Ray

Too many people on this forum act like they are therapists practicing ERP and not practicing compassion

Do you not think this response is lacking sensitivity? This person is bewildered and frightened by their thoughts - do you remember feeling that way?

Well maybe put some thought into talking to a doctor. OCD has many themes and is treatable.

In my experience the mental anguish and physical anxiety that comes with OCD can be horrible. Have you ever heard OCD called “the doubting disease”? It sure is! Have you spoken to a doctor?

OCD can fool the sufferer into believing all kinds of things. I’ve been in a world of weirdness, terror and shock for much of the last quarter century. Sexuality themed OCD is pretty common and also treatable.

My view is there are tons of causes but it's hard to say person to person. For example some people with OCD had awful childhoods while others had great childhoods etc. There's loads of research into possible causes but I'm not sure there's anything definitive. I've only known one person in the quarter century since my diagnosis who described himself as cured. Many people have a very good quality of life while living with it though.

If you consider private treatment the best route in my opinion is through the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy which has accredited CBT practitioners

Thanks again Hal

Thank you Hal. I’m still pleasantly surprised at the difference in attitude.

Thank you

I don’t think it’s arrogant to be getting on with and even enjoying life. The issue for me was I didn’t have any strategies to deal with the relapse or to stop it getting really bad. I’m not doing great but my situation in terms of accessing treatment is kind of complicated plus I live in Wales where we can’t self refer.

You sound like me. I was able to have a pretty stable life for several years and achieved a fair bit academically and professionally despite OCD never going away - then I relapsed last year. I've spent a lot of time online reading all kinds of things just like you and I see it as other forms of reassurance seeking/compulsions - for me I mean. It's indicative of bewilderment and also - for me - the fear of losing my mind. I know the physical anxiety I feel isn't "impending madness" but I'm not entirely convinced if that makes sense. Regarding medication and this is from a totally layman point of view the medications you've been prescribed I assume are for anxiety and not specifically OCD? Medication used to treat OCD including SSRIs take quite a while to work with doses needing adjusting for many people. Sometimes the medication needs to be changed. Has therapy been suggested to you? Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - or rather a type of CBT called Exposure Response Prevention using imaginal exposure?

Thank you. I got so used to being spoken to in a very dismissive way I got weepy due to his different attitude.

I struck gold today. I decided after only two months with it to change to a different medical centre in the town we moved to last year. The way I was spoken to by two GPs was appalling and I felt very strongly there was no way I'd be able to trust either of them. I discovered this other place has two doctors with a specialist interest in mental health. I rang this morning and within half an hour one of them called me. He was kind, attentive and concerned about me in a way that no medical professional including those two GPs, community mental health team workers and more haven't been for years. I was crying at the start due to my distress and crying a little at the end of the appointment through the relief and maybe a little surprise at actually being listened to and helped to feel I matter. I've been prescribed Propranolol which is a beta blocker used for anxiety too and we'll discuss SSRIs at the next appointment or maybe I'll be prescribed medication at the OCD Specialist Services assessment on February 3. Obviously I know medication isn't generally the "solution" but I do feel today was a positive experience after being crushed by the ignorance, lack of compassion or even not being listened to over the last 12 months since I relapsed.

I'm horrified at how I've been treated Hal and I'm not one for drama or exaggeration. Earlier I rang this CMHT again asking about the report I mentioned above - where was my copy I mean. I was told by the co-manager of the CMHT he had to "look into" me getting the copy even I was told I could pick it up in person of have mailed to me last week. I asked for the latter as it wasn't practical for me to go to the centre. He said he'd phone me back. What a surprise - he didn't. I'm having to interact with a CMHT I hoped I'd never have to again after the way I was treated over a LONG period of time and it's extremely uncomfortable. This guy was giggling and interrupting me and couldn't see how important it is for me to see the report I was meant to see four months ago. It's not just important in fact - it's vital. As far as Feb 3 goes I'll definitely let you know how things go and thank you for being so considerate. I know what I want and I also know the psychologist in charge of this service as we had some sessions of ERP which was not graded exposure some years ago. At the time I didn't know much about graded exposure whereas now I do and this definitely wasn't it - no way. The advocate I think is more for support than anything although she is aware of all the BS I've had to deal with and has copies of correspondence about treatment as well as the letters of complaint I've made. I genuinely feel the only move if I don't get what I think I need AND deserve is to involve the local MP who I know very little about as we're pretty new to his constituency. As I've said before there's a difference between what NICE guidelines say about "treatment resistant" OCD and what is actually made available. I'm not prepared to be meek or passive now though. This is my future - literally - at stake.