hedvig

Me too. I’ve had the same obsessions for years too. Polarbear usually describes how his obsessions stuck around for about 40 years if I’m not mistaken. I think this is why the cognitive work is so important. Medication might help lift your mood and take away the anxiety but unless you do something about the way you think and try to challenge the beliefs you have about yourself you’ll remain stuck.

Weee, so glad you went for the appointment! This makes me really happy to hear! Be proud of yourself for taking this important step forward. Take care of yourself now and good luck, hope you’ll feel the meds kicking in soon and that it’ll contribute to your recovery!

Great work Headwreck, just keep it up! ??

I think what we need to challenge is the binary thinking: good/bad, innocent/guilty. It is possible to change this! I like the saying that accepting ourselves and our history is the bravest thing we’ll ever do. You can get past this (I know because I did) and you can begin to like yourself again but you have got to give yourself a chance.

I don’t feel like I have to, I do it because I want to. Because I care about you! You really don’t deserve to be treated the way you treat yourself. Thank you, so nice of you to remember that I’ve gotten back to work. It has gone a lot better than I expected. The days prior were quite anxious but I feel a lot better already.

Headwreck, I’m heading to bed but please know we are here for you and that we all care about you. Try to get some sleep and remember also that Sundays can be more difficult before work. I’ll log in tomorrow to check on you. x

I’m quite sure that by now he knows you’re not certain of anything and how you doubt and blackpaint yourself so he would know you saying that doesn’t make it true and therefore wouldn’t jump on that and kick you out.

It doesn’t matter how you label it. You can’t go on like this. Are you sure it is really like that? I’d suggest you make that call anyways and describe your situation.

I know. Hey, you have got to take that small sparkle of self trust and self care that you have inside of you and fight for yourself.

Call your doctor again tomorrow. Don’t make any big decisions such as separating while feeling like this. Really wish there was something I could do for you.

Remember the promise you made to yourself the other day when you were in a better place. You have to sit with the anxiety tonight, resist giving in to the ruminating. Divide the time if necessary, take 5 or 10 minuters at a time. Welcome the anxiety and be in it without engaging. The post you wrote just now is just your anxiety speaking.

I think a lot of people do that to some extent. Yes, your anxiety (OCD) has definitely latched on to this making you draw conclusions like you are a sociopath, a horrible person or would end up in jail. It’s nonsense. Great that you are contacting your GP - I wish you all the luck!

Headwreck, please go visit your GP so you can get help managing your anxiety. I really think you need this in order to tackle your OCD. I think it might give you enough strength to then change your thinking around this event. You have to ask for help. You deserve it.

I see, so the intrusive thoughts made you anxious and you started googling to find relief and answers. I know how it goes. I think the important thing here for you is to recognize this as another intrusive thought and just try to leave it unanswered. Do not examine that memory any further.

You don’t have to do anything, OCDhavenobrain. You had an intrusive thought that something wrong might have happened, started digging into the past and found this. Got more anxious, kept ruminating over it. Now try to stop this before it builds up even more. One thing I’ve noticed is that you often write you’ve read something on a forum. What kind of forum is that? Is it really helpful to spend time there? People might have all kind of opinions about topics like these but as far as I’m concerned there is no universal rule that teachers cannot be present in the locker room. It is actually one of the most common areas in schools for bullying to take place so in the earlier school years it might be necessary to have an adult present.