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  1. I really need to get rid of this, go back to normal life. Today I was cycling home and I got paranoid about if someone had thrown something at me because I feelt wet in my face, I mean form a car and then I analyzed spots on my clothes when I came home. It's a bad situation. Whatever. I know the drill guys and I am thankful for all your answers. Now I won't bother you any longer. Thanks once again! I did get contacted by the organization, now I just need to break free from my social phobia.
  2. I am not feeling panik any more but I suddenly became intrestingly depressed. The sick and twisted event have put me in a place of sadness. Yesterday I sat and thoguth about my grandmothers place and I have planned a trip to the place just to feel nostalgia. I can't stop thinking about how twisted people are, predators.
  3. Hello there. Well, what can I say? I feel bad about it but now I have been reading about crimes in general and it feels better. It's a sick world. But yea, if I recall that line I become angry. But who knows if I also have GAD beside OCD, because you know, I am always having something nagging and it's not that I am doing compulsions, more like catastrophizing, always something, something that could be better. The weekend was hell. It did make me contact an organisation because I want to get involved with others with OCD, help people, because I know that feeling of panic, if it so is a call with someone or anything I would like to help them. Can you make sense of this?
  4. Hi and thank you for all your support. I have been a mess since it happened. Today the plan is to train and most of all not going for the medication, my doctor said I should take it when I feelt like I coulnd't cope and I couldn't! I was having a panicattack and feelt as bad as I can imagine. My fear have turned real. The plan is trying to keep going. I do understand when you are telling me to stop recording and such but it is sadly getting more unsafe in general both in my direct vicinity and the country. What can I say, that I haven't already said? Thanks
  5. Hello. I do know somewhere that I could do that. It just feels so bad. I hate the whole situation. All I can hear in my head is that line. And I can't keep regretting that I didn't manage to install one at the front. It would do absolut perfect in this situation. Maybe even the police would care with videofootage. I feel really really low, I even have been taking the emergencymedication I haven't touched for a long time. There will be no answer to this, only regret and anger towards the sick people doing stuff like this. I guess it was better that I found out yesterday because if I already had touched the doorhandle before finding out I don't know what I would do. I don't know now either, I have already started to question if I did touch the outside.
  6. Hi I am sorry I am posting again. I just want to say that I have got the diagnosis OCD before and it has been about dirt and contaminations. I have honestly been better for a long time. I got 3.5 hours sleep, I feel absolute ****, it feels like my life could be over. Listen to the recording again and it seems like there was people going pass my house the whole evening, cars and stuff but then it got an abrupt end with this incident. The guy is asking the others if he shall do it and then the other guy says "go quick". I guess that was before it knocked, who knows what the creep did before he knocked. I should have bought another camera! One at the door, what use do I have of a camera to the garden?! What use do I have with this knowledge, I would rather not know what the creeps said. I can't tell anyone neither, it's so twisted. But I will contact the police, sadly they aren't taking me serious because me and a friend went to the policstation under an argument as young adults.
  7. Hello. What a night, from relative calm to full panic because of some idiots. I am mad as... But most of all I do fear things and I feel so afraid of this, what will happen with me... Is this it? I live with my parents and last night at 11.30 PM did some youngsters knock at the door loudly, just to disturb. I am sure they find it funny, sick people. But here comes the really sick twist and this is the thing which gave me full panic. So hard panic I had to take my medication which I haven't touched in a long time. I also need to work and I haven't sleept in 20 hours. The sick twist is this: 3 weeks ago I installed a camera over the garden, it just covers the garden and you can't see outsid the door BUT you can hear because it has a microphone and I heard some sickening stuff! First I heard 1 or 2 girls giggling then I hear a guy saying a word (xxxx) which means touching your penis on the doorhandle, he asked if he should ****. Another guy says "fast" and then there is nothing more of the tape. I have listened. In fact listening to this sick recording is the reason I got panic, I was laying in my bed and was just going to try to get some sleep and I heard this word and BOOM. I went outsid and washed all the doorhandles there is, I am pretty sure I never touched any of them on the outsid because I normally don't and especially not when someone have knocked in the middle of the night. Put on gloves and washed them and then hosed them down with water. I remember getting some waterdrops in my face from this. 1. I can't stop blaming myself from not having bought a camera to use outsid the door 2. Why, how, what if, what now? Please help me....
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