The Battle Between Good and Evil

[Orwell1984]

Your mum would be the last person who would want to harm her daughter so ignore the paranoid thoughts that your mum will turn against you in some way. 

With hospitals and professional help, a lot of us have regained our lives and mental balance there and are here to tell the tale. Getting treatment does not take your mind away.

Go have a sleep. 8hrs sleep means fewer intrusive thoughts apparently   https://neurosciencenews-com.cdn.ampproject.org/c/neurosciencenews.com/people-sleep-less-8-hours-night-likely-suffer-anxiety-depression/amp/

[Purplepiper7]

I know that getting treatment in and of itself doesn’t take my mind away, but I’m afraid that if someone at the hispital is being influenced then they’ll give me something intended to make it difficult to use my brain effectively. Maybe my mom wouldn’t turn against me, I don’t know, but I’d rather not take that chance. Also I will go to sleep because my mom’s now making me take the sleeping medication that my doctor prescribed, but later because here it’s still really early.

[OceanDweller]

Until you accept that you are suffering from psychosis, that you have lost touch with reality, that there is no mission, that the voices in your head are just the product of your poorly mind, and that the only route back to wellness is via intervention from mental health professionals, there is nothing anyone on this forum can do to support you. Your symptoms are not related to OCD. You have a psychotic illness. PLEASE SEEK HELP.

[Orwell1984]

Oceandweller Ithi k you're wrong- the psychosis symptoms have developed because the OCD and resultant stress on the mind had gotten so bad. If you look back to the very start of PurplePiper's threads, you will see she has definitely got OCD. The psychosis is a scary development but it doesn't mean there is any other sort of mental condition at play.

 

purplepiper you do need to listen to people who are urging you to get help. We all agree on this. I hope you're having a better day today. Just plan getting better. 

[OceanDweller]

48 minutes ago, Orwell1984 said:

Oceandweller Ithi k you're wrong- the psychosis symptoms have developed because the OCD and resultant stress on the mind had gotten so bad. If you look back to the very start of PurplePiper's threads, you will see she has definitely got OCD. The psychosis is a scary development but it doesn't mean there is any other sort of mental condition at play.

Hi Orwell. OCD does not ordinarily result in psychotic hallucinations. Indeed, it’s a fear of many with OCD that the condition will develop into psychosis. OCD and psychotic illness are not commonly related. If Purplepiper continues to post details of her delusional thinking patterns on this forum instead seeking professional pharmaceutical and therepeutic intervention, her condition will only deteriorate.

[Orwell1984]

I agree- posting on here won't help. She needs professional and therapeutic intervention.

[Purplepiper7]

I am going to seek help, okay? I don’t have a choice; now that my mom knows she’s making me, and if I refuse she said she’d take me to the emergency room and they’d force me to stay in the hospital for at least 72 hours. I don’t want that, so I’m going to whatever doctor my mom makes me go to. Thing is, no one knows the specifics of my mission, so even though you all say it’s imaginary it also might not be, so just in case I think I should keep those details to myself. If you think it’s false, then why does it even matter if I tell them the real plan? If you really think I should stop posting on here, then I will, but it makes me feel better to talk about with people I know can’t hurt me.

 

[JennieWren]

I am really glad you have told your mum and that you are going to see someone about this. I wish you luck. You are in my thoughts. Personally I don’t mind you posting if it helps you get good advice and support from others who understand what you are going through. 

[Purplepiper7]

thanks 

[Orwell1984]

Hi Purplepiper, in my opinion, it doesn't matter what topics the voices are talking about so long as they aren't instructing you to harm yourself or others. If they're saying you have to harm yourself/others then you have to tell others about the content of the voices because that's dangerous. So it doesn't matter what topics you then tell the professionals, but you definitely do have to tell the professionals if the voices are instructing you to do harm. 

Keep posting on here if it makes you feel less afraid and less lonely but know that we can't really help you on here. The only real help is going to come from doctors. You need to have faith and talk to people you feel you mightn't trust. The alternative is that your psychosis is going to get worse, you'll take longer to recover and you'll feel far worse than you do already. If you can't make the leap of faith for your own health then do it for the sake of your family because they must be really worried and feel powerless to help because they don't understand what's going on in your mind. 

[Orwell1984]

Hope you are doing a bit better today

[Purplepiper7]

Yeah I’m fine. Thanks Orwell. I hope you’re doing well. My head isn’t really muddled today, and none of the beings really said much outside or inside of my mind. Really it feels like there are two different worlds. There’s the real one, in which the general populus is being watched and/or controlled, and in which humanity is on the path to being basically destroyed. Then there’s the one we’d like to believe is real, in which everything is fine and people like me are just crazy. I don’t know, it’s strange that sometimes the world looks fake and I think it’s a message reminding me not to trust what the government, the school system, etc. is telling me. But sometimes, especially when I’m playing my clarinet or laughing with someone at school, everything seems fine and I don’t think about everything. I read somewhere, I don’t remember where, that Satan tries to divide the human race. Maybe he was trying to make us indifferent to one another and by extension the world we live in. Maybe he tried to separate us by race or nationality or language or geography; I don’t really know. But I do know that we do seem to be separating from one another. I think everyone can hear the forces of good and evil, but that they just don’t recognize them as such. I’m not entirely sure about everything, but no one’s telling me to wake up anymore so I think I’m on the right path. I think I am. I don’t really want to see a doctor but again I don’t really have much of a choice. I’m really tired so I’m going to take a nap before I do my homework.

[Orwell1984]

Hi Purplepiper, I'm glad you've had an easier day! It's nice when the brain decides to give us a break! Must be your lucky day today!!   It's definitely clear from the way you are writing that you are a very intellectual individual and at the moment it's a double edged sword. You're thinking very philosophically and that dips into rumination really easily, which worsens OCD so it's most likely driving your condition.  I discovered this article and it reminded me of the discussions on this thread: http://bjp.rcpsych.org/content/176/3/281 I know you're not sure about anything, but hopefully with time things will become clearer. The feeling of being on the outside and looking in, as if you're the only one who knows the real truth about things and everyone else is unaware is a horrible feeling sometimes. Things will get better, you're not alone. Keep seeing your doctor as well. It's a good step. Sleep is also another good step! 

[Purplepiper7]

I’m not delusional. I’m probably not the only person who knows about the battle, and I’m certainly not the only one who knows that many of the higher ups in the government are up to something that involves destroying us. Also my cat was really frightened by me this morning, but I don’t think I was scaring her, I think she could sense the forces of evil and that she feared them. They said they would get out. She’s not afraid now so maybe she can also see the forces of good and she understands that they can’t physically hurt her. At first, I too thought that the demons and angels were OCD, but that was before I woke up. I honestly didn’t believe the battle was real until I started really thinking about what the government as a whole has been doing and what that implies about their intentions. Satan wants despotism, and we’re letting it happen without even realizing because we’re too busy being distracted by all of the lies that we’re being told.

[OceanDweller]

1 minute ago, Purplepiper7 said:

I’m not delusional. I’m probably not the only person who knows about the battle, and I’m certainly not the only one who knows that many of the higher ups in the government are up to something that involves destroying us. Also my cat was really frightened by me this morning, but I don’t think I was scaring her, I think she could sense the forces of evil and that she feared them. They said they would get out. She’s not afraid now so maybe she can also see the forces of good and she understands that they can’t physically hurt her. At first, I too thought that the demons and angels were OCD, but that was before I woke up. I honestly didn’t believe the battle was real until I started really thinking about what the government as a whole has been doing and what that implies about their intentions. Satan wants despotism, and we’re letting it happen without even realizing because we’re too busy being distracted by all of the lies that we’re being told.

Anyway Purplepiper... when is your appointment with the Psychologist?

[Purplepiper7]

2 minutes ago, OceanDweller said:

Anyway Purplepiper... when is your appointment with the Psychologist?

I don’t know yet. My mom said she’s setting it up but she hasn’t said anything other than that and that I’m stressed.

[OceanDweller]

1 minute ago, Purplepiper7 said:

I don’t know yet. My mom said she’s setting it up but she hasn’t said anything other than that and that I’m stressed.

Okey dokey. Keep us posted please.

[Purplepiper7]

These beings said that they were going to get out and lately I’ve been hearing ringing and similar sounds more often, so I fear that they’re closer to getting out. Plus they haven’t been as adamant about speaking to me from inside of my ears so I’m afraid that they’re instead putting that energy towards getting outside of my head. They still put thoughts in my head and stuff, but I don’t hear anything other than ringing. At first I thought that was good, but as it began happening more often I’ve become afraid.

[Orwell1984]

What is the status of help with a psychiatrist or counsellor? I've had ringing before too. It is very annoying but you have to try to ignore it and see it as another indication your mind is very overworked and tired

[Purplepiper7]

I don’t know what’s going on with anything anymore to be honest. My mom, a psychiatrist, school, etc. It doesn’t mean anything to me anymore. All that I’m reasonably certain of is that humanity is in trouble and that I have to do something about it no matter what.

[OceanDweller]

2 hours ago, Purplepiper7 said:

These beings said that they were going to get out and lately I’ve been hearing ringing and similar sounds more often, so I fear that they’re closer to getting out. Plus they haven’t been as adamant about speaking to me from inside of my ears so I’m afraid that they’re instead putting that energy towards getting outside of my head. They still put thoughts in my head and stuff, but I don’t hear anything other than ringing. At first I thought that was good, but as it began happening more often I’ve become afraid.

This is simply further delusional thinking Purplepiper. I know you can’t recognise it just now, but you will. It seems to be taking a while for you to be assessed by the psychologist. Any developments?

[Purplepiper7]

3 minutes ago, OceanDweller said:

This is simply further delusional thinking Purplepiper. I know you can’t recognise it just now, but you will. It seems to be taking a while for you to be assessed by the psychologist. Any developments?

i don’t know really

[OceanDweller]

1 minute ago, Purplepiper7 said:

i don’t know really

Can you find out?!

[Purplepiper7]

i feel strange lol everything feels and looks fake i don’t know how to explain it maybe because my throat hurts idk

[Purplepiper7]

my mom is kind of scary and i don’t want to ask because i’m afraid