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BRG

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  1. Hi taurean, Would you recommend camamile or these Pukka Berry sleep, or the twinings camamile and honey? Sorry its not the main discussion, but would like to know what's good for sleep and whats not, drink wise in teas etc. Thanks
  2. I use the following app... (I have no affilate or advantage from texting these) it just helps me. https://pzizz.com/ combined with the following ear phones, which are small that I can ly on my side in bed. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0BXPCSXGK?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details I was a bit concerned that they are made in China - with all publicity about lithium batteries etc, but so far so good for me - touch wood!
  3. Brilliant. Also, to put it in perspective, there's a notice up in the local hospital which says 'a mobile phone is more dirtier or uncleaner than a toilet seat?' Food for thought. But don't get a thing about a phone now! I think the point is, there are so many different things out there that contains different bacteria, that there's absolutely no point in worrying about any of it. :)
  4. Nope. Not crazy at all And yes, the mind is a wonderful thing, and at times frustrating to OCD suffers - myself included Yes, try and be strong, brave and couragous (OCD people are some of the strongest willed people I know) and stick at it - we'll get there.
  5. Do a test, and know this. Tonight or tomorrow, say I love you once, and once only. But maybe just before you say it, in your mind, say to yourself, I'm going to say this once and I'm going to mean it, because I do mean it. After you come away, your mind (or compulsion) is going to say to you 'did I mean that?', 'should I go back in, wake her up and say it again?'... Dont! Let it ride, accept that its going to feel odd, but go with it. Its difficult, but say to yourself, I'll live with the 'wanting to go and make it right for 1 hour'. After that 1 hour, if you still feel the same compulsion, go and do it, but try again tomorrow. My guess (going off mine) is that you will leave it after the hour.
  6. I know what you mean. I have the thing where if I say something slightly wrong or mispronouce a word - I have to say the word again out loud, even if the other person understood my wrong version. Its that little voice in your head which says, 'just say that out loud again, just in case, and everything will be okay'. Its crackers, you know you're doing it, but you still have to do it! The only thing I can pass on is this. You sound as though you're in a rush for your OCD to go away and that's whats frustrating you. Take it from me, its a long term or to be more precise 'whatever term' it needs to be. But don't let it become even more of a thing for you. For a start, there is always someone worse off than yourself, so if you can appreciate how lucky you are - that's a bit of positivity there. Also, I believe you have to have courage. The courage part is in doing what they call ERP, Exposure and Response Prevention. Basically, its giving yourself little tasks to do, in not doing what you would normally do that your OCD is telling you to do - the compulsion. So your task would be to say not say 1, 2, or 3 instances of your OCD per day - its a game! So tomorrow, purposely do two occassions where you do not repeat the same thing. Just two (or just one?) for that day. Do the same tomorrow. Then when you're comfortable with that. Do 3 or 4 for the day where you do not repeat words. Eventually - so it goes - you get used to not repeating at all. Don't worry if you fail on any day or days, just don't give up, remember, you're not giving your OCD any power to hurt or frustrate you anymore. No time on this thing. But the main thing is accept these things, dont get wound up, don't give up, say to yourself, 'well if I've got this thing, i'm going to get on with my life - its not going to disrupt anything else' I've had tinitus for over 15 years now - 24/7 a high-pitched whistle in my ear - I will never hear silence again the rest of my life. What do I do? Let it get me down, or carry on, enjoy life as much as possible? And what's more, some pop stars even have my condition - Chris Martin, Phil Collins, Grimes, Blondie - how cool am I !!
  7. Hi, OCD feeds on guilt. That's its main job to latch onto any feeling where you think you may of done something wrong or feel guility about. I would say you have nothing to feel guilty about. As social human beings, I believe we all long comfort, good feelings and its nice talking to someone of the opposite sex or same sex - especially on a night out, and alcohol relaxes our social constrictions. Resassurance is no good. Long term you should look at it like this: Do you think your other half would feel guilty chatting to another girl on a night out. When your partner has done something wrong and you tell him off - then you think you did something similar and that makes you think, then you become guilty again because you had a similar thing... the cycle goes on. Its something we have to live with and move on. That was then. Today is a new day, so continue as a new day and stop looking back and feeding the guilt. Move on with the day. Don't be concerned with something that has now happened a year ago. Its up to you whether you let it happen again, but if you decide that you don't want it to happen again, then forget about it and continue with no OCD feedings of guilt. Learning and patience. That would be my advice.
  8. Hi, yes, I use toilet paper to lift seat. Also, if you're worried about toilets or needing one if you think you're going to over-drink, then think about where all the public toilets are in Malls, or shopping centres, super stores etc, cafe's etc. Also, this guy helped https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV-qT2L4Lk8 Regards
  9. Well one of mine is about knives. Everytime I see a sharp knife in the kitchen, I instantly think I'm going to use that knife to kill someone close by or do harm, and sometimes even on my own, the thoughts come into my mind for the past 30 odd years, and it did un-nerve me too much. After all my research, I now think about not worrying about the thoughts, it'll probabily be there all my life, but now I'm going to be not bothered that much (it'll always bother me to some or little effect). The're just thoughts - thoughts are not harmful whatever they are - only actions are, not thoughts. I'm not going to fear the thoughts now, but I also realise that maybe somedays I won't think these thoughts at all, and sometimes I will think them - but I'm going to get on with my day, they are not going to hold any value, I'm determined about that - or, at the very least, as little as possiible fear, which is fine by me. And yes, you sound a decent person (as I hold myself in the same way) but that's exactly why the ocd chooses these things - to upset us, because as decent people its trying to give us thoughts which make us uncomfortable.
  10. I'm definately... most definately, NOT an expert. But from all the online therapists and knowledge I've been trying to learn and accumulate for ocd whether it be pocd or harm ocd (or other themes) to yourself or others, apparently they say, that you have to agree with harm ocd etc. Example: 'I'm going to harm one of those kids or injure.' Then you have to tell your brain - "Yep, thats right, my fear is right that I may harm one of them." My opinion is obviously that if you do have a record of previously harming kids etc, then i would have thought this would not be the correct thing to say in your mind. But again (my opinion) if you have not harmed kids, but you are worried that you might - but you don't really want to or its not in your personality - then I believe they call it facing up to your fears, whereby you agree with your fears, to take the power away from them. Maybe someone with more experience on your particualar subject can give more guidance, on here? I would have thought that once you get your head sorted and your thinking, then yes, you will be comfortable around children again. Its just your brain giving you intrusive thoughts which you find worrying. Once you don't care about these intrusive thoughts thats when you won't care about being around children, because it will be meaningless in your mind, and you get on with life or in doing something else that day?
  11. Apparently, and this is difficult to believe, the trick is to trick your brain into saying 'yes, I'm loving those kids and the noise they make'. You obviously will need to 'act' this. But you're trying to trick your brain into not giving this noise any power to wind you up. Takes time, difficult, but to do with CBT theropy. Just say to yourself, 'I'll get used to it, and it won't wind me up anymore'. I think its something like when you go to a party, and with all the raised voices in the room, your brain can ignore all the other conversations and just filter out one conversation from across the room that you brain wants to listen in on.
  12. Maybe this will help also? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNxlpotyLRs
  13. Hi, this works for me, if any help? What I did before, is in the past - its not the me now, in the present. As humans, I believe we are all learning every day of our lives. That was us, then, in the past. Its not us now. Before the ocd, past events would be fleeting thoughts - something to think, acknowledge and then forget about, and we could - and that's how we should continue and live our lives - the past is the past, in the past where it belongs and we continue to live. With ocd it magnifies any guilt that we would have let go of, regarding any past event. But with ocd, it holds on to that real event from the past and makes us feel guilt in the present, wanting to confess to someone, so that we can have some sort of release and to have a breather from something that is upsetting us. So personally, I continue. My past is the past, I'm going to move on. We get one life, so I'm going to learn from the past and try to enjoy the present, and hope for the future. Like me, don't give yourself a hard time, its not your cross to bear, you can move on, like me. It will never leave you, but you can accept it and move on with your life... its an old pal which wants to say hello from time to time, so you can now say 'hi' and so long, if ever we meet in the future, I'm still going to move on and see what else life brings me. I know it sounds like I'm giving you all this positivity lecture, but it does help me. On a serious note, but i guess it's relevant? Remember that guy who played Dirty Den in Eastenders, well he was actually in prison for murder in his past I believe. Now I guess this is the ultimate, but he carried on, and became a famous actor in the UK. Weird going from taking a life, to becoming a celebrity, but there you go. He would of walked with that knowledge, but he got on with life and made a success. Personally never liked him - but that's just me! But the example is there. Past event = move on and live life. That's all we can do, and who knows, if you can help people and be okay with your life, maybe we can make up for anything we feel guilty about in the past, by living in the present and being a better person for the future. Matthew 12:1 Chapter 1 - only kidding there - please don't anyone take a poke at me for religious thing there, just trying to lighten the mood for me going on a bit? Much regards.
  14. Another idea jm: You've more or less done a list of your things. Put them all in order from the most horrible to you, down to the least horrible. Then for either 1 day or 1 week don't do the thing which is upsetting you - starting from the bottom of the list (the least upsetting). Its not a race here, so you allow yourself time, 1 day, 1 week etc or concentrate on ignoring that thing which upsets you (from the bottom of the list). Can you imaging how you would feel if you just sorted out one of them. The happiness that would bring you however small - then you have a tool to help with the rest of them. And you go on like this, one after the other. I found that once I conquered one, another one reared its head, but I know how to do it now. Take a breather. if you conquer one and another one appears - that's fine. If you conquer one and no other one appears, then that's fine also, you go onto the next one. Look at them as a challenge, a game, and your test, or puzzle, is to work on them, giving them no more power any more, because you've had enough. From now on, you're facing up to the things that wind you up, that frustrate you, that compell you. Of course, once you successfully do one, you'll probably come back to it over time, but it will be less frightening and frustrating, and you know how to play the game now. You will be fine. You're going to see the light at the end of the tunnel, because you're doing something about it, and not being a passive victim anymore - you're going to participate in facing up to things. You can do it. I'm doing it every day. I may be like this for a year or couple of years, or the rest of my life, but I'm not going to stand back - I'm going to do something about it. In short jm, the idea is to not give them any power over you (this is a learning thing by the way, its not an instant thing). Things may or may not happen if you start facing your fears, about not doing these things, but what have you got to lose by not doing some of these things. Look at it as a test if you stop some of them and see what happens - have courage, like me, to try - courage. You're not alone - always remember that. Here we can chat, get things off our chest, not alone. One of mine, was standing over a towel on a radiator for 20 minutes or whatever, kept picking it up and putting it down, until it looked right. Couldn't stop, even before bed, I stood there and almost cried because it wouldn't let me go. I got over that one by waiting until day time, and then I picked up the towel and threw it anyway against the radiator. It really felt good to do that and not worry. I tried it again... this was great. Just kept throwing it and didn't care. Got bored of doing that and thought, I'll throw it one last time (after 5 mins) and got on with my day - couldn't give a toss then. Now, I still think about it, done the odd (and I mean the odd) make it right on the radiator, but nothing to speak of. Don't care about it now. Just try one of yours and try to not care about it, start small maybe or something that has the least effect or hold.
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