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Everything posted by gingerbreadgirl

  1. As another ancient 30 something 😅 I agree this whole fomo just goes away as you get older. I was into all sorts age twenty and honestly I really regret it, if I could go back I would be my real boring self rather than trying to keep up. Summer I would just do you, be you, go to parties if you want to but equally don't go just to fit in, if staying in and getting a big pizza and watching a spooky film is your bag then do that. The people drinking and partying etc will not be having as much fun as they seem to be.
  2. Hi malina I'm sorry you're struggling with this. My ocd has revolved heavily around my partner in the past. It loves to attack the things that are important to us. My advice would be to go back to basics - get a pen and paper and write down your compulsions and your triggers. Start with one and tackle it. I imagine a big compulsion is Ruminating on this issue, trying to figure out whether it's real or important and if so what you should do or not do etc. Next time you get triggered, brute force yourself away from trying to solve it, even if your brain is screaming otherwise. Just refuse to go there. Over and over again. If you have other compulsions eg talking to your husband about it or anything else around trying to figure this out, write it down, catch yourself doing them, and turn away over and over. Take a leap of faith. It will feel all wrong. You'll feel like you can't do this unless you're certain it's ocd. But you know that it doesn't work like that. For now just take that leap anyway and keep turning away from trying to figure it out. You can do this xx
  3. So sorry you're experiencing this summer it sounds awful. I feel very bleak in the week before my period and I can relate to this (although I don't suffer as bad as you). I agree that going private if you can might be a good idea to avoid the waiting lists. I don't know what to suggest re work as I agree it can be very very hard when feeling like this. Can you go home sick? X
  4. I think be kind to yourself too! This is a rough condition and it's not always simple or easy to do these things even if we know we need to (been there done that ) - try not to beat yourself up - just do what you can xx
  5. Hi phillev My view is the same as DRS1 who's given some great advice I think. My ocd has latched onto this kind of thing in the past - and I know it feels absolutely ESSENTIAL that you find a way to resolve it / put it to bed. The hard truth though is that you will never get complete certainty. You will only start to feel better when you leave it be, let the uncertainty be, let the discomfort be - let it all be. And don't go back to it no matter how tempting or how loud your brain screams at you. The longer you can do this, the more the anxiety will fade and the less this will bother you. Maybe find something distracting to do today if you can. I know this is much much easier said than done - it can feel impossible when in the middle of it - but just try to take a leap of faith if you can xx
  6. Extremely unhelpful comment in my opinion given the poster's concerns.
  7. I agree with snowbear, belanna - I know this is extremely difficult, but if you don't go to the wedding because of ocd it will hurt your brother in a way that will be hard to come back from. It will also massively reinforce your ocd and just compound your suffering through the years. Your dog is fine - people leave their dogs in the care of others all the time. Your brain is telling you otherwise - but you need to decide not to do what your brain says and do what you know you must do. You can do this x
  8. Hi wren I identify a lot with this, I struggle with the way everything is very morally black and white especially on twitter (and I've been guilty of getting caught up in this before). There is no room for nuance or shades of grey - everyone is either good or bad. Which then leads me to think "omg am I one of the bad ones" etc. I don't know what the answer is other than working on core beliefs around not needing to accept an opinion just because someone gives it, even if very confidently. I like Twitter but I am choosy about who I follow because it can feel very hostile at times. There are some lovely accounts though that aren't like that at all. Anyway that's not very helpful but just wanted to say I agree totally!
  9. What your wife deserves is to be allowed to live her life in peace. Give her that
  10. I can see that your ocd has now turned to another topic...do you see what happens here? Need to change the script mate x
  11. do you see how this happens? before all you could think about was your threesome fantasy - i'm willing to bet you're now feeling like that wasn't important really compared to this new thing. stop this now nll before you wind up consumed and miserable about a new thing - take a new path, make that decision now xx
  12. Nll you are hankering for reassurance but I really hope you put this down and leave it alone x
  13. NLL why don't you go and do something else rather than writing on here - and you can come back and tell us what you did - watch a TV programme, read a book, listen to a podcast, play a game, anything that occupies your brain x
  14. noooooo no no no no no no please nll please step back from this and stop. there is ALWAYS a reason why "this one feels different" do you want to be in the same place 5, 10 years from now? If not - start choosing a different path right now
  15. keep doing this, get really stubborn with yourself, don't get drawn into it in any way whatsoever
  16. Not getting drawn into this nll. Leave this be. Leave it alone now and decide right now to not do anything with this nothing at all. I really hope nobody engages with this to offer reassurance as it keeps you stuck. You've been stuck long enough - choose a Different path before this takes over. Choose it now and keep choosing it.
  17. Let this go before it starts. Leave it in the past where it belongs. Do something else and choose to leave this alone RIGHT NOW before it becomes another thing that consumes your life.
  18. what other songs would you like to be able to play, could you pick a song you can't play at the moment and try and get really good at it?
  19. Rome wasn't built in a day What songs gave you been playing on your guitar?
  20. This is how everyone with ocd feels and it's bloody horrible. The thing is though you can help it even if you think you can't. You can be willing to feel these uncomfortable feelings and decide to just invite them in.
  21. So you did a compulsion and now you feel bad - kind of simple really. No point not confessing to your wife or here if you just go and do it somewhere else. If someone with contamination ocd washed their hands in the kitchen instead of the bathroom do you think that would help with their ocd
  22. Ah nice that you grew up in such a musical household - that must've given you a bit of street cred at school! 😁
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