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Everything posted by Ashley

  1. But as you know, this need not be a permanent state. So life may seem grim today, but none of us know what tomorrow or next week or next year holds.
  2. Well done Billy, that is one of the hardest things to do in my opinion, the initial opening up. I think with the gP you don't need to say too much, just tell them you have OCD and need help (through CBT) for it. But when you start talking with a therapist you may be able to gauge by the way they talk about OCD and the questions they ask if they truly understand it. If they do, then that should facilitate you being able to talk openly, and hopefully that will lead to the therapist understanding your problems to be able to help you. If you are unsure perhaps you can start by talking about other aspects of your OCD that you have and you feel are safe to talk about, and mention you have unwanted intrusive thoughts to gauge their reaction. When people tell me that on the helpline I try and help them out by showing I understand by asking if it's a violent or sexual nature and other questions, depending how they answer. Every time I have done this, I can sense the relief in the person knowing I understand it. If you really are not feeling with with the therapist you can perhaps go back to the GP and ask them if they refer you to another therapist and try again. Sometimes people say they want to speak to a male/female instead because they feel more comfortable with that sex. Not ideal to switch therapists, but sometimes works. Let us know how you get on Ashley.
  3. Hi Annie, I do understand why you are feeling uncertain with this, but I am guessing by the fact you have asked the question you are partly thinking this is your OCD talking, is that right? What are your thoughts? Ashley
  4. Her opinion is fine, not one I agree with, but her opinion, the mental illness part is wrong though which I will come to in a moment. Not sure I agree with you Lynz, whilst I am not a royalist, I don't accept that those that are and showing respect to someone should be considered embarrassing? Happy to debate that point on a non OCD part of the forum. But back to your question Felix, the 'mental illness' part really is concerning and not really the correct action of a professional working in mental health, so I might be tempted to raise it with their professional body conduct and leave to them to decide if they have broken any rules. Some of the BPS psychologists comments you see on Twitter are questionable on various subjects, especially when it comes to diagnostic labels it's become embarrassing to see professionals argue so publicly and some totally disregard service user groups opinions, especially over the use of the label OCD which the majority find helpful. But ultimately are their opinions so not much an ethics body could look at there I suspect. It would make me not want to see them though.
  5. Yes, I reported on it in the magazine.
  6. The only people really bigging this up as a treatment for OCD are the TMS companies themselves. In all the articles and stories you read about TMS it's the same one or two gentleman being interviewed as it helping. I am not sure it's widely suggested as a treatment, other then the TMS companies. It's important to be open to new research, but I personally would not recommend it based off the research pieces I have seen so far. Maybe others may comment differently.
  7. The problem is that OCD will latch onto 'what if it was illegal', rather than it was illegal and I must report it. So such links, although well-meaning, are unhelpful in this situation. I am not really clear what advice you are looking for. Ultimately it's the OCD that is causing the problem as you mention, so if you have had treatment for OCD try and treat it like any other obsession using the CBT techniques, the therapy principle remains the same to try and identify what the fear would mean to you and why it bothers you so much, and then look to challenge it by, well carrying on! Not something I thought I would ever write in my OCD forum! Morally, some people would suggest that is a fair comment/advice. OCD wise it would be avoidance I guess
  8. Sorry just seen your post and shooting off out in a moment, but I wanted to reply and say I will try and come back to you in the week with some links to presentations that could be helpful and any other advice I can offer. But on the quoted point, I hear this a lot with adults too sometimes and the first thing I always think of is has the person ever heard or spoken to someone with OCD who is making progress, even if not better yet, to see that things can improve and people do improve can be so helpful in changing such mindsets
  9. If your are unsure if something is OCD or not, then the golden rule is to assume it is OCD and try not to engage in what OCD is wanting. Easier said than done I know. By taking this approach does not mean it will automatically reinforce OCD at all, and is actually an attempt to stand up tot he OCD. Of course it wont always work, but like many others I have found the approach helpful to recogonise actually that is an OCD thought/behaviour.
  10. You are right, the family are thew forgotten sufferers sometimes. Of course it does vary from family to family, but there would certainly be benefits if the close family members are involved in therapy sometimes (learning what to do and what not to do). However, often this can't happen without the adult giving permission due to confidentiality issues. The NHS does involve parents of children a little more, and we offer workshops for parents of children (CAMHS age) too which was lottery funded, but sadly due to expire soon. We are trying to get a presentation together for family members for our online annual conference and we have alos hosted a couple of support groups for family members recently too. None of that is enough, but a start If you feel that your mental health is suffering then in theory you can request counselling/therapy through your local mental health service (IAPT). They won't be able to talk about your son, but can talk about how you are feeling. I can always look up your local therapy service should you want me to. We are actually redesigning our call to action on the NHS and we will include action for families too. Ashley.
  11. I am sure it was perhaps well-meaning, but I am not sure offering somebody with OCD and where the relationship is entangled with OCD the link to a random you tuber offering relationship advice is helpful so I have removed the suggestion.
  12. Well done on this progress Paul, that's amazing and sorry the news as stalled you. If you can, ignore the news and focus on your amazing progress and see if you can go even further with it if you feel you want to. What I mean... I don't know if this helps you or not, but I have had an issue this year in the charity office where I realised I was checking the door lock multiple times, walking away then going back to check. I then found if I tried to check once, I would check multiple times. But actually, locking the door and walking away weirdly gave me less anxiety than just checking the door once. So now I turn the key and walk away 9/10 times. Get the odd blip, but mainly all good. Anyway, checking once is still great and I hope this news doesn't get in the way of your continued success
  13. In your case, but a compulsion is a compulsion and checking a lock or a smart lock just once is a compulsion and OCD. As Polarbear says, some people will be inclined to check their smart lock on their phone. So getting a smart lock because you're a tech geek (like me) is fine. Getting it because of OCD is a compulsion and more likely to make the problem worse, not better.
  14. Hello, Sorry I did not see this before. Due to the workshops delegate participation we can not record them, however I believe Zoe will be shortly launching a new series of online parents webinars for those unable to attend. These wont be recorded, but will be online webinars, free to access (until December) that people can attend from anywhere in the UK.# Ashley
  15. 'on average', but children can be diagnosed aged 5 or 6 and symptoms can show even younger. but Handy is partly right in that sometimes symptoms in children can come and go and never be seen again. But if in doubt always consult a health professional through the GP and CAMHS, but sadly as many on here will testify, there are long waits. OCD will generally be diagnosed if the person, your son is experiencing anxiety/stress/fears/worries when doing these behaviours. Behaviours themselves would not dictate OCD. Sometimes there will be a known reason why they feel they must do these behaviours, but other times there is no reason, the child will have more of a 'feeling' they must do something and get anxious if they can't. Lets stick to letting the experts make suggestions please Handy as if this is OCD then it would need age appropriate psychological therapy, not art therapy and play. I'm not sure what you mean by this Handy, but the evidence is clear, OCD is best treated by psychological therapy, CBT - a form of talking (and some doing) therapy. Some people benefit from medication alongside CBT, but for children then ideally therapy first without meds. and leave medication unless needed.
  16. Hiya, I haven't, but there is a strong chance I have both, the ADHD part undiagnosed. A member of our team have recently had an ADHD diagnosis after many years so this is an area of interest for us all and we are trying to find a speaker to talk about this at our November conference with a view to answering many of the questions you raise. In the meantime I will ask the person in question to take a read of your post and see if they can answer, which if they do I will post their replies. With best wishes, Ashley
  17. I would personally sack this psychologist immediately, as they clearly do not understand OCD or how to do their own job! If they are NHS put a complaint in (to help them get better training to improve their skills and help other patients). There are many types of OCD, some of which it is impossible to do actual exposure exercises with, but there is so many creative ways good therapists work with patients to help them overcome their OCD, and people really do overcome OCD, regardless of type
  18. Who hasn't But I think this is the significant part, you say to you they are bad, but actually I think it's OCD that's telling you that, so your first inclination that they may not seem too bad is the reality of the situation, and as I say, who hasn't done something they regret. The thing is, if you do that, OCD will still be there on the same subjects and maybe on new subjects too. So I understand why you might think that is the best option, but it really isn't an option. In this situation, try not to beat yourself up about the things you're meant to do (you mentioned a few), and go back to basics, pick up ine of the better self-help books, read through, refresh your memory on how OCD works and basics things to do. David Veale's new OCD book (overcoming) well worth a read. Stay strong
  19. Thank you for posting auroramaple, I know you are trying to help I was tempted to remove the link to this video because it's a commercial account, but I think it may be better served if I just post a heads up then people can make their own informed choice. So just my standard message about this guy for anyone tempted to part with money. He is not a therapist, and to the best of my knowledge does not have any medical qualifications. More than that there were a few users on the forum who told the forum how they paid sums of money and were given just a few minutes and minimal insightful help. He sucks people in with his social media, but actually it's mainly waffle and no real substance the majority of the time in my opinion. Some of the wonderful posters on this forum offer better advice in their posts than much of this guys social media content in my opinion. I believe one of his social media accounts was deleted by the social media company recently too.
  20. Very hot.. I sent the staff home at midday, well they were all home, but I told them to stop working and stay cool.

  21. Thanks all. I would be happy to tr yand help you Gingerplum. However you want us to, you could draft a letter and I am happy to help you with it, or if you want to express to me what you want to say I can draft the letter for you and then you can either send in your name or we can send on your behalf (without using your name if preferred). Sadly in my experience this will go one of two ways, either the person will claim they have OCD and want to put it to good use, or they will simply dismiss us. It's rare for a company to change their branding when they have spent so much on it. That's not to say we should not still try to influence them and write a polite letter encouraging them to reconsider their company name. Ashley
  22. Handy, once again you are posting something that is, at best, unhelpful nonsense. In terms of OCD, regardless if someone is 21 or 29 if OCD becomes locked in place, that brain lock we often talk about, then OCD is stuck, and the age is irrelevant.
  23. How does this relate to the helpful therapeutic ideas/points JJMm was making?
  24. This is not unusual and try not to worry. 'Labels' are a little bit like OCD thoughts in some respects, that it's what we do with them that defines how relevant they are. So for example I wonder if you knowing if certain thoughts are OCD and might have been mislabelled,s you want to know if it is OCD is reassurance? If so, then perhaps the label is not so helpful. So maybe, try and live with the uncertainty and assume it is OCD. I know that's hard. Focus on what you know, that you have OCD, you mention the diagnosis, so assume this is OCD. The golden rule of thumb is that if you think something might be OCD, then it probably is. Professor Salkovskis often posts a picture of a duck to illustrate this... if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck,quacks like a duck then it's probably a duck. Of course Paul is is much funnier when he says it! So... what is it?
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