UpsAndDowns

You put that very well. I've had exactly that fear also. That I'd be responsible for what happened. Try to stop looking for any signs of a bat. Instead, try to live with the uncertainty if your OCD tells you to keep looking.

Hi, Your fears sound a lot like mine! I had an incident a couple years ago where I got scratched real bad by a squirrel. I was worried about rabies but eventually accepted the recommendation from my doctor that I didn't need to get the shot. I also have hit-and-run OCD and I've been worrying a lot about possibly catching Covid-19 and spreading it to others. The best thing you can do is to avoid compulsions. Avoid washing your hands, avoid checking to see if you hit anyone, etc. Those things bring short-term relief but they teach your mind that the compulsions are necessary, when they're really not, and over time it can become worse. Stress definitely worsens my OCD symptoms. Have you been able to take any medications? I also recommend daily exercise if you can fit it in. I know I do much better if I can get some physical activity in each day. You're going to get through this!!

Hi, A common pattern with OCD is: (1) a strong, intrusive fear that you can't shake. (2) attempts to resolve the fear through some sort of compulsion (research, checking, testing yourself etc.) (3) possible short-term relief due to the compulsions, but it doesn't last and over time gets worse. (4) inability to find a concrete, permanent answer to your fears. It sounds like you're definitely experiencing this pattern. I think the two most helpful things for you to do would be: (1) recognize that you're going to continue to have these thoughts and fears, at least in the short-term. (2) don't engage with the thoughts. don't debate them, and don't try to seek out solutions/testing yourself. instead, continue focusing on the other things in your life.

Snowbear is right, it's best that you keep going to work. You can do it - just take one day at a time! The thoughts are going to be present, but try to give them less attention if you can. Recognize that they come and go but try not to engage with them. Over time their importance will fade.

Our minds are good at creating worst case scenarios! Wait and see what the accountant says, and try to put the worries aside in the meantime.

I think Caramoole is right. There's nothing you need to do. No confessions, no avoiding anyone, no checking on the internet to see if your thoughts are ok. Counterintuitively, the less you do in response to these worries, the better you'll feel over the long term. Engaging with the worries doesn't help, even though it feels like it will.

Hi Azam, That certainly sounds like OCD. People without OCD might check something once or twice, and then would be satisfied with the answer, whether it was the answer they wanted or not. But for people with OCD, it doesn't matter how many times you check or for how long. The anxiety diminishes for a little while but then the same problem returns and you feel the need to check again. Unfortunately, no amount of checking will ever relieve the fears. The fears are intrusive and irrational and the only way to make them go away (over the long term) is to stop checking and accept that the fears are there. It sounds like this is definitely interfering with your life. Is there a doctor or therapist you can discuss this with?

Hi Azam, These sound like very distressing thoughts. The likelihood of any of those things happening is low, but I understand the thoughts can be very scary. Do you have access to a counselor? It's possible you are suffering from OCD, but only a professional can make that diagnosis. Do you find that you engage in any repetitive behaviors to try to relieve your fears?

You can do it! Just take it one day at a time. Every compulsion you can avoid is a small victory. It's not going to go perfectly, but you will make it through!!

Hello! I have had a similar situation! It definitely sounds like you're experiencing OCD. First, stop searching the internet for answers. You won't find any! And even if you did, it will just fuel the OCD cycle! (In other words, after a few hours, you'll wonder if the answer you found is "good enough" for your situation.) I think Hedgehog's answer is good regarding your wife. In my experience, many people have fantasies about people other than their spouse. (I do, all the time.) I hope that doesn't make me a bad person, but everyone views these things differently. The best thing you can do right now is to continue living and find other things to keep you occupied. With OCD there is often no answer except accepting the situation as is and living with the discomfort. Best wishes

Hello! I too have obsessed about tax payments! I really dislike filling out all the forms and worry that I'll make a mistake. Because of the gambling and the bitcoin, could you perhaps have a professional do your tax forms for just this year? It might be costly, but less worrisome than trying to figure it out yourself. Once when I had a complicated tax situation I had a consultation with a professional and she answered my questions and told me which forms to fill out. If you do have a consultation, make sure to write down the answers you get. And then trust what you wrote. I was tempted to call the person again for reassurances (because of OCD) but I decided that I'll just trust that I wrote down the write information while we were on the phone.

Hi Frankie, I'm sorry, that sounds like a very difficult situation. From my own experience with OCD, it definitely warps your perceptions. You have powerful, irrational fears but don't necessarily realize that they're irrational or exaggerated. And on top of the intrusive thoughts there is also often an intense feeling of panic or anxiety, which drives a person to do compulsions (like hand-washing or asking for reassurance) over and over. And unfortunately family members can be drawn into these compulsions in hopes of making the sufferer feel better. Is there a counselor you can speak to?

Hi Ethel, You shouldn't feel guilty at all. It's not your responsibility to assuage his irrational fears. Further, as I'm sure you've observed, the reassurance only helps for a short period, then the same fears are back, sometimes stronger. So in reality, providing reassurance isn't really helping him. Times of high anxiety (congratulations on your baby!) will often bring about increased OCD symptoms. And a child is a large responsibility. So it's not surprising that his OCD might be more troublesome at this time. In order to be supportive, I think you should explain to him that providing reassurance (1) is exhausting for you and (2) isn't really helping in the long run, and that you need him to see a professional to address his fears because you cannot continue to offer constant reassurance. Has he had treatment for OCD in the past? If he has done exposure therapy before (perhaps to stop doing the physical rituals?) then he should understand that seeking reassurance only fuels continuing fears. It's probably just difficult for him to stop because his anxiety level is very high. Does he take any medication? He could speak to his doctor about increasing the dose. Another option that works well for me is some form of intense physical activity each day. A half hour of running or something might work well. (I find the longer I run the more it helps, but I understand you're both limited on time.) Another option is for you to speak to a counselor who maybe can provide some advice.

Hi Vivien, That sounds very difficult, I'm sorry. This may be something you need to discuss with a professional. It sounds like he does not have any motivation to get better, which is negatively affecting your life.

Oh, I have the vivid nightmares too. Mostly about two situations: Past jobs and not being able to find a loo!