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PolarBear

Bulletin Board User
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Everything posted by PolarBear

  1. PolarBear

    Back again

    You are only wasting your time. You spend all your time figuring this out and you get nowhere with it. That is a hallmark of OCD. You don't have to be anxious. You spend so much time trying to convince yourself this isn't OCD but that just strengthens the evidence that it is.
  2. PolarBear

    Happy New Year! Update

    Yup, and you keep doing it until the words lose their sting.
  3. We give you support Phil. I don't know what you're looking for but we guve you and everyone else fact-based strategies to get past this. You come back with this long diary of qhat OCD is up to today and what compulsions you've done or contemplated. What support are you looking for?
  4. PolarBear

    Back again

    Well, bluegas... You say 'if posting numerous times helps...' It doesn't. Not in this way. And how numerous is too numerous? I've been around for five years and I can tell you that there are people posting the same things today as they were five years ago. And hundreds of times in between. They're stuck. We want to get them unstuck and out of their OCD cycle. Those of us who have been here a while can recognize when someone is spinning their wheels and we urge them to change course. Reassurance is bad. Period. In the beginning, a little is okay but at some point, after X months or years, as a helper, you have to realize you are enabling the disorder and not helping the sufferer. Hardline? I suppose. Know that every person here was or is a sufferer. We were all the hamster on the OCD wheel. And our words never come with anger. We do this because we want to help. And because we know there is a way out. I talk very plainly and factually. It's not what some people want to hear. I try to tell them what they need to hear. It's too bad you think you'll suffer forever. It doesn't have to be that way.
  5. PolarBear

    Back again

    Good deal.
  6. PolarBear

    Back again

    Well, I'm not going to engage with your compulsions by answering your questions. It didn't work the last dozen times we tried that so it's very unlikely to work now. You don't have to believe this is OCD right now. You just have to treat it like it is. First and foremost, you must stop going to those other forums.
  7. The good news, Dave, is that although you have done this to yourself (like all sufferers do), you have the power to undo what was done.
  8. Unfortunately, this is what happens when you think and think and think about something. No good comes from it. You started with a simple belief that certain things are disgusting. That grew into you believing that disgusting things were everywhere (when they're not). You ruminated about this, basically all the time. And you did other compulsions, like taking extra care to avoid these disgusting things (which were, for the most part, not there). All this did was to reinforce your initial belief in your head. Things became even more disgusting, causing you to take extreme measures to avoid them. And round and round you go. At the end of the day, it's OCD. You got a thought stuck in your head and you made matters so much worse by doing compulsions. Your mind screams at you that there is contamination everywhere when it isn't. Let's look at your post above: 1. "There are too many contamination risks from there (the toilet)." No, there aren't. Even with an uncareful brother in the house, your bathroom is no more contaminated that anyone else's. 2. "Things that repulse me." You created the situation that these things repulse you, far more than anyone else. 3. "I don't want my brother's urine on my clothes or in my bedroom." Unless your brother is directly peeing on your clothes or all over your bedroom, the risk is very low that this will happen. 4. "I don't want excrement, mine or anyone else's, on my person or in my room." Same as above. As with urine, the risk is very low -- the same risk that everyone else on the planet lives very comfortably with. 5. "Living things are disgusting." This is a cognitive distortion. You have created this false belief in your mind. 6. "How have I only just noticed this?" It's been coming for a long time, because you keep your focus on this mundane thing all the time. 7. "And why is it that I seem to be the only human being that gets stuff on their hands?" You aren't. Chances are that most of the time, you don't get stuff on your hands. It's all an OCD lie, but your mind tells you that you did. Still a lie. Unfortunately, you buy into it. And other people do get pee, etc. on their hands. It's just not that big a deal. It's life. I want you to clearly understand that you have done this to yourself. Sure, for a long time it was because you didn't know that what you were doing (compulsions) was wrong, but you've been around long enough that you know compulsions make things worse. Yet you continue to do them. Only you can get yourself out of this.
  9. It's okay. This happens all the time, with lots of people. Thoughts get stuck. And sufferers go round and round with the thought. It's OCD. You get intrusive thoughts, which cause distress. You do compulsions to alleviate the distress. That's it. That's OCD. Asking why is fruitless. We really don't know why certain people get stuck on certain thoughts. But we do know how to fix it. Focus on fixing it.
  10. PolarBear

    False memory

    Phil, there are a number of people on the forum that suffer from this theme.
  11. This is, I believe, the third time you have related the same story. What are you doing? You've received explanations and advice. It's like you forget about those and start again at the beginning, telling the same story. How's that working for you?
  12. So you have OCD about OCD. Nothing unusual about that. Many people go through this. They all feel they are making excuses. Chances are, nothing we say will convince you that this is OCD. We'll run around in circles with you and you will remain stuck. Better not to go down that road. Take a leap of faith that this is the same old OCD, just under a new guise. You have intrusuve thoughts that cause distress and you do compulsions. That's all that is required for it to be OCD. Take a leap of faith and begin treating this as OCD. You don't have to believe it is at rhis point. Just do the work.
  13. PolarBear

    Was feeling better

    You have been told repeatedly to stop going to those other forums. Every time you go there, you feel terrible and then come here to complain about it. Figure it out! It's like you keep touching a hot burner and complain to us your hand hurts. Stop touching the burner!
  14. PolarBear

    Can't cope

    You need to have a conversation with yourself and your doctor about your meds. If they were working before, reducing your anxiety to manageable levels, why would you stop them on your own? Losing weight, okay, but your mentsl health is just as important as your physical health. What you are doing now is ruminating. It's a compulsion and it's making your situation worse. Refuse to get drawn into thinking about that lock. Get yourself busy doing something else. Tomorrow will come soon enough.
  15. PolarBear

    Memory truth OCD.

    For years, you have been checking this so-called memory, trying to figure out if it is true or not. Has all that mental work done any good? Are you any closer to the truth now than you were years ago? If not, what makes you think more thinking will bring you to the answer? At some point you have to tell yoursrlf that what you've been doing isn't working and won't work in the future. Then you work hard to stop doing it. Also, you don't have to figure it out. You don't. You are under no obligation to come up with an answer. You are allowed to let it go.
  16. There is another way. You can go against the thoughts and start using all this stuff.
  17. PolarBear

    Reaction to exposure

    Things will usually get worse before they get better. After you've done an exposure often enough, it just doesn't have the sting it used to.
  18. It's happening because you have OCD and this is currently what your mind is focusing on.
  19. I gave you an answer to your question in your last thread. I suggest you go read it again.
  20. PolarBear

    Happy New Year! Update

    Excellent.
  21. PolarBear

    Fed up

    You have been told this likely dozens of times! We have taken the time to explain why it is OCD. But all our work is falling on deaf ears right now. The reason is simple. In addition to having sexual themed OCD, you have OCD about having OCD. On the subject of whether this is OCD or not, you are reacting with an OCD mindset. There is really no reason for us to keep going over this with you. You ignore our words and advice, revert to doing compulsions and remain stuck. You have to change whst you are doing or you will stay stuck.
  22. PolarBear

    Fed up

    Another thread. Same old, same old. When you get truly sick and tired of your situation and you want to take on our advice, we'll be here.
  23. PolarBear

    Does this mean it's true?

    When you are done with the histrionics, we'll be here, if you want to listen and are willing to change your ways.
  24. PolarBear

    Why me again?

    Oh well. I would gladly roll all over that carpet for you and lick the doorknobs. Wouldn't bother me a bit. The contamination only exists in your head.
  25. It's all self help. A therapist teaches you what to do, as we do. But you actually have to do it.
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