Everything feels wrong

[Cmck43]

Hi

I have just finished work for the week. Myy heart is pounding I have whole only stoma h and I feel weak. I was asked to write a letter for a pupil as his mum is fighting for a refferal for assessment for disability. I am his Lear ing support teacher so I wrote down what I have observed. I thought I had done this OK but since being home I am really uncertain. What if I have been too harsh or not clear enough. What if my letter ruins the whole thing? I am tempted to go into work tomorrow to see if there has been a complaint even though it is my day off. At least that way I would know how things are and I can prepare myself for Monday and it won't come as much of a shock- the complaint that is.

[daveuk]

You done the letter and observe so you done your part. What happens next happens you do what is needed don't worry on it.

[snowbear]

2 hours ago, Cmck43 said:

I am tempted to go into work tomorrow to see if there has been a complaint even though it is my day off.

Does that sound to you like the sort of thing someone without OCD would do? 

Would finding out there's no complaint enable you to put this out of your mind, or would a new worry and a new compulsion to check everything is ok soon take its place?

What advice would you give to another forum user who posted this kind of worry?  

[Cmck43]

Thankyou both so much for your thoughts and advice. I didn't go into work which is good. I still feel so bad though. Please can you help me. I am due to start CBT next week. I had a session last week and the therapist said that I see threat everywhere. He said that he feels we need to focus on four areas: negative core beliefs, erp, general anxiety and something called rapid eye desensitization or something. He said this could help with PTSD, I was raped when I was fourteen. He was very reassuring and I have worked with him before as I have bipolar disorder. The thing is that the intrusive thoughts are as strong and frightening g as ever and I cannot zee the wood for the trees. Please do you have any advice on how to cope until I see my therapist next week.

Thankyou

[Cmck43]

Please, can anyone help?

[PolarBear]

I think the best thing you can do is take up some relaxation/mindfulness exercises. Try to relax. Stress makes OCD worse so it stands to reason that getting rid of stress will make things better.

[Cmck43]

Thanks pb. I will try to follow your advice. I feel so bad though, I am getting waves of anxiety though. I have started picking g the skin on my hands and they are sore and bleeding.

[PolarBear]

Try to get yourself involved in some other activity that's less harmful than picking your skin. That's a habit and it's one you can break if you work at it.

[Cmck43]

I really am trying but the thoughts and physical symptoms are coming thick and fast. I just feel so overwhelmed.

[Cmck43]

Sorry.