Lynz

Thanks all. I've reined it all in now. Just needed a bit of encouragement!

Hi all. I've jumped into the rabbit hole head first with this one but I'm trying really hard to resist the compulsion to ring my GP and ask for antibiotics. Other compulsions such as ruminating etc. are a lot harder to control and I think I need a bit of a kick up the bum! I've just bought this new espresso machine. It's very complicated and fancy and I'm still learning how to use it. I used it about a week ago (possibly longer but I'm not sure) and filled the water reservoir at the back up to the top and forgot to empty it after using it. I then used the machine again today, got the little instruction booklet out and made myself a nice cappuccino with it. However it was only after I made it did I realise that I didn't put fresh water in the reservoir at the back and it was made with the same water that I had put in it the last time it was used! The coffee itself tasted fine but obviously when I realised what I'd done I threw out the rest of it and emptied and cleaned the water reservoir and ran clean water through the machine as well. I'm so annoyed with myself. I tend not to worry about contamination and things like that but I'm really worried now about getting some kind of bacterial infection from drinking coffee made with old water. I did only have a little bit but I'm still worried. I do suspect that my risk awareness is overheightened with this because as a nurse we are constantly warned about legionella etc. and we have to run all of the taps and things like that on the ward every day to prevent it. I've never had my own coffee machine or anything similar before (I only used a kettle prior to this which is obviously boiled water each time it's used). I was just wondering if this is something that is actually serious or whether I have overinflated the risk at all.

Goodness me. I am a nurse working on the "front line" and the precautions you are taking are way more excessive than what we have to do. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. It sounds like you're taking all of the right steps with everything. I would definitely consider medication in your case as that could really help. It may seem like rock bottom at the moment but it's only onwards and upwards from here as you begin your recovery. Good luck 😊

I agree 100% with PB. I think you should start taking them again straightaway, but also contact your GP about the hair loss issue. They may be able to prescribe a different medication which doesn't cause this problem.

Thanks Gemma. Yes it was very challenging but we have rescheduled it for late September this year, so hopefully things will have quietened down by then. I'm just a bit upset as I managed to arrange literally everything for the day and now I've spent the last few days ringing suppliers/insurance providers etc. to cancel and rearrange it all. It just feels like a kick in the teeth really considering how difficult it was for me to get going with it all in the first place 😞.

Thanks BelAnna. I hope you and your family manage to stay safe and well in these challenging times too and that we'll all get through this together!

And finally, I've had to cancel my upcoming wedding and honeymoon in May due to this outbreak which I'm very upset about, so I think this upheaval is affecting my mood in general and exacerbating any anxiety symptoms that I may have already. Cancelling my wedding is a massive step back for me (albeit out of my control) because I previously had really bad OCD worries about this due to relationship-type worries. I'd done a lot of work in overcoming these over the past year and finally got to a stage where I could book the wedding and honeymoon without any anxiety and now I can't go ahead with it 😞. I'm trying really hard to not go down the OCD rabbit hole of "well it's obviously not meant to be then is it because it's been cancelled" etc.

Also I'm a nurse and I still have to go to work so I'm at an increased risk from that perspective as well.

I'm worried from a health anxiety perspective that if I catch the virus then I will become seriously ill and/or die. I'm 31 so I understand that I'm in a lower risk category due to age, but I do have mild asthma symptoms that have not yet been diagnosed as asthma or not, so with this current guidance that asthma sufferers are now at an increased risk of serious illness with coronavirus I'm worrying about that. I've also been unable to get an appointment with my GP for a spirometry test which will confirm a diagnosis of asthma as my GP surgery are now only accepting urgent appointments that have been triaged via telephone. I rang today to try and get an appointment and was told no even after explaining my situation. I'm upset because whilst I have not yet been diagnosed I therefore don't have any medication such as preventer or reliever inhalers, so if I did get coronavirus then I might be more ill because I don't have any medication to help with asthma symptoms if I did develop any.

You're welcome. Glad I could help

Hi Gemma, It is your choice of course but personally I would go for the hysterectomy as this will greatly reduce your physical symptoms of PMDD and endometriosis. Yes there is a chance your OCD may flare up but there is also a chance that it will improve. The way I see it is that presently you have both physical health issues caused by PMDD and endometriosis, as well as OCD on top of that. Having the hysterectomy will tackle the first two and then you will just be left with the OCD to tackle, and you will be in a much better place to try and tackle it without also having to deal with debilitating physical symptoms as well. Good luck with whatever you decide to do

Thanks everyone for your kind words A lot of my progress is down to you guys for always supporting and encouraging me to kick OCD into touch! I don't think I could have made the progress that I have done without all of your support so thank you

Just thought I'd post on here to update on how I'm doing as I feel I've made a lot of progress and wanted to share as it might give others a bit of hope. As some of you may know I've had OCD for a few years now and the themes have varied to focus on health issues, sexuality and gender identity worries, harm issues and more recently worries to do with my relationship. I've been engaged to my partner since 2011 but have put off getting married all this time due to overwhelming doubts that have appeared whenever I've tried to plan it, such as worrying whether I'm making the right choice or whether he is the "right" person for me, to questioning my own feelings and levels of attraction. Well I can now report that I've put in a lot of work in overcoming this and I've managed to buy a wedding dress, rings and various other bits and bobs and we have booked a date for 7th May 2020 and have paid the first big instalment towards it. I do still have horrendous doubts but overall I'm very happy about it. Hopefully I'll manage to carry on as I have been doing and not give into any compulsive urges. Hope everyone is doing well

Bobfish is right. Literally all of your posts are exactly the same, Lily. You come here panicking that you've touched someone or wanted to touch them for "sexual reasons", whether it be a friend, family member, professional person etc. You then repeatedly request reassurance that you're not a sexual deviant. We don't give you that reassurance and tell you that what you're experiencing is OCD, and that you need to stop carrying out your compulsions in order to get better. Then you disappear until a new thought enters your head and the cycle repeats again.

The Law of Attraction is nothing but a clever marketing concept designed to sell books and make money. It's absolute nonsense in my opinion. I'm all for the idea of having a positive mindset about life but that's about as far as it goes. Don't waste anymore time thinking about this, Ryukil, would be my advice.