paianjen

Thanks, yes it was. I still feel completely embarrassed.

I picked up my purse which was handed in at the depot and my fears of hypomania have subsided a lot.

Thanks I try and do 10,000 every day. I think I probably overdid it today though but I do like walking.

Thanks @northpaul @snowbear. I cannot believe I did something so stupid I did 18000 steps and was really tired. I hadn't wanted to do that many and now wish I hadn't. I'm going to ring the bus company tomorrow to see if it was handed in.

I feel like if I hadn't been so careless it wouldn't have happened in the first place.

So I've been doing pretty well up until today but I just did something really stupid. I left my purse on a bus. I haven't done this for years. I've cancelled all my cards etc but feel completely ridiculous. Earlier today I also forgot about an online class I was supposed to be doing. I have been getting more exercise recently and trying to keep up a fitness regime but I think I overdid it a bit and went and did a lot more today with a friend than I was intending to. It was really hot. Anyway, my ocd is now trying to convince me that I'm getting a mental illness and leaving my purse on a bus is a sign of hypomania as I haven't done it in so long and it was irrational and impulsive. I have cancelled all my cards but just feel so stupid and ridiculous and now my ocd is telling me things are about to get much worse.

@determination987i think being mean to myself always ends up making the ocd worse.

I'm going to one in person and online in Oxford. Not connected with ocd-uk though as far as I know

for some reason that made me laugh. I think that must be me as I have had most of such obsessions.

@worrier I have a premenstrual condition which is accompanied by intense rage at certain times of a month and earlier this year i was absolutely terrified I'd act on my intrusive thoughts as they were occurring when I was extremely angry. However, I did not do so, and am now far more stable on medication that controls the mood swings. If you are legit worried about acting on your thoughts then you should go to a doctor and see if you can get your medication changed or increased, and hopefully that can deal with the anxiety or any other mental processes. However as it is, it seems that you posting on here is a compulsion and I don't really want to end up fuelling it.

Sorry if I was harsh in my replies to you @worrier. I have been there with the hearing voices obsession, I hope you feel better soon.

You're constantly on these forums asking about schizophrenia. It's clear ocd is severely impacting your life. Why would schizophrenia be any worse than the mental disorder you have currently? I'm not trying to be harsh because I have the same worries about mental disorders, but it's worth asking yourself that.

You say you have been on these sites several hours and can't get off them, what is that a sign of? Would having schizophrenia really be 'worse' than having ocd?

What are you googling? Going on Reddit at all makes my OCD hundreds of times worse. You can always find a worst case scenario. I'm glad you are recognising these are compulsions and not anything else.

Yes, when I start to feel better I start worrying that I didn't really have OCD!