though of course I had no desire to have another illness to feel better about my OCD! But what this did additionally show me was the benefit of distraction in refocusing our mind away from the obsessional thinking and the carrying out of compulsions.
  18. I get the feeling that, like me originally, many of us find the forums via the Internet, but don't realise just what a wealth of interesting material, guidance and help, is available from our charity OCD-UK's website and included online shop. So do take a look at www.ocduk.org It's wonderful stuff, and the books available are chosen to educate teach and help sufferers, and their loved ones who care about them and want to understand and help them, towards recovery.
  19. Brainlock was a game-changing read for me. First it explained the author's view on what happens in the brain during an OCD attack. Not everyone agrees with Jeffrey Schwartz on this, but it made massive sense to me. And I certainly experienced the "Brainlock" of the title with my constantly-repeating intrusive thoughts. The Four Steps is a great method, for me, on top of - in addition to - cognitive behavioural therapy.
  20. It's sad to here what you say Angst. It so happens that here we live near a mental hospital, in turn close by the site of a much larger one. So our community tends to be understanding of people with mental problems, and I have met here people who worked there. Some of the behaviours of outpatients or former inmates are unusual, such as the woman who will stand still for half an hour in a nearby courtyard. But we all show understanding and leave her be. On my own awareness-spreading programme, I have yet to encounter more than three adverse reactions. Two were inexperienced doctors who thought I might be a threat - I explained how my OCD works, thus spreading awareness One also saw it as dangerous. I like to think " it's the way I tell 'em" that has kept that number down😉 Seriously, I do think there is something in that. I paint a picture that draws sadness pathos and empathy, telling it how it really is for sufferers and all affected by their OCD. And explain just how many people are affected.
  21. Trying to control the thoughts only strengthens them Ignoring them, refusing to believe or connect with them, then refocusing away, will gradually weaken them. So hopefully you can see what you need to do, instead of what you are actually doing.
  22. My new lawn has "taken" so I can start mowing it shorter, so less frequently. 

    1. taurean


      And the good news is, it's only a third the extent of grass of the old lawn :smileys-gardening-147427: 

      So more time for us to sit outside, enjoying the garden 🍵 

  23. When I see Handy's profile pick as a last poster on a thread, I am concerned. I feel the likelihood of an unhelpful post is high, so feel obliged to take a look and, if need be, respond. I have my own rule about entering someone else's thread - if I can't bring something helpful worthwhile and beneficial, to the original or a subsequent poster, to it, then I leave it be.
  24. I think the route to go down is to accept the probability that our intrusive thoughts are, however frightening, only the "worthless nonsense" of OCD. Then we can stop "trying to work it out". When we consistently learn not to pay attention to/give belief to intrusions, they will lose power and frequency. This is key to recovery, it really is, in my opinion as one who has gone through the process. For me, triggers used to seem to be everywhere, and intrusive thoughts - in an episode of OCD - would almost drive me crazy. Now? I rarely experience them. And if I do, they are simply eased away and out of mind. That's the true power of CBT. Used properly and consistently it really works.
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