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About taurean

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  • Type of OCD

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    Northampton, England
  • Interests
    Olympics (especially London 2012),Athletics,Swimming,Photography, Astronomy, Archaeology, Antiques Programmes on TV,Art. Choral and Classical Music, Jazz, Fishing, Aerobic Exercise, Gardening, National Trust, Wildlife

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  1. You can't be sure, but you can seek to recognise that the demand for doubt and certainty is the OCD at work, and latch on to that. This is I think the best technique - act "as if" that is just the OCD at work, and gently but firmly steer your thoughts away.
  2. taurean

    The Four Steps

    PolarBear is right. But when we are locked into this repetitive loop of thinking and urges to carry out compulsions (itself the evidence of OCD at work) the doubts and the assertions seem so powerful that we cannot break from them - meaning of course we give more belief to them, make them stronger, creating a circle of distress which only maintains this repetitive loop. Can you see and understand that now? You need a plan. So here is one to work on. Remember what we have told you - OCD wasn't known as "the doubting disease" for nothing - it hooks sufferers in, and maintains their distress by doubt, and the demand for certainty that it is all OCD. So, determine - despite the doubts - to play along with the idea that what WE, not the OCD, is saying is true. Don't listen to your own mind, and the doubts (that IS in fact the OCD at work). Hold onto that idea that it is all OCD - and if you find yourself slipping into performing compulsions, stop yourself. Each time your mind pulls you towards belief and carrying out compulsions, simply note this and gently but firmly ease your mind elsewhere and onto something beneficial and distracting. At first this will be really tough, and your mind will try and stop you. Resist, note and refocus away ; do this every time. It may feel like the biggest battle of your life - and it probably is. The mental struggle may tire you, you may feel distressed. But keep to the task, keep just noting and refocusing away. A key element of this plan is to listen to WE not the OCD. Maybe copy and paste this plan into the keep or equivalent notes folder in your phone - somewhere where you can find it to remind yourself of what to do. As my good friend lostinme would say You can do this Headwreck. Roy
  3. The disorder works the same, whatever the theme - it's our behavioural response that may be different. Change your behavioural response and you change your experience of the theme. Yes it's difficult, but - as I well know - perfectly possible 🙆.
  4. taurean


    Hi Angelmeadow. Plenty of people have similar fears to you. How nice that your therapist recommended our forums Beating OCD involves undertaking a journey of listening learning and changing behaviour. The good ship OCD-UK is a great one on which to be a passenger during that voyage of discovery and change
  5. Analysing the past to find out when our OCD started won't help - in fact it's another compulsion! And whether OCD evokes thoughts feelings or urges, it's our behavioural response that we must change. I was taught to be dismissive "Oh that's just my silly obsession". This is incredibly powerful - it claws back control from OCD, implies we have sussed it out, and seen that it creates what are in fact silly thoughts feelings or urges - nothing we should really treat as fearsome, threatening or repulsive. Then I was told to refocus without giving belief to, or connecting with, the obsessional thought. Now THESE are really essential CBT psychological tools for me, in challenging and overcoming OCD.
  6. Negative Bias OCD imposes on us unwanted negative obsessional intrusive thoughts, and seeks to impose restrictive rules by implying the need for avoidance. We can watch for negative bias forming in our general thinking, which quickly aids a downward spiral of mood and emotion. In therapy my therapist tested my "free association" of thoughts to see how much negativity was built up inside me - the store was amazingly large and had a really weakening affect on my resilience to OCD and made me sad and depressed. It follows that if we can shift that negative bias more towards the positive it may help us to challenge our OCD, and raise our mood. So let's take a look at our patterns of thinking and see how much negativity we are shocked to find. Then reappraise those experiences to look for, then apply, a more positive interpretation and course of action. When we learn how to do this it can become an autonomous action and gradually steer our bias back more towards the positive. OCD Rules Watch out for the illness forcing you towards avoidance and restrictions. Start to practice the compulsion of avoidance, and life will get more and more restricted. You may feel you can't meet with others, have a relationship, go out, earn a living. A good way to tackle this is to reject the shackle - don't buy into the need for the restriction, see it as OCD and refuse to play along. Rather, walk on that crack between paving stones; refuse to count a set number of times, do things symmetrically or in strange sequences. When we really get good at our cognitive understanding of OCD we learn that practising a ritual prevents nothing - and that our feared obsessions are in fact nothing more frightful than silly nonsensical mental chaff.
  7. Golly Emsie they start sports young these days I think the only sport I undertook at that age was playing in the sandpit I too hope it has been a better day for you lost.
  8. If I did that my doctor would have my guts for garters I genuinely need to get my weight down by at least 8kg (about a twelfth of my bodyweight) to get the risks of me contracting type 2 diabetes, heart disease or a stroke down. Maybe I need a sponsored weightlossathon
  9. They are just general silliness that happens. I don’t tend to get many as it happens, but I understand where you are coming from re the cat. My fondly remembered cat Edward took his devotion to me so seriously that he would wait on the gatepost watching for me to come home, and didn't trust the alarm clock - he would personally come and wake me up by dabbing at my shoulder till I woke. I wore the ongoing "stigmata" in terms of claw marks for that for a long time after he passed away.
  10. taurean

    The Four Steps

    Exactly. Once you understand, you can see that the OCD works the same way, whatever theme. Just with some themes, like paedophile, harm, sexual preference it targets our true core values and alleges the opposite to be true - causing severe distress.
  11. taurean

    The Four Steps

    It used to be known as "the doubting disease", which is apt, though it is an illness not a disease
  12. taurean

    The Four Steps

    I found it all made sense in OCD. I used to think I was mad, was ashamed of my thoughts - but with a very understanding doctor on a company healthscreen some 18 years ago, I opened up and told her what I was thinking and feeling. She immediately diagnosed OCD, and told me how I could get help through CBT. I haven't had a theme of OCD where there is all this demand for certainty and all this doubt but, from CBT and self-help, and being on these boards for over 5 years, I understand that form now too. This is where the first two of the four steps can then help us after the CBT. Once we can identify the OCD, we can label and re-attribute, without giving belief or connecting. And when we don't do that, intrusions ease and we can do the refocusing part then revalue.
  13. Thoughts are just thoughts and will drop into our minds, and strange, clearly silly, connections will be made. This is, as Caramoole says, normal. They only become a problem if a certain 3-letter acronym grabs hold and turns them into something that sticks and raises threat fear or revulsion, causing a compulsion response and distress. I once had the thought that I would be tremendously successful, make absolutely pots of money and retire at fifty. That is pretty silly, and maybe I was, and maybe still am, a weany bit too confident
  14. taurean

    The Four Steps

    It's an obsession, and that's it. No need for fanfares, drum rolls. Many post that "they needed to explain more, they don't want to mislead readers" - all pointless, because one of the features that to me "outs" the illness is seeing that posted - plus it seems that we can uncloak the OCD in other's experiences, but not in our own ( for me another proof of the illness). You don't I think need to spend money on more therapy - you just need to accept and put in practice what you have been told. You are batting on behalf of the wrong team - the OCD team. Time to switch to the sufferers recovery team, and bowl OCD a few tricky balls - put it on the back foot. Believe what you are being told. Leave the intrusions be, work on cutting out your carrying out of compulsions. This will be really challenging, but believe me there is, like on " Pointless " a red line, and when you break through that everything gets easier, the thoughts and urges start to lose their power. Only we sufferers can work to change our cognitive and behavioural response to OCD. The best CBT therapist for OCD in the whole world cannot help us if we don't believe them and implement what they tell us to do.
  15. taurean

    The Four Steps

    Everything you have declared is suggestive of OCD. As a said earlier, The Four Steps is of use only when we are understanding of how OCD works and affects us by learning and applying CBT - and we believe that, not what the OCD is telling us. A situation happened where a man was attracted to you. Now each of us will usually, and often, experience a person feeling that way about us. With the theme of OCD you have, the OCD tells tales, makes us feel responsive, in total opposite to our core values of steadfastness and faithfulness. We experience thoughts urges, maybe false memories, guilt. We get better only when we realise that it is all OCD - and that that's why we engage in carrying out compulsions, feel distressed. I am a sort of perpetual "it boy" - a socialite who thrives on the company of others. I bond easily with both sexes, equally comfortably. If I had your form of OCD, I think with the knowledge and experience I now have, I would cope - in the same way that many teachers with paedophile OCD have overcome it, and I with harm OCD do well now. It's not our mental ability - I have no especial mental strength - it's simply believing, and applying what we learn.