Getmeout

A muffled left ear. feels ****

Really really bad. Nobody wants me, I feel utterly useless because well I am in the eyes of the market. Also, I won't get any chance to pay any rent without job..

I would say that my lie sucks but I am also getting a lot of things done which I didn't before. But yes stressed to say the least.

I am . My life is sucking really hard. But My hearing is muffled for real right now. So is this OCD too?

Seriously I have been outside for like 2 years (always wearing headphones) and there have never been any incidents beside one or two motorbikes driving past me. I take them off and this happens INSTANTLY.. I value my hearing much more.

I go out without (dampening) headphones for the first time in like 2 years time because I left them to charge and thought let's try to go without them and you know what happens!!?!? When I stand in the affair and I only mind my own business a high sounding alarm goes off. One of the lazy staff didn't remember to turn it off before he opened the door. Oooh god I can't hear now and I feel it in my ears. BLOODY HELL you guys (and others) always say don't be afraid and then I do this stuff and I get punished right away. I stood like 2 metres away from it and this is the incidents I try to make less severe when I go around with headphones on. Well actually I am trying to dampen the damages from high sounds like motorbikes, fire crackers and even bombs, bombs are getting more and more common in this country. Feed up. I don't think I am going to listen to more of this "expose yourself". My hearing is more valuable than exposing.

Facebooks and its trolls, even invades groups when the people are having these isssues, like OCD. I mean trolls wants a reaction and are sadists according to science so OCD-sufferers are the best to troll. You get a reaction right. There was a troll who said I should find the animal and get it help. How I even could do that, it ran away and calling the police on something like these things only makes you blacklisted. I once called a animal shelter when I found a hurt bird at the side of the road but they couldn't even come then, said they didn't care about smaller animals.

I found a name and contacted him on Facebook.

It was a farmer I never knocked on the door because I thought I could message on Facebook. IT was getting dark but I can't find any persons on that adress. oh goood.

I was out biking and it was getting dark. The grass was high on the spot it happened. From nowhere something jumps up on the road .50 cm from my bike tire and I drive over it. I stop and go back NOthing on the road but there was a road to this farmer's house and there it was, jumping back . IT will most cerrtainly die a painful death and I really tried to be logical and I will contact the farmer now. I think it was a wild rabbit but who knows. IT COULD ALSO be something totally else, like a cat but yeah. SOOO is the idea that I will not think about this killer incident now? Because all I can remembe is the cute rabbit jumping back..

This will maybe look like a try to get reassurance but I can't ask anyone else about this topic. I just know how I would feel. I would feel destroyed honestly. If we changed positions him and me,

I should be happy and content after a week of stress, I was on a course on truck driving and it went good but this incident has destroyed my joy. We were instructed and I was nervous and a guy walke to the left of me. I had no idea. So I stretched my arm backwards because I was nervous. I touched something, don't ask me what. To make it obvious it was a mistake I looked confused and begged for forgivness. But I know what I would think.... I would have been destroyed! I feel like a predator. I even think it could classify as rape in my country. He was the same length as me and yeah pretty sure I touched something in that area. Help.

I was on a semi public toilet today. ANd I never use the papers at the toilet, mostly never where you wash your hands neither. But today I had to be there for 1 hour so when I came out from the toilet I told the guy in the reception that there were no more paper. He went in there and took some to me and it would be awkward not to use it. I don't know if he took some of the rolls under the "washer" or from the paper beside the toilet. I am feeling pretty strange now. I would never do it myself. ///// I had to be there for 1 hour and concentrate on what was said so I didn't have time to think about it but now when I am home again I have all the time in the world.

I am an misanthrope and I doesn't feel bad about it. This incident however.

I don't think he needed to. He looked angry at life. I thought it was a low risk of it being anything else than the rain when I passed through him but then I started to think about it. I don't know how to handle this.