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mummyoftwogirls

Bulletin Board User
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About mummyoftwogirls

  • Birthday 07/07/1986

Previous Fields

  • OCD Status
    Sufferer
  • Type of OCD
    OCD!

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    london

Recent Profile Visitors

2,226 profile views
  1. I’m really at a stuck point in my recovery . sometimes I’ll get a thought ( same theme ) and it’s feels real but easy to dismiss as not real. The thing is there are a few thoughts/feelings that are harder to let go of as my feels like it likes it and it’s harder to let go. Its really hindering my recovery because everytime I get an awful ocd thought and I can dismiss it as ocd it takes me back to the one or two that feel more real . So it’s now become about the easiness of dismissing a thought and comparing how I can dismiss one and know it’s ocd but it the other . I’ve had ocd for over 25 years various themes and even was in remission for 3 years before perimenopause set in . im currently in therapy and also take 30mg Prozac . This has allowed me to function and almost removed the anxiety ( which scares me) but the obsessions are still lingering without the physiological anxiety . has anyone experienced this where you compare the realness of thoughts . I think I’ve lost a lot of insight as I feel a bit numb to the subject now and kinda dissociated.
  2. Hi I just wanted to let you know I’m going through exactly the same . Even the moral thought you had when checking . I don’t know what to believe anymore , I don’t know who I am . Ocd for 25 years and this theme has been the worse .
  3. My partner of 16 months knows I have ocd . When we got together I thought I had recovered as i worked hard on it and hadn't had it for over 2 years . I told him at the beginning I had recovered and 3 months into the relationship my ocd returned which I told him. He has no idea that my ocd is about him ( it's not a nice one at all) I havent told him because of 2 reasons 1 telling him I think would be a compulsion and a gateway for reassurance and 2 if he knew the theme he would almost certainly leave me because how horrifically it centres on himself. And would most certainly hurt his feelings. My question is a hard one because I feel I am not being 100 percent honest in our relationship by keeping this from him . I feel like I'm holding back vulnerability and also not giving the chance of seeing the real me and actually knowing what he is getting himself into. He doesnt know I struggle with ocd everyday he thinks I have a very handle on it. What is the right thing to do ?
  4. It triggers off my ocd but like you said because of the serotonin deopninqoild imagine:-)
  5. Oh dont! Had a few good months . Got totally wan***** Saturday night and my ocd is awful now
  6. Hi ! No I'm not . I've had ocd of and on for 22 years . Seen many cbt therapists accredited claim to know how to treat ocd but always endeded up reassuring me in some way or not really fully understanding ocd and they was the private ones! Dont even get me started on the nhs ones . Most of the therapists the nhs have sent me thought ocs was about cleaning. I did have one private one I paid £90 an hour for , he was good but had moved away , that was over 5 years ago. I had actually thought i recovered I've had no symptoms for nearly 3 years but covid started it all up again. I know the only way to get treatment quick will be with a well recommended therapist like ash has mentioned but jesus christ £200+ an hour is too much for a single mum! Hope you are doing well with treatment, that's a good rate £60 . sending hugs
  7. Thanks ashley , I would love to have therapy with the names you mentioned but david is advertising 0ver 200 pound for 45mins. I can't afford this unfortunately. I have emailed a few of your other recommendations and I'm hoping they will be a little cheaper. My budget would be up to £110 and hour
  8. Great advice , thank you so much . I didnt realise she wasn't accredited and that statement so also a red flag to me. Thanks Ashley
  9. Has anyone had therapy with Ali greymond ? Would you recommend?
  10. Thank you so much for your balanced and lovely reply. I really appreciate you taking the time to reply. You are totally right , this is a mixture of everything coming together. And ocd exasperating it. I have lots to improve on but I suppose all in good time. Thank you again x
  11. That should say I dont think I'm special or above anyone ?
  12. I have had ocd since the age if 12 but not sure if this is ocd related . In the last few years now age 33 I seem to have become more self aware , and there are some things I dont like about myself. I think I'm probably quite a selfish person, my ocd has consumed so much of my life its turned my quite self absorbed and I'm always looking for someone to make me feel better . I used to love being a mum and was so involved but since my divorce I'm struggling to be a good mum and sometimes even feel the loving feeling you are supposed too has gone. I am very good at seeing peoples point of view and easily pick up when others are sad and I will try and help them as much as I can but I cant really connect to their sadness. Like the thought of people dying doesn't overwhelm me with sadness and that's not normal right? I've been trying to think if I've always been this way , yes to a certain extent I think I was but I loved and cared a hell of a lot more than I do now . I know I am depressed somewhat too. I have a massive fear of abandonment too. I've become a bit obsessed that I might be a narcissist. Although I do t think I'm special or above anyone else, quite he opposite .
  13. Thing is I have used that before and the ocd knowledge was pretty limited. Just wondering if anyone had a personal recommendation
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