Hal

Hi Charlie, Sorry, I’m much later replying than I intended, I will try to be on the forum more tomorrow...but how did you get on with your CC today, and how are you feeling in yourself?

How have you left it with the mental health nurse, what did they feel you should do? If an ambulance is called the crew will gently guide and help you leave the house, you won’t have to do it alone.

I remember you saying how bad it was last time you went in, but the thing is..maybe it’s the best place to help you and how you’re feeling. Hand on heart, can you keep yourself safe until your assessment tomorrow? If you’re not sure I think you need to seriously consider returning to hospital where they can help you until the thoughts subside. Something else I forgot to ask you, and I know this might sound a bit ‘out there,’ but have you eaten today? It’s the last thing I want to do when the anxiety’s high and I’m panicky, but if you’re not eating that in itself can worsen the anxiety. Even if it’s only a couple of biscuits or a couple of packets of crisps it may help a little to take some of the edge off the anxiety. Please take it steady....

I think if you’re not coping, maybe getting some more care and support at hospital might be the right thing to do today. As I said earlier tho, please try not worry about your CC...if she has got the wrong end of the stick the charity will be able to step-in and sort it out for you. All that’s important for now is keeping yourself safe, the staff at hospital will be able to help you do that until you’re feeling a bit better in yourself.

Hi Charlie, I know how terrible and painful these episodes with OCD are, and being scared they won’t pass, but they do...it’s important with how you’re feeling at the moment to remember that. If you really feel you may do something silly tho’ you must do the right thing to take care of yourself...by as Malina suggested earlier in the week getting in touch with the Samaritans. Or if you need immediate help you must make your way to your closest A&E, or give your GP and CC a call explaining absolutely honestly how badly you feel today and need immediate support, will you do that for me? You’re obviously in the grips of the OCD, but remember Polar Bear’s great summation that the disorder is always a liar. However real and scary the thoughts feel they are intrusive..if you didn’t suffer with OCD they’d pop up and also disappear just as quickly again. I know you’re also concerned you told your CC your fears...please try not to worry. If they’re not fully up to speed with the disorder I know the charity will step in and help resolve it for you, as it has for other people who’ve found themselves in the same situation. It’s important to bear in mind tho’ that when we’re really anxious we tend to automatically go to the worst case scenario, 9/10 everything works out fine. You’re obviously feeling overwhelmed with everything...try for the next couple of hours to look after yourself and work on getting the anxiety down...is there something you could do to help with that? Could you play some tracks, maybe a computer game, anything so long as it allows you to focus on it rather than the thoughts. Please take care of yourself, there is always support here for you at any time.

Go with what you want rather than what the disorder’s dictating, please try not to say anything. I know how difficult it is, but I can almost guarantee if you do...although it may not necessarily be this particular worry bothering you in six months, sure as anything with OCD it will be another issue around the same theme. Try to look at it this way, instead of accepting a morsel or scrap of less anxiety from carrying out the compulsion today...hold out and in the long run you’ll actually gain a feast by being rid of the OCD itself. That’s the ultimate goal for us all here... As you’ve said you need to start making changes today to turn things around...not confessing really is the best place to begin.

Hi Phil, Do you think it might perhaps be worth going back over some of the excellent advice you’ve been given here to help you decide how best to deal with this issue around your parent’s car door? I’m really worried when the doubt strikes you’ve fallen into the habit of immediately posting here...we need to try to help you break that loop, and begin building a bit more confidence in your own judgement with what to do, or not to do. That’s only going to come if you give yourself a fighting chance by putting into practice the tips and suggestions you’ve been given, and start relying a little less on the community for guidance. You can do this Phil, really you can...you have all the tools now...try when the next ‘what if’ strikes to pause and work through what you can do that will help you kick the disorder’s butt. To begin with the urge to ask the community’s opinion will be strong, but the more you can stick with it, the easier it will become. Could you set yourself a goal to give it a go for the next day or two and see how you get on?

Hi Charlie, Sorry for not getting back to you yesterday, I was strugggling with a sick headache I couldn’t shake-off, anyhoo... ......Can I ask how confident you feel about your care coordinator’s knowledge of OCD? I really think you do need better support than you’ve received so far, but if you’re unsure about your coordinator’s experience with the disorder perhaps you could raise again how much of a problem staring at people’s private areas has become for you..and that you need to see a CBT therapist, but for the time being perhaps don’t mention the staring at children. You and I both know the staring’s a compulsion and you’re doing it because you have OCD, but even within mental health services there can still sometimes be a lack of knowledge about the disorder when it comes to intrusive thoughts involving children. I have a feeling I may have muddied the waters a bit by saying that, but it’s important you get to speak to the right professional about this, and then you can raise this specific compulsion.

I understand the replies Charlie’s received here are being made with the best of intentions and with his interests at heart, but I’ve set those where people are putting 2 + 2 together and coming up with 5, and clouding the issue a little...that Charlie needs support/advice for, as invisible. I agree with Polar tho,’ Charlie... I think you really need CBT. I know in the past you’ve had problems with your team accessing it, but could you ask your GP to support your request, or could the charity maybe help you with some advocacy?

For the life of me I can’t see why this warrants a professional opinion....it’s seems to be just a case of mistaken identity to me, that as you’ve identified Angst the is OCD trying to get its hooks into with the idea to check CCTV etc. I think I would just say Hi, quickly say you have a doppelgänger, haven’t met the individual and leave it there. This isn’t psychosis imo, just regular OCD starting to latch onto a rare situation, that I think you could nip in the bud Angst.

Hi Dean, Welcome I’d personally be very wary going down this route. When the anxiety’s high I know it’s tempting to want to try anything to be shot of it... but aside from the legal side of things, there are risks attached to what you’re considering, even with a sitter. From what I gather can’t it sometimes increase anxiety and panic attacks? Have you been able to get any help so far with more conventional therapy in the form of CBT or tried any prescribed medication recommended for treating OCD? I know I’ve come across as pretty negative, but sometimes what we hope will help can make things worse, please take it steady and really think this through.

I reckon you’re spot on, and having that insight to see this is OCD up to its usual sneaky tricks shows just how well you’re doing to see this for what it is. Try tho’ not to use how anxious you feel to gauge how well you’re doing...feeling less anxiety one day and more the next isn’t a sign you’re losing ground in your recovery, it’s how well we can resist carrying out the compulsions that are a sign of progress, and even there we’ll have good and bad days. With this specific situation and your colleague, could you adopt a flexible attitude? The best response from an OCD treatment perspective will be to throw caution to the wind and see where the conversation leads...if she says something you’re unhappy about you can try to not avoid it or steer the conversation onto something else and then get back on with work things. That’s when the urge to analyse, replay and question if it was the right way of handling it from your therapist’s point of view is going to strike, but you have the OCD’s number on this...try waving the thoughts aside, some imagery may even also help by imagining the conversation tied to balloons floating and disappearing into the sky and try to stay focused on the task in hand. The key is flexibility and trying new ways out to handle this. See how you go, but don’t beat yourself up if you do find yourself going over what was said...it takes time and loads of practice.

Hi angels, You certainly don’t have to stay on medication for life, people do... but it’s a really personal decision whether or not to come off them after weighing up all the pros and cons and what’s right for you and where you feel you are on your road to recovery. Seven weeks of continued improvement is a great achievement and if they’re helping you at 40mg...I would probably be tempted to maintain that dose for a little while longer while you continue with therapy. Maybe in a couple of months you can reassess and have a chat with your doctor about gradually reducing them again? The thing to also bear in mind with medication is it won’t take away the OCD itself and remove the intrusive thoughts and doubts...all the work and effort you’re putting into therapy are where the real inroads in overcoming the disorder are going to be made. If, and it sounds like they are, the medication’s helping you with that work I’m not sure I would rock the boat just for the minute until you feel a bit more confident about your progress. I should add I guess, I’m just a fellow sufferer, it might be worth gauging your therapists thoughts too about this, and go from there?

Unfortunately the Bath based Centre for Specialist Psychological Treatments of Anxiety and Related Problems closed last year I think....other options/therapists/centres are still out there to help you tho’ battle. Is it something you’d consider or maybe like the charity to help you out with?