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Symps07

OCD-UK Member
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About Symps07

Previous Fields

  • OCD Status
    Sufferer
  • Type of OCD
    Rumination & Intrusive thoughts are the main 2. But also a variety of others

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    United Kingdom
  • Interests
    Music, Socialising, Exercising (when motivated!), Cinema

Recent Profile Visitors

3,325 profile views
  1. I live in Cheshire and the things I like about where I live is that there is plenty of beautiful countryside to roam and also plenty of local history including Beeston Castle.
  2. Thank you for your response Gemma. I am thinking of doing both as with my private therapist we're not concentrating as much on my OCD but more the underlying beliefs so I still want to do CBT for my OCD as I really want to get rid of it this time!
  3. Hello, I just wondered if you can take SSRI's even if you re not seeing an NHS Therapist but a private one instead? I have been referred to see a CBT Therapist via the NHS but have been advised that I have to wait a while as there are a high number of people using the service at the moment, understandable as I am sure that there are more people struggling than usual due to the Covid situation, so in the meantime I am seeing a private therapist. I have seen my private therapist once and although she knows that I have OCD most of what we have talked about is to do with my underlying beliefs and there has been talk of challenging some of these (for example, I tend to try and life up to my Dads expectation of me and this cause's me problems as I have my own ideas of how to live my life) so they are not necessarily OCD but may effect some of the 'subjects' my OCD chose's to pick up on. I am fully intent on using the NHS service CBT to deal with my OCD but obviously if with my private therapist we end up dealing with my OCD I don't want to take up somebody else's space and would need to let the NHS know. But as I was subscribed SSRI's by the NHS with them knowing that I had been referred for NHS CBT would they still grant me a prescription knowing I was going private? I hope this make's sense as I am struggling with my concentration at the moment. Symps
  4. Thank you all for your response's and I know what you say is true. Even I know that when my mind is more stable. The next day after posting this I phoned my doctor and told him that I was struggling to control my thoughts and was feeling suicidal and he has started me on some SSRI's so I am hoping that these will help me whilst I proceed with my therapy. It really is scary how I can know that I am performing a compulsion but also that I am so desperate that I can't stop myself 😢
  5. Good morning, I know that confessing is a compulsion of OCD but when I try not to confess I feel sick to my stomach with guilt. I had an episode last evening where I confessed something to my fiancée and I just couldn't stop crying and I felt so bleak like I don't want to be here anymore and even know I am struggling with myself. I got aroused looking at a girl from work. I know it sounds perverted and grubby and I am ashamed of myself. I feel like a sex offender and that I have cheated on my fiancée and don't deserve her love. I feel that I pushed myself to become aroused as well and I don't know if that makes it better or worse? I just want to feel pure and not have these thoughts, I don't want to be here anymore. I'm sorry for the whine but I have never felt this bad before or this intense. When I was crying I couldn't see a future and afterwards I just started thinking about taking drastic action. I love my fiancée, at least I feel I do now but I don't trust my thoughts. I keep thinking how much this must be hurting her and although she says that she is alright, I hate what I have become. I feel as though this post is confessing but right now I really don't know. I feel lost and ashamed. Symps
  6. Yes, twice. Although only one was for OCD and that was 10 years ago and we never covered rumination. I am putting some of the things that I have learned into practice and reading the information on this site has helped me a lot. I do also have a book on CBT to read through but I would just like a supporting hand to help me through this. I actually feel quite positive about getting rid of this as Ii finally feel that I am at the stage where I can beat this! I hope that you're keeping well? Symps
  7. Yes, although I was advised that I will be on a waiting list for a while 😢 It sounds as though it might be useful to me as I have a habit of letting my mind wander off and then I end up ruminating. Can I ask if you use any App at all?
  8. I love the NHS but I work for a firm who purchase on their behalf and the waste is ridiculous (double figures £ for a bottle of water for meetings which you can get for under a pound). It doesn't impress me when politicians talk of investing huge sums on money into it when I think they need to look at where they can be saving money in the first place (not through cuts but through wastage) a decent purchasing and sourcing department would be a good start!
  9. Good morning, I have been on the phone to my local NHS wellbeing support to arrange a referral to see a therapist and the lady that I spoke to who did my referral interview suggested that I try mindfulness to try and help with my OCD as I said that my main issue is with rumination and that I am struggling to control my thoughts. I said to her that I believed that CBT was the correct way to deal with OCD (I can remember someone suggesting mindfulness on here in the past and Ashley I believe advised that CBT is the correct method of treatment) and she advised that it was CBT but that Mindfulness would help me to control my thoughts and advised me of a few apps I could try on the subject. I'm afraid that I am not update with the current recommended methods of dealing with OCD, but is using mindfulness now more accepted method of dealing with OCD (if only as a supplement and not a replacement for CBT) and is there anyone on here who has tried mindfulness and found that it helps with their OCD? Symps
  10. Hi Sped691, Reading your post is like reading a review of my own life these last few weeks right down to the fact that I am also a 38 yo male! I have been struggling with my job for a while and since before Christmas was not sleeping and then was struggling to get up in the morning and was also getting into work late. It spiked last Tuesday evening and I have been off since Wednesday last week and I am currently referring myself to my local NHS Mental Health department to see a therapist. My first suggestion would be to ask if you are seeing a therapist and if not, it sounds like it would be something worth doing. If in the meantime there is anyone you can speak to about your OCD who you would feel comfortable talking too, that might also help. I'd also recommend trying to take any unnecessary and un-needed pressure off yourself. For example, if there are things that need doing around the house such as cleaning or tidying up, you can put pressure on yourself to do things to the point that they become daunting and this creates more anxiety that certainly won't help with your OCD. Perhaps at work, you can try slowing things down and prioritising tasks so you can deal with more urgent tasks first and then take time to ensure that they are completed before moving onto the next job. I know not all of this is working on your OCD, but looking at how my own OCD have reached the stage that it has, I can see that I wasn't always kind with myself and I put pressure on myself to do things that didn't help my anxiety which in turn stopped me from working on my OCD or feeling to overwhelmed and tired to do anything about it or just added extra anxiety onto existing problems. Symps
  11. I have reported this post as it is based on your opinion and has no basis in fact. This kind of comment could be quite harmful for someone dealing with their OCD.
  12. One I would say is to never be too hard on yourself. It's sounds simple but I see a lot of people on this forum who beat themselves up about their OCD and for relapsing or failing to prevent themselves from performing a compulsion and then they fall apart and end up frazzled (myself included). I believe it makes it worse as you are then fighting two battles, one against your OCD and one against the battle against your OCD and it can heap unwanted and unneeded pressure on yourself. The fact is, you will fail in stopping compulsions sometimes or relapse but you can choose to either learn from it (ie why did that happen) and use it as a positive or beat yourself over the head with it and say 'oh what's the point!', 'I'm not strong enough' etc... OCD is an ongoing battle and taking the pressure off yourself for not dealing with it perfectly is, I believe a big step in not only getting rid of unwanted pressure but also in realising that this is a disorder that you haven't asked for instead of 'I have these thoughts because I'm bad, crazy, messed up, etc... and now I can't get rid of them' (which is something I am slowly coming round to). I hope this makes sense or at the very least, isn't confusing? 🙄 Symps
  13. I'm not saying that you're are or aren't. I can't answer that for you, no one else but you can. I believe what Caramoole means above is, that when these thoughts come to you, don't engage with them as it's not helped you so far decide what you are and I would bet heavily that it won't help you in the future either. Your anxiety is feeding off your doubt and the more you engage with it the more you fuel it's flames. You need to try and deny the fuel.
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